Back to Tribeca, 2022 Edition

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CREDIT: Courtesy of Tribeca Film Festival

Good news for people who like film festivals: the Tribeca variety was held once again in- New York City (and virtually) in 2022! When I attend, I like to select offerings that I probably wouldn’t watch otherwise. So this time around, those turned out to be a very 21st century tale of intellectual property theft, an Israeli middle age domestic drama, a short capturing the urgent demands of our bodily functions, and a documentary about one of the most beloved children’s shows of all time. Let’s take a closer look at each.

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Does ‘Lightyear’ Come to Our Rescue?

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CREDIT: Pixar/Screenshot

Starring: Chris Evans, Keke Palmer, Peter Sohn, Uzo Aduba, Taika Waititi, Dale Soules, Isiah Whitlock Jr., James Brolin

Director: Angus MacLane

Running Time: 105 Minutes

Rating: PG

Release Date: June 17, 2022 (Theaters)

I went ahead and saw Lightyear with my dad on the day before Father’s Day. You can certainly celebrate Father’s Day all weekend, after all! I think I also saw the first two Toy Storys with my dad (plus the rest of my immediate family) way back when, so this was a pretty cool way to sequelize that. As the credits were playing, I scrolled through the RunPee app, and then I explained to my dad what RunPee is. Kind of funny that he’s never heard about it before now even though it’s been around for years. That must’ve been what it was like for Buzz Lightyear when the other characters explained how he was affected by all the time dilation. I enjoy cinematic discussions about time dilation! (Even if they don’t hold up to the scrutiny of real-life physics.) The robot cat was also pretty cool, even though he wasn’t terribly feline.

Grade: 400 Lightyears out of 300 Rescues

‘Poser’ Combines Midwest Music, Podcasts, and Surreal Anxiety

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POSER (CREDIT: Oscilloscope Laboratories)

Starring: Sylvie Mix, Bobbi Kitten, Abdul Seidu, Rachel Keefe, Z-Wolf

Directors: Ori Segev and Noah Dixon

Running Time: 87 Minutes

Rating: Unrated (It would probably be PG-13 if it were rated)

Release Date: June 3, 2022 (Columbus, Ohio)/June 17, 2022 (New York and Los Angeles)

What’s It About?: A young woman in Columbus, Ohio named Lennon (Sylvie Mix) is really, really into the local music scene. So much so that she decides to start a podcast about it! Pretty much everybody is hosting a podcast nowadays, so why not, right? Furthermore, she’s a bit of an introvert, so this is a way for her to get in on the action that agrees with her constitution. But will she be able to actually book anyone for an interview? It doesn’t look particularly promising at first, but then she strikes up a rapport with Bobbi Kitten (playing herself), although things soon take a dark turn…

What Made an Impression?: This one will probably appeal most to folks who live in or around Columbus (and maybe other areas of the Midwest). A good chunk of the cast is made up of musicians from the area playing themselves. So if you’re into the scene, you’ll surely recognize things that I – a person who has never set foot in Ohio – had absolutely no idea about. Or maybe you’ll be annoyed by it all and think that this movie really lives up to its title! Either way, you’ll probably have more of an emotional reaction than I did.

As for what I did react to, there’s a moment when Lennon and Bobbi are hanging out with their hair dyed blue and pink, respectively, and I yelled to myself, “How can I tell them apart?!” Obviously, I was joking, as it was in fact quite easy to differentiate them, but that moment speaks to how their identities kind of start to fold in on each other. In a way, Poser is like a low-key 21st century indie version of Ingmar Bergman’s Persona, in which an actress and a nurse merge psychologically. It didn’t quite get under my skin as much as that Swedish classic, but it does have a bit of that stick-in-your-craw energy.

Poser is Recommended If You Like: Bright hair colors in dimly lit industrial landscapes

Grade: 2.5 out of 5 Music Podcasts

Does ‘Brian and Charles’ Earn a Spot in the Robot Friend Canon?

