Movie Reviews: Making a Sentence Out of Two Titles Edition: The ‘Smurfs’ and ‘I Know What You Did Last Summer’

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We Smurfed What You Smurfed Last Smurf (CREDIT: Paramount Animation; Brook Rushton/Columbia Pictures)

Smurfs

Starring: Rihanna, James Corden, John Goodman, Nick Offerman, JP Karliak, Dan Levy, Amy Sedaris, Natasha Lyonne, Sandra Oh, Jimmy Kimmel, Octavia Spencer, Nick Kroll, Hannah Waddingham, Alex Winter, Maya Erskine, Kurt Russell, Xolo Maridueña, Hugo Miller, Chris Miller, Billie Lourd, Marshmello, Spencer X, Chrisy Prynoski

Director: Chris Miller

Running Time: 92 Minutes

Rating: PG for Smurf Action and Some Rude Smurfin’

Release Date: July 18, 2025 (Theaters)

I Know What You Did Last Summer

Starring: Chase Sui Wonders, Madelyn Cline, Jonah Hauer-King, Tyriq Withers, Sarah Pidgeon, Jennifer Love Hewitt, Freddie Prinze Jr., Billy Campbell, Gabriette Bechtel

Director: Jennifer Kaytin Robinson

Running Time: 111 Minutes

Rating: R for Twisting, Poking, and Hanging, Plus a Few Seductions and a Couple of Joints

Release Date: July 18, 2025 (Theaters)

A couple of decades-old franchises are getting revived at the multiplex this weekend. That sentence could apply to just about any weekend from the past 25 years or so. But in case you’re reading this review from the future (or the past), the weekend I’m specifically referring to right now is the one that begins on July 18, 2025. And the movies I’m talking about are Smurfs (no “the”) and the same-titled lega-sequel I Know What You Did Last Summer. Is there any way both of these movies could possibly appeal to the same person?! Let’s use myself as a test case.

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This One Weird Trick Helped Me Watch ‘Lilo & Stitch’ (2025), ‘Thunderbolts*,’ and ‘Bring Her Back’

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They brought Stitch back! And he brought the Thunder (CREDIT: Ingvar Kenne/A24; Disney/Screenshot; Marvel/Screenshot)

Lilo & Stitch (2025)

Starring: Maia Kealoha, Chris Sanders, Sydney Elizabeth Agudong, Zach Galifianakis, Billy Magnussen, Courtney B. Vance, Hannah Waddingham, Kaipo Dudoit, Tia Carrere, Amy Hill

Director: Dean Fleischer Camp

Running Time: 108 Minutes

Rating: PG

Release Date: May 23, 2025 (Theaters)

Thunderbolts*

Starring: Florence Pugh, Sebastian Stan, Wyatt Russell, Olga Kurylenko, Lewis Pullman, Julia Louis-Dreyfus, David Harbour, Hannah John-Kamen, Geraldine Viswanathan, Chris Bauer, Wendell Pierce

Director: Jake Schreier

Running Time: 126 Minutes

Rating: PG-13

Release Date: May 2, 2025 (Theaters)

Bring Her Back

Starring: Billy Barratt, Sally Hawkins, Sora Wong, Jonah Wren Phillips, Sally-Anne Upton, Stephen Phillips, Mischa Heywood

Directors: Danny and Michael Philippou

Running Time: 104 Minutes

Rating: R

Release Date: May 30, 2025 (Theaters)

Okay, wow, I just noticed something weird. Or maybe not that weird. And maybe millions of other folks have already noticed this before me. But that doesn’t mean it’s not weird!

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Please, One More Reckoning Before We Go! Okay, But This is ‘Mission: Impossible – The Final Reckoning’

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The Impossible Man (CREDIT: Paramount Pictures and Skydance)

Starring: Tom Cruise, Hayley Atwell, Ving Rhames, Simon Pegg, Esai Morales, Pom Klementieff, Henry Czerny, Holt McCallany, Janet McTeer, Nick Offerman, Hannah Waddingham, Tramell Tillman, Angela Bassett, Shea Whigham, Greg Tarzan Davis, Charles Parnell, Mark Gatiss, Rolf Saxon, Lucy Tulugarjuk

Director: Christopher McQuarrie

Running Time: 169 Minutes

Rating: PG-13 for Near-Death Experiences

Release Date: May 23, 2025 (Theaters)

