How to Become Pregnant? (CREDIT: NEON)

Starring: Sydney Sweeney, Álvaro Morte, Benedetta Porcaroli, Dora Romano, Giorgio Colangeli, Simona Tabasco

Director: Michael Mohan

Running Time: 88 Minutes

Rating: R for Disturbing Behavior in the Name of Salvation

Release Date: March 22, 2024 (Theaters)

What’s It About?: Cecilia (Sydney Sweeney) is absolutely ready to devote the rest of her life to God. But perhaps she didn’t quite envision her vocation as a nun happening at Our Lady of Sorrows in the Italian countryside. In addition to her standard vows of poverty, chastity, and obedience, her primary duties include looking after the sick, older sisters, who are beset by metastasizing tumors and incontinence. Nevertheless, she remains committed, although some of her fellow nuns eye her with suspicion. On top of all that, she suddenly finds herself pregnant, even though she insists that she’s never had sex with anyone. And in fact, we’re given every indication that she’s being honest and that instead something much more sinister is going on.

What Made an Impression?: What Year is This?: Isolation from the outside world is a good idea every once in a while. But as a way of life day in and day out? Maybe it can work in certain situations, but in others, it’s a formula for exploitation. And so it goes in Immaculate, where there are zero signifiers about the temporal setting. Are there no modern amenities because they haven’t been invented yet, or because this particular religious order has chosen to forgo them completely? If I had to guess, I would say it’s set in the present day, as the medical technology appears to be up-to-date, although it’s wielded sparingly to wield control.
Why Her?: It’s difficult to analyze what happens in Immaculate without spoiling too much, so I’ll keep it vague and say that there’s a reason why Cecilia becomes pregnant. Or perhaps I should say: there’s a reason why someone becomes pregnant, although it’s not entirely clear why Cecilia is that someone. It might have something to do with her origin story of surviving a childhood accident when she got trapped underneath a frozen lake. Or maybe this movie’s title offers a clue about the character of her soul. Maybe. This isn’t the most thematically clear-eyed horror movie I’ve ever seen. But at least it covers its Final Girl in buckets of blood as she screams for her life and breaks the tension once or twice with some funny moments of frustration.

Immaculate is Recommended If You Like: Religious-themed escape rooms

Grade: 3 out of 5 Conceptions