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Brian and Charles (CREDIT: Focus Features)

Starring: David Earl, Chris Hayward, Louise Brealey, Jamie Michie, Nina Sosanya, Lynn Hunter, Lowri Izzard, Mari Izzard

Director: Jim Archer

Running Time: 90 Minutes

Rating: Unrated (PG-level, But Maybe a Little Dark for Young Kids)

Release Date: June 17, 2022 (Theaters)

Sometimes when I’m watching a movie, I like to ask myself, “Would I want to live in this world?” That’s certainly not a requirement for a movie to be good, as there have been plenty of fascinating dystopias or gripping recollections of trauma. But if I’m going to spend at least an hour and a half or so in some fictional land, then it usually helps if it’s pleasant. And “pleasant” is certainly one way to accurately describe Brian and Charles. You could also call it charming, even! A rural Welsh fellow (that’s Brian, played by David Earl) builds a robot out of a washing machine and other random household items (that would be Charles, voiced by Chris Hayward) who inexplicably comes to life one day, Frosty the Snowman-style. I mean, how could I possibly resist?

This is low-key sci-fi, which is to say: no scientific explanation is given about how Charles comes to life. (By the way, he comes complete with a last name – “Petrescu” – that I’m fairly certain is NOT also Brian’s last name.) I suppose, then, given the lack of thorough details regarding the generative process, we should maybe instead call it low-key fantasy. But that would imply the presence of magic or some other supernatural force, and it’s not clear that that is what’s going on either. Whether low-key sci-fi or low-key fantasy, you almost feel like this whole turn of events could really happen. And that’s certainly fine with me, because I’d kind of like my own Charles Petrescu!

Much of Brian and Charles is conflict-free and narrative-light, which generally works in its favor. I’m a sucker for robots or other fish-out-of-water types learning about the vagaries of modern society while being gently guided along by their best buds, after all. There is a bit of a dark turn in the final act, as Brian has to confront a bully, which is a bummer certainly, but at least it tracks logically, as he is a rather meek fellow. And the resolution is lovely, what with Charles there to offer both ingenuity and emotional support. Simply put, Brian and Charles offers plenty of charisma in a uniquely offbeat and modest manner.

Brian and Charles is Recommended If You Like: What We Do in the Shadows, Pinocchio, A surprise rap during the end credits

Grade: 3.5 out of 5 Cabbages

‘Jurassic World: Dominion’ Takes it Worldwide

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Jurassic World Dominion (CREDIT: John Wilson/Universal Pictures and Amblin Entertainment)

Starring: Chris Pratt, Bryce Dallas Howard, Laura Dern, Jeff Goldblum, Sam Neill, DeWanda Wise, Mamoudou Athie, BD Wong, Omar Sy, Isabella Sermon, Campbell Scott, Justice Smith

Director: Colin Trevorrow

Running Time: 146 Minutes

Rating: PG-13 for Intense Dino Chomps

Release Date: June 10, 2022

What would happen if dinosaurs came back to life and then spread out all over the world? Dr. Ian Malcolm would crack jokes about it, you can be sure of that! Of course, that’s what always happens whenever Jeff Goldblum is in a Jurassic Park/World movie, even when the dino habitat is more contained. And that really illuminates how Dominion is just like any other movie in this series. It contains all the typical narrow escapes from T-Rexes and velociraptors, just with some Indiana Jones-style globetrotting thrown in. There’s at least a hint at first that things will be different this time around, as an opening news report seems to indicate that we’re in store for a probing examination about the global consequences of Arrogant Science Run Amok. But instead we mostly get everyone chasing after a MacGuffin. That’s understandable, because the MacGuffin is also one of the main characters. But still, the appeal of Dominion can be boiled down to: A Bigger Scale, But Also Everything is the Same.