What’s It About?: It’s all come down to this. All those previous impossible missions that Ethan Hunt (Tom Cruise) pulled off over the decades? We thought they were more or less self-contained. But instead, it turns out that they were all part of a vast global conspiracy to sow widespread confusion and establish a new world order. This is set to be established by an artificial intelligence entity known as, in fact, “The Entity.” It is apparently going to accomplish this by infecting every connected device on the planet and then – as far as I can tell – launching every nuclear weapon and also just generally making everyone distrustful of everyone else. Some guy named Gabriel (Esai Morales) is trying to usher The Entity along to its destiny, while Ethan and his IMF crew attempt to do the opposite with their precision timing and the latest batch of stakes-raising, death-defying stunts.

What Made an Impression?: They’ve Got So Much to Say: The Final Reckoning definitely gives off end-of-the-series vibes, although I’m sure Cruise and the rest of the creative team are open to future installments for as long as he remains ageless. In the meantime, though, this chapter definitely closes the book on something. And it’s a big ol’ slam, clocking in at nearly three hours. Those minutes are filled with a trio of major set pieces, and plenty of talking in between about how those set pieces will be accomplished. And when I say “plenty,” I mean, “oh so very many plenty.” I really don’t think there needed to be this much dialogue for such an action-oriented flick. That’s not to say that the Mission: Impossible flicks ought to be silent (although that might be kind of cool if they were), but I personally would have advised a sleeker design.
Hey, Remember Those Times Way Back When?: When it comes to long-running action series, M:I is kind of the antithesis of Fast & Furious, insofar as the former sheds several of its supporting characters in between installments without any fanfare, whereas the latter seems to just collecting them for perpetuity until it’s bursting at the seams. To be fair, there are still a few IMF mainstays hanging around, although Ethan’s female counterparts have a tendency to disappear no matter how beloved they are by fans. The Final Reckoning takes a somewhat different approach by explicitly drawing upon some of the earlier entries in ways that would have felt impossible just a few years earlier. And that’s kind of thrilling for those of us whose favorite M:I chapters seemed like they’d been completely forgotten.
Timely Gobbledygook: Cautionary tales about artificial intelligence are so hot right now. But frankly The Entity doesn’t have anything to do with any real-life A.I. On the contrary, it’s just a profoundly vague MacGuffin. Or should I call it the villain? Can the MacGuffin be the villain? I think it is in this case. Anyway, it’s all just an excuse for the most baroque modern blockbuster action around, so whatever.

Mission: Impossible – The Final Reckoning is Recommended If You Like: Parking your butt while the obsessive man does his thing

Grade: 3.5 out of 5 Entities

‘The Garfield Movie’ is Like 100 Tons of the Silliest Lasagna You’ve Ever Consumed

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This review was written on a Monday. (CREDIT: DNEG Animation)

Starring: Chris Pratt, Samuel L. Jackson, Hannah Waddingham, Ving Rhames, Nicholas Hoult, Cecily Strong, Harvey Guillén, Brett Goldstein, Bowen Yang, Janelle James, Snoop Dogg

Director: Mark Dindal

Running Time: 101 Minutes

Rating: PG for Kitty Calamities

Release Date: May 24, 2024 (Theaters)

What’s It About?: Everyone’s favorite lasagna-loving feline is back on the big screen, and this time, it’s called… The Garfield Movie! (I guess all those other cinematic outings were merely “A” Garfield Movie?) Anyway, now he’s voiced by Chris Pratt, and his gluttony is fueled by his owner Jon Arbuckle’s (Nicholas Hoult) seemingly limitless credit card and all the food delivery apps he can get his paws. He’s pretty happy just lounging around devouring his daily feasts with his beagle buddy Odie (Harvey Guillén). But then his absentee dad Vic (Samuel L. Jackson) shows up out of the blue to wrangle him into a hero’s journey, as they attempt to heist some milk from a farm to square away Vic’s debt with Jinx (Hannah Waddingham), the devilish crime boss Persian cat.

