Please, One More Reckoning Before We Go! Okay, But This is ‘Mission: Impossible – The Final Reckoning’

May 14, 2025

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The Impossible Man (CREDIT: Paramount Pictures and Skydance)

Starring: Tom Cruise, Hayley Atwell, Ving Rhames, Simon Pegg, Esai Morales, Pom Klementieff, Henry Czerny, Holt McCallany, Janet McTeer, Nick Offerman, Hannah Waddingham, Tramell Tillman, Angela Bassett, Shea Whigham, Greg Tarzan Davis, Charles Parnell, Mark Gatiss, Rolf Saxon, Lucy Tulugarjuk

Director: Christopher McQuarrie

Running Time: 169 Minutes

Rating: PG-13 for Near-Death Experiences

Release Date: May 23, 2025 (Theaters)

What’s It About?: It’s all come down to this. All those previous impossible missions that Ethan Hunt (Tom Cruise) pulled off over the decades? We thought they were more or less self-contained. But instead, it turns out that they were all part of a vast global conspiracy to sow widespread confusion and establish a new world order. This is set to be established by an artificial intelligence entity known as, in fact, “The Entity.” It is apparently going to accomplish this by infecting every connected device on the planet and then – as far as I can tell – launching every nuclear weapon and also just generally making everyone distrustful of everyone else. Some guy named Gabriel (Esai Morales) is trying to usher The Entity along to its destiny, while Ethan and his IMF crew attempt to do the opposite with their precision timing and the latest batch of stakes-raising, death-defying stunts.

What Made an Impression?: They’ve Got So Much to Say: The Final Reckoning definitely gives off end-of-the-series vibes, although I’m sure Cruise and the rest of the creative team are open to future installments for as long as he remains ageless. In the meantime, though, this chapter definitely closes the book on something. And it’s a big ol’ slam, clocking in at nearly three hours. Those minutes are filled with a trio of major set pieces, and plenty of talking in between about how those set pieces will be accomplished. And when I say “plenty,” I mean, “oh so very many plenty.” I really don’t think there needed to be this much dialogue for such an action-oriented flick. That’s not to say that the Mission: Impossible flicks ought to be silent (although that might be kind of cool if they were), but I personally would have advised a sleeker design.
Hey, Remember Those Times Way Back When?: When it comes to long-running action series, M:I is kind of the antithesis of Fast & Furious, insofar as the former sheds several of its supporting characters in between installments without any fanfare, whereas the latter seems to just collecting them for perpetuity until it’s bursting at the seams. To be fair, there are still a few IMF mainstays hanging around, although Ethan’s female counterparts have a tendency to disappear no matter how beloved they are by fans. The Final Reckoning takes a somewhat different approach by explicitly drawing upon some of the earlier entries in ways that would have felt impossible just a few years earlier. And that’s kind of thrilling for those of us whose favorite M:I chapters seemed like they’d been completely forgotten.
Timely Gobbledygook: Cautionary tales about artificial intelligence are so hot right now. But frankly The Entity doesn’t have anything to do with any real-life A.I. On the contrary, it’s just a profoundly vague MacGuffin. Or should I call it the villain? Can the MacGuffin be the villain? I think it is in this case. Anyway, it’s all just an excuse for the most baroque modern blockbuster action around, so whatever.

Mission: Impossible – The Final Reckoning is Recommended If You Like: Parking your butt while the obsessive man does his thing

Grade: 3.5 out of 5 Entities

‘The Wild Robot’ Asks if a Machine Can Access Its Parental Instinct for a Goose

September 25, 2024

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Does she have the programming to be a mother? Let’s find out! (CREDIT: DreamWorks)

Starring: Lupita Nyong’o, Pedro Pascal, Kit Connor, Catherine O’Hara, Bill Nighy, Stephanie Hsu, Mark Hamill, Matt Berry, Ving Rhames

Director: Chris Sanders

Running Time: 102 Minutes

Rating: PG for Fiery Action and Mild Animal Mortality

Release Date: September 27, 2024 (Theaters)

What’s It About?: A service robot washes ashore on an island dense with all sorts of animal residents. But this metal creature is supposed to serve humans! But not to worry, as ROZZUM Unit 7134, aka Roz (Lupita Nyong’o) can learn new languages with no trouble at all, so soon enough she’s able to communicate with all the local wildlife in their native tongues. That certainly comes in handy, because in her tireless efforts to offer assistance, she accidentally destroys a goose nest, save for one egg. And when it hatches, the little gosling (voiced by Boone Storme as a baby and Kit Connor when he grows up) imprints on Roz as if she’s his mother. She calls him Brightbill, and she must then prepare him for the upcoming winter migration, which may just require some emotional bonding that isn’t exactly in her programming, though a sojourn in the wilderness might just change that.