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Watch Out!* Here Comes ‘The Phantom of the Open’! (*I Should’ve Said ‘Fore,’ Obviously)

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The Phantom of the Open (CREDIT: Sony Pictures Classics/Screenshot)

Starring: Mark Rylance, Sally Hawkins, Rhys Ifans, Jake Davies, Christian Lees, Jonah Lees

Director: Craig Roberts

Running Time: 102 Minutes

Rating: PG-13

Release Date: June 3, 2022 (Theaters)

Twice while watching The Phantom of the Open I violently kicked my leg forward as a reflexive response to some frightening golf shots. Luckily nobody was sitting in front of me, and the theater had been recently renovated so the seat had no trouble surviving the impact. On the first occasion, Maurice Flitcroft (Mark Rylance) missed a close putt (and then three more immediately afterwards!), and in the second case, his ball hard-sliced right into a camera lens. Those are the kinds of moments you expect in a biopic about a guy who somehow managed to play in the oldest golf tournament in the world despite having basically zero previous golf experience! But you don’t necessarily expect those moments to be thrilling and so satisfying. And yet that’s what they were, as they helped to peel away the suffocation of the game’s exclusivity and assured us that it would all end up okay.

Grade: 100 Bogeys out of One Birdie (Attempt)

Who Watches ‘Watcher’? Should It Be You? Let’s Find Out!

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Watcher (CREDIT: IFC Midnight)

Starring: Maika Monroe, Karl Glusman, Burn Gorman

Director: Chloe Okuno

Running Time: 96 Minutes

Rating: R for A Bit of Blood and a Tease of Sex

Release Date: June 3, 2022 (Theaters)

First she was being followed, now she’s being watched! And come to think of it, that watching also involves plenty of following. Maika Monroe just can’t catch a break! In the past decade, she’s kind of established herself as a go-to scream queen for creepy flicks that prey on our most elemental fears. As It Follows demonstrated, it’s no fun to be stalked, and now as Watcher makes abundantly clear, voyeurism isn’t so hot either. It’s also extra unnerving when you’re feeling kind of lonely in a new country where you don’t speak the native language, which is what Monroe’s character Julia experiences. This is a simple fear, and Watcher keeps it simple through and through.

When Julia arrives in her husband Francis’ (Karl Glusman) native Romania, you can tell she’s a little anxious, but the picture doesn’t look so bad at first. The passion is certainly there, if a hot and heavy living room makeout session that plays like the Skinemax version of Rear Window is any indication. That romantic interlude is undercut a bit by the fact that there’s a bit of a Peeping Tom named Daniel (Burn Gorman) in the vicinity, although his peeks into his neighbors’ lives appear to be relatively innocent at first. But soon enough, he seems to be lurking in Julia’s path at the grocery store, movie theater, and pretty much anywhere else she’s hanging out.

With his sunken eyes, oily hair, and slenderman-esque skin tone, Gorman is pretty much the perfect guy to play the local creep. It’s almost like oil is oozing out of every pore of his body. I hope that’s not coming off too harsh, because I also think that Gorman is handsome in a “modest English gentleman” sort of way. But I suspect that he knows the offputting stereotype he can tap into, thus (I imagine) why he accepted this part. Perhaps Julia has similar conflicting feelings about Daniel. After she reports his ostensibly threatening behavior to the police, he calls them in turn to report her for pretty much the exact same thing. Is this all just one big misunderstanding? Is Julia going loopy from spending so much time at home alone and having her mind become permanently lost in translation?

We get a pretty straightforward answer to those questions in the explosive climax, which is quite viscerally thrilling. Although, it all escalates rather abruptly and then peaces out just as quickly, so you don’t get a whole lot of time to process the worst of it. I’m thus tempted to ding Watcher for being a little bottom-heavy. But I’m not ready to definitively do that, as I’m writing this review less than 24 hours after my viewing. Maybe one day, I’ll find myself cooped up in some strange new home just like Julia and wonder who’s watching me

Watcher is Recommended If You Like: It Follows, Rear Window, Lost in Translation, The thriller subgenre of women being told that they’re losing their minds

