Chal-a-met & Squirm-a-shay! (CREDIT: NBC/Screenshot)

Jeff “jmunney” Malone watches every new episode of Saturday Night Live and then reviews all the sketches and segments according to a “wacky” theme.

Well, here’s something. Timothée Chalamet is known for being an actor, and he’s also known for occasionally hosting Saturday Night Live. One thing he’s not really known for, though, is singing songs. But he’s nevertheless been booked as the host and musical guest of the latest episode of SNL. He recently played a famous singer-songwriter on the big screen, and I guess he enjoyed that experience, because now he’s performing Robert Zimmerman songs on the Studio 8H stage.

For my review of this episode, I’m going to take a cue from Nikki Glaser and adopt an Adam Sandler voice.

Declaration of Independence: Once again, this is something I wish someone had told me about my country YESTERDAY!

Timothée Chalamet’s Monologue: Well, Chalamet do as Chalamet day.

Bungee Class: I see you hiding that Cinnabon, now gimme some bungee!

Medcast: (Opera Man-style high note)

Barista Training: A Barista Chalamet? Well, oobie doobie shoobie!

Oedipal Arrangements: Mama said Greek mythology is the devil.

AI Podcast: Mm, artificial-ee-ay Chalamet!

Timothée Chalamet, “Outlaw Blues”/”Three Angels”: Bob Dylan used to light the menorah, but now he lights the … Chalamet.

Weekend Update: The Jokes: Thank-a you, Michael Che and Colin J.
Weekend Update: Giselle, A Concerned Businesswoman: Malay-ZHUN. Appala-SHUN. What about Ca-JUN?
Weekend Update: Andrew Dismukes and His Puppet Dad: I love ya, Dad.

If a Bunch of Dumb Little Dogs Talked and Acted Like People: A doggie doo Chalamoo, ooh hoo.

Timothée Chalamet, “Tomorrow is a Long Time”: A Chalamet singing Bobby Doo with the scarfaroo.

Grandma’s Birthday: Doctor-o Chalamo? Grandma likey.

An SNL Animated Short: God: And the big conclu-ZHUN with De-i-ty Chal-a-met.

Well, I’m glad I did that! And I hope you enjoyed reading it as well. We don’t know when the next new regular episode of SNL will be, or what guest lineup it will feature, but it’ll probably happen sometime in early March. In the meantime, the 50th Anniversary Special will air on the evening of Sunday, February 16, and my plan is to write up a live-blog review.