What Made an Impression?: What is Love?: Early in The Wild Robot, Roz matter-of-factly admits, “I do not have the programming to be a mother.” Plenty of human mothers have said some variation on this statement, but their kids turned out okay. And maybe non-human animal mothers have also said this in their own animal languages. An opossum voiced by Catherine O’Hara with a bunch of babies hanging onto her fur certainly admits as much to Roz. But are emotions and genuine affection only the domain of the living? Certainly not on the big screen, as Roz is just the latest in a long line of fictional synthetic creatures to transcend their programming in the name of love. But really, she is just following her prime directive of dedicated service to its most logical and satisfying conclusion.
Keeping It Foxy: I kind of want to leave this review rather succinct and just end on that note of love. But I also feel compelled to at least mention the #2 critter on the call sheet, as Roz strikes up an unlikely friendship with an otherwise defiantly independent fox named Fink. His mischievous vibe is similar to that of a certain blue hedgehog, which is why I spent the whole movie thinking that he was voiced by Ben Schwartz, when in actuality he was voiced by Mr. Mandalorian himself, Pedro Pascal. So good job embodying the impish spirit of Mr. Schwartz, Pedro! Whether on purpose or by total coincidence, it was absolutely the right choice.

The Wild Robot is Recommended If You Like: A.I. Artificial Intelligence, Babe, Homeward Bound

Grade: 4 out of 5 Universal Dynamics

‘The Garfield Movie’ is Like 100 Tons of the Silliest Lasagna You’ve Ever Consumed

May 21, 2024

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This review was written on a Monday. (CREDIT: DNEG Animation)

Starring: Chris Pratt, Samuel L. Jackson, Hannah Waddingham, Ving Rhames, Nicholas Hoult, Cecily Strong, Harvey Guillén, Brett Goldstein, Bowen Yang, Janelle James, Snoop Dogg

Director: Mark Dindal

Running Time: 101 Minutes

Rating: PG for Kitty Calamities

Release Date: May 24, 2024 (Theaters)

What’s It About?: Everyone’s favorite lasagna-loving feline is back on the big screen, and this time, it’s called… The Garfield Movie! (I guess all those other cinematic outings were merely “A” Garfield Movie?) Anyway, now he’s voiced by Chris Pratt, and his gluttony is fueled by his owner Jon Arbuckle’s (Nicholas Hoult) seemingly limitless credit card and all the food delivery apps he can get his paws. He’s pretty happy just lounging around devouring his daily feasts with his beagle buddy Odie (Harvey Guillén). But then his absentee dad Vic (Samuel L. Jackson) shows up out of the blue to wrangle him into a hero’s journey, as they attempt to heist some milk from a farm to square away Vic’s debt with Jinx (Hannah Waddingham), the devilish crime boss Persian cat.

What Made an Impression?: Slingshot All Day: I’m not going to call out a cartoon for its unrealistic portrayal of physics. After all, part of the advantages of this medium is that it doesn’t have to be bound by the laws of science in the same way that live action movies are. That comes into play with a series of train-based set pieces, as Garfield fails to board one of the cars cleanly and ends up getting bounced around by a ridiculous series of objects providing an inordinate amount of thrust. I wasn’t scandalized by the lack of respect for the natural world, but I was befuddled. Perhaps if I had been in a sillier mood, I would have been more ready to throw out a laugh or several.
Wait, What World is This?: The plot of The Garfield Movie isn’t much to write about (or at least it’s not much that I’m interested in writing about), so instead I’m focusing on the weird details that made me go, what the heck is the context here? To wit: at one point during Garfield’s adventures getting tossed hither and thither, he flies by a giant balloon float version of… himself. So does that mean that this movie is taking place on Thanksgiving? And that Garfield is famous in this world as an actual real-world somewhat-anthropomorphic kitty?
Also, what’s the deal with all the blatant product placement? I guess Garfield is just a classic capitalist consumer with a bad case of brand loyalty. Perhaps you won’t notice these details as much as I did. Or perhaps you will notice them but will find them amusing. The people in my screening who were cracking up the most appeared to be in their twenties or thirties, so you apparently don’t need to be a kid for these shenanigans to work. But you probably do need to hate Mondays and LOVE telling people that you hate Mondays.