Grade: 3.5 out of 5 Windows

 

David Cronenberg Looks Back, Ahead, Inward, and Outward with These Here ‘Crimes of the Future’

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Crimes of the Future (CREDIT: NEON)

Starring: Viggo Mortensen, Léa Seydoux, Kristen Stewart, Don McKellar, Scott Speedman

Director: David Cronenberg

Running Time: 107 Minutes

Rating: R for Body Horror at Its Finest

Release Date: June 3, 2022 (Theaters)

Who’s ready to party like it’s 1983 and strap in for some vintage David Cronenberg? Of course, the answer to that question is: Everybody! Alas, though, maybe not. We Cronenberg-heads are in fact a select breed. But there are enough of us that the arrival of Crimes of the Future in 2022 is cause for celebration as we harken back to the director’s 70s/80s bodily manipulation heyday. It even has the same name as one of Cronenberg’s earliest features! Despite that shared moniker, be forewarned that this isn’t a remake. I haven’t seen the previous Crimes, but based on the synopsis, it seems pretty clear that they don’t really have anything to do with each other, beyond the fact that Cronenberg envisions multiple ways to run afoul of the law in the coming dystopias.

The premise is both straightforward, and completely bizarre. Performance artist couple Saul and Caprice (Viggo Mortensen and Léa Seydoux) have a regular live stage show in which they grow and remove new organs in Saul’s body. Meanwhile, a subculture has developed around evolving the human body to be able to eat plastic (with delicious-looking purple candy bars aplenty). Okay, maybe that premise is straightforward only if you’re already a permanent resident of Cronenberg World. But the filmmaking coaxes you into thinking that all this is normal, starting with the opening scene of Saul hanging out at home in a newfangled hammock to recover from all that organ removal. Watch out, though, because here comes Kristen Stewart and Don McKellar on hand as a couple of “National Organ Registry” investigators to indicate that maybe this isn’t the most advisable practice around. But pretty much anyone who’s skeptical ends up getting seduced at some point in a sleekly sexy sort of way.

This is exactly the sort of vision that Cronenberg originally established his reputation on. It’s been a while, though, since he’s made something within this classic vein, even as he’s been steadily working every decade for the last 50-plus years. It’s a joy just to be immersed in something this trippy and transportative, even if the central mystery plot is a little hard to parse.  But I can forgive that thanks to the strength of the world building.

The major, somewhat disturbing, difference this time around compared to Cronenberg’s breakthrough classics is the cinematography. The bumpy film stocks of yore imbued the likes of Rabid and The Brood with a vibe that they’d been illicitly smuggled into cinemas, whereas the digital cleanness of Crimes gives off a sense that we’re home and safe among friends. But we’re not home, unless your last name is Frankenstein. Just as Videodrome cried out “Long live the new flesh,” Crimes of the Future declares “Surgery is the new sex,” and we’re all going to have to deal with that as best as we see fit.

Crimes of the Future (2022) is Recommended If You Like: Classic David Cronenberg (He’s back, baby!)

Grade: 4 out of 5 Organs

‘The Bob’s Burgers Movie’ is Here to Ask: How Can You Possibly Resist Seeing the Belcher Clan on the Big Screen?

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The Bob’s Burgers Movie (CREDIT:
20th Century Studios/Screenshot)

Starring: H. Jon Benjamin, John Roberts, Dan Mintz, Eugene Mirman, Kristen Schaal, Larry Murphy, Kevin Kline, Zach Galifianakis, David Wain, Gary Cole, Sam Seder, Aziz Ansari, David Herman, Brian Huskey, Jenny Slate, Ron Lynch, Stephanie Beatriz, Nicole Byer

Directors: Loren Bouchard and Bernard Derriman

Running Time: 102 Minutes

Rating: PG-13 for Some Surprisingly Scary Situations

Release Date: May 27, 2022 (Theaters)