What Made an Impression?: Slingshot All Day: I’m not going to call out a cartoon for its unrealistic portrayal of physics. After all, part of the advantages of this medium is that it doesn’t have to be bound by the laws of science in the same way that live action movies are. That comes into play with a series of train-based set pieces, as Garfield fails to board one of the cars cleanly and ends up getting bounced around by a ridiculous series of objects providing an inordinate amount of thrust. I wasn’t scandalized by the lack of respect for the natural world, but I was befuddled. Perhaps if I had been in a sillier mood, I would have been more ready to throw out a laugh or several.
Wait, What World is This?: The plot of The Garfield Movie isn’t much to write about (or at least it’s not much that I’m interested in writing about), so instead I’m focusing on the weird details that made me go, what the heck is the context here? To wit: at one point during Garfield’s adventures getting tossed hither and thither, he flies by a giant balloon float version of… himself. So does that mean that this movie is taking place on Thanksgiving? And that Garfield is famous in this world as an actual real-world somewhat-anthropomorphic kitty?
Also, what’s the deal with all the blatant product placement? I guess Garfield is just a classic capitalist consumer with a bad case of brand loyalty. Perhaps you won’t notice these details as much as I did. Or perhaps you will notice them but will find them amusing. The people in my screening who were cracking up the most appeared to be in their twenties or thirties, so you apparently don’t need to be a kid for these shenanigans to work. But you probably do need to hate Mondays and LOVE telling people that you hate Mondays.

The Garfield Movie is Recommended If You: Believe That Mass Quantities of Food Are the Most Hilarious Thing Ever

Grade: 2.5 out of 5 Tabbies

‘The Fall Guy’ is a Love Letter to Stunt Performers (Emphasis on the Love)

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Fall in May (CREDIT: Universal Pictures)

Starring: Ryan Gosling, Emily Blunt, Aaron Taylor-Johnson, Hannah Waddingham, Winston Duke, Teresa Palmer, Stephanie Hsu

Director: David Leitch

Running Time: 126 Minutes

Rating: PG-13 for Blank Gunfire, Real Gunfire, Prop Swords, Real Falls

Release Date: May 3, 2024 (Theaters)

What’s It About?: At the beginning of The Fall Guy, stuntman Colt Seavers (Ryan Gosling) takes a great fall. But unlike Humpty Dumpty, the folks around him are ultimately able to put him back together again. Although he’s certainly not without his scars, both physical and emotional. A serious on-set injury has prompted him to disappear from his Hollywood career and his girlfriend Jody Moreno (Emily Blunt). But just when he thinks he’s out for good, his old producer Gail Meyer (Hannah Waddingham) pulls him back in with an offer he can’t refuse: head Down Under to Sydney to become the stunt double once again for major star Tom Ryder (Aaron Taylor-Johnson) in Metalstorm, Jody’s epic sci-fi romance directorial debut. But there’s also a side mission in the offing, as Gail tells Colt that the real reason he’s here is to track down the missing Tom and bring him back to set. So Colt straps in his mouthguard and turns into a special agent as various versions of Kiss’ “I Was Made for Lovin’ You” keeps playing during all of the most pivotal moments.

What Made an Impression?: A Feature-Length Campaign: The Fall Guy is based on a 1980s TV show starring Lee Majors about stunt performers who are bounty hunters on the side, and it’s directed by David Leitch, a former stuntman and stunt coordinator himself. It’s no surprise then that Leitch has honored his brethren by what is essentially a two-hour video editorial arguing in favor of a stunt category at the Academy Awards. The stunt community and plenty of film lovers have been pushing that idea for years, and with the recent announcement of the addition of a Casting Oscar, can stunts be far behind? After watching The Fall Guy, it’s impossible not to appreciate the contributions of stunt workers on both a technical and an artistic level. It’s also impossible not to recognize them as whole human beings with fascinating interior lives who deserve to be recognized as much as anybody else.
A Mature Series of Conversations: Emily Blunt is one of Earth’s most captivating actors, and Ryan Gosling is endlessly charming, so it’s no surprise that Colt and Jody’s love story is filled with wit, honest longing, and karaoke. Furthermore, I was pleased that it reminded me of Blunt and Matt Damon in 2011’s The Adjustment Bureau, but whereas that earlier romance pulled off the sublime feelings of a fateful first encounter, The Fall Guy sparks with the maturity of a shared history. Colt and Jody are thoughtful and caring towards each other, and despite the pain of their separation, neither of them can quite fathom why they spent so much time apart. And neither can we, as they slip so easily into their natural roles of each other’s inspirations. Metalstorm and Tom’s absence are making everything much more stressful than they surely wanted their reunion to be, but it’s often the high-stress episodes that deepen our relationships for the better.

The Fall Guy is Recommended If You Like: Self-aware split-screen, Cars on fire, Hearts on fire

Grade: 3.5 out of 5 Stunts