The Garfield Movie is Recommended If You: Believe That Mass Quantities of Food Are the Most Hilarious Thing Ever

Grade: 2.5 out of 5 Tabbies

It’s the End of the World as We Know It, and ‘Mission: Impossible – Dead Reckoning Part One’ Feels Fine

July 5, 2023

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Which one’s Dead and which one’s Reckoning? (CREDIT: Paramount Pictures and Skydance)

Starring: Tom Cruise, Hayley Atwell, Esai Morales, Ving Rhames, Simon Pegg, Rebecca Ferguson, Vanessa Kirby, Henry Czerny, Pom Klementieff, Shea Whigham, Greg Tarzan Davis

Director: Christopher McQuarrie

Running Time: 163 Minutes

Rating: PG-13 for A Reckless Relationship with Gravity

Release Date: July 12, 2023 (Theaters)

What’s It About?: This might just be the most impossible mission yet! That may sound like hyperbole for a series that’s famously death-defying, but honestly it lives up to the hype. Ethan Hunt (the freakishly indefatigable Tom Cruise) and his pared-down IMF team must somehow figure out how to dispatch a new enemy that threatens to wipe out humanity as we know it by reverting society to an analog dystopia. Of course, that premise is just a setup for the shameless stunts and sizzling globetrotting. In addition to this all-encompassing terror, Ethan is also being chased down by some law enforcement types who aren’t so sure he should be able to operate without impunity anymore.

What Made an Impression?: What’s All This Now?: The Mission: Impossible series combines elements of espionage, big budgets extravaganza, and practical stunt work, all genres that are notorious for being accompanied by nonsensical plots. And Dead Reckoning Part One might just be the nonsensical one yet! As far as I could tell, the enemy wasn’t exactly human, but it could take human form. Or maybe I misunderstood that. But I don’t think I did! The opening scene provided a very thorough explanation, after all. Anyway, I’m pretty sure that Esai Morales plays the villain in question, but confusion still lingered with me by the end. If you find yourself just as confused as I was, you can still enjoy the movie, though you’ll also probably find yourself mulling it over more than you need to.
New and Old, Which One’s New?: In terms of character carryover, Mission: Impossible is kind of like the hall-of-mirrors version of Fast & Furious, if some of those mirrors were covered by blackout blinds. In addition to Cruise as Hunt, you can rely on Ving Rhames and Simon Pegg to be there as his regular IMF buddies. But on the flip side, you could have a love interest like M:I 3‘s Michelle Monagahn just unceremoniously disappear. There’s also a little bit of room for new favorites like Rebecca Ferguson and Vanessa Kirby to remain after their initial appearances, and for new recruits like Hayley Atwell to seamlessly find their place. And we can even reach way back for originals like Henry Czerny who were there in the beginning but have taken most of the sequels off, and you can be tricked into thinking that they’ve been there all along. Basically, the casting in this franchise is a magic act.
So Much Delivered, So Much More to Come: But let’s finally get down to the bread and butter. The best setpieces all involve a climactic train ride. There’s a cliffside jump to arrive on the train, fights within and outside the train, and a desperate scramble to stay alive and not fall off the train. Before that choo-choo checks in, you might actually wonder what’s taking so long for Dead Reckoning to go for broke as much as usual. But once it does, the massively wound ball of tension lets loose and doesn’t give you any time to catch your breath. And this is just Part One! A nearly three-hour opening chapter, after that. (Or the first half of the seventh chapter, from another point of view.) This is just the latest 2023 blockbuster that forces you to wait another year for the end of the story, but you won’t feel deprived. Dead Reckoning Part One can stand fully on its own, and quite frankly, you’ll need all those extra months to recover.

Mission: Impossible – Dead Reckoning Part One is Recommended If You Like: Saying “Huh?” and “Woo-hoo!” at the same time

Grade: 3.5 out of 5 Trains

This Is a Movie Review: Mission: Impossible – Fallout

August 12, 2018

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CREDIT: Paramount Pictures

Mission: Impossible – Fallout is to Ethan Hunt what Spectre is to James Bond, but not that (transparently) insane and mostly successful. But what I really want to talk about is this idea that Hunt is irreplaceable. The conjecture that there is only person for the most dangerous jobs in the world is certainly compelling, but is it healthy? If we’re talking about how it applies to reality, certainly not. For the sake of the world and for the sake of their personal lives, experts and superheroes should have backups and successors in place. But when we’re talking about the cinematic medium, the calculus is a little different … or is it?

M:I isn’t the only spy and/or insane stunt franchise that has been killing it in the past 20 years, which means we’ve got our backups. And when Tom Cruise finally calls it quits (in a billion years or so), maybe a worthy Ethan Hunt successor will somehow run into our hearts. In the universe where the IMF exists, Hunt really shouldn’t place the entire weight of the world on his shoulders. But since this world is a fictional place, it’s working as it’s supposed to.

I give Mission: Impossible – Fallout 4 Cliffhangs out of 5 Shifting Allegiances.