Has it really been 12 seasons and over 200 episodes of Bob’s Burgers already? It somehow still occupies that “New Show” headspace in the Media Consumption Lobe of my brain, and yet an entire generation has now been raised by the Belcher crew. However long it’s lasted, this delightfully quirky animated Fox standby remains a reliable AND exciting part of my viewing routine. It’s a perfect way to spend a half hour on a Sunday evening (or the next Monday morning, or sometime later in the week when Peak TV obligations are really piling up). Just as middle child Tina still goes crazy over butts after all these years, so too am I eternally jazzed about the prospect of a big screen Belcher adventure as if it were the first time I were ever going to the theater. As long as it stays true to its underdog self, then I and legions of other loyal fans will be satisfied.

What’s profoundly striking about The Bob’s Burgers Movie is how much it doesn’t differ from a typical episode, beyond the stretched-out running time. Yes, the screen is a little wider, and the animation is a little more high-definition. But there’s no big-name stunt cameos or any trips across the universe. Instead, the whole thing is confined to a few of the typical locations in the same old anonymous East Coast beach town with the regular voice cast doing what they’ve always done.

What is different is that the stakes are a little higher. The family restaurant is the closest it’s ever been to bankruptcy, Tina’s ready to ask longtime crush Jimmy Pesto Jr. if he’ll be her summer boyfriend, the danger at hand is legitimately life-threatening, and there are some wonderfully go-for-broke musical numbers. But once again, these are motifs that have already come up multiple times on the show, so it’s only mild heightening. True, it’s not every day that a giant sinkhole opens up in front of Bob’s Burgers and makes it basically impossible for customers to enter. Nor is it every day that skeletal remains are found in front of the restaurant, and in a giant sinkhole no less. And that is what happens in the movie, as it sets off a juvenile murder investigation and some renegade burger cart hawking on the boardwalk. To the uninitiated, that might indeed sound like something wonderfully out-of-the-ordinary. But this is an adaptation of a show that just pulled off an ambitious Blade Runner homage in its most recent season finale. I’m not complaining about this familiarity; instead, I’m happily listing all the ways that The Bob’s Burgers Movie feels like home.

So, the first big-screen adventure of one of my favorite animated families is far from mind-blowing, but as I walked out of the theater, I had this thought: wouldn’t it be lovely if this became a new annual tradition? On the weekend after the latest season finale, we always get a new Bob’s Burgers movie. We spend most of the year getting our patty-bun-and-topping fill at home, and then we commune with our fellow burgerholics out in the wild, and maybe introduce a few new friends and family to the routine each time. Isn’t that a world you’d like to live in? Isn’t that a world you’d like your children to live in? We’ve already had so many Burgers of the Day, now it’s time for the Burgers of the Year.

The Bob’s Burgers Movie is Recommended If You Like: Food Puns and Thick Buns

Grade: 3.5 out of 5 Burgers of the Day

How Many Men Does It Take to Man Up ‘Men’?

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“Men!” (CREDIT: A24)

Starring: Jessie Buckley, Rory Kinnear, Paapa Essiedu, Gayle Rankin

Director: Alex Garland

Running Time: 100 Minutes

Rating: R

Release Date: May 20, 2022 (Theaters)

Men, men, men, men, manly men, men, men… I’m sorry if any reference to Two and a Half Men gives any of my readers immediate stress nightmares, but I couldn’t get that repetitive theme song out of my head in anticipation of seeing the Alex Garland-written-and-directed Men. So that’s what’s setting the tone of this review, and we’re simply going to have to deal with it. I’m a musically-oriented person, and that’s just the way it is. If you name your movie “Men,” then I’m going to get a song about men stuck in my head! Thankfully, though, that earworm vibe is sort of appropriate. It’s kind of what the widow Harper Marlowe (Jessie Buckley) experiences herself in a much darker fashion. So in a roundabout sort of way, my subconscious knew exactly what to do to take care of me. It definitely helped to process that climactic “birth” scene.

Grade: Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhh, Man!

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