We have a clip.

Cold Opening – On the Record with Greta van Susteren
This was a distressingly bad cold open.  Kristen’s Greta van Susteren has never really been that amusing, but Darrell’s Donald always has been.  The Donald may be one of his three best impressions, but this time it hardly was.  He seemed out of practice.  He couldn’t even consistently say “hyuge” in that patented Donald style. C

Katy Perry’s Monologue
There were a few “jokes” about Katy Perry’s persona, but no real premise built around them.  This monologue was a mess, but a hot mess. C+

J-Pop America Fun Time Now
I never would have expected this to be a post-monologue leadoff sketch.  Here’s the deal: adding a bunch of r, d, and n sounds to the end of words is not Japanese, nor is it good comedy.  I guess this was meant to make fun of faux-Japanese, but, uh, yeesh. C-

The Apocalypse
Before this trailer parody revealed its full premise, it was amusing enough in how it accurately captured how Drew Barrymore, Ashton Kutcher, Philip Seymour Hoffman, and Kirsten Dunst would act in one of these star-studded romantic comedies.  Then this went to a list of absurd items, which SNL relies upon a lot these days, and with good reason, because it is perhaps their most consistently successful current strategy. B+

Kalle
Here’s what I would like to congratulate “Kalle” for: I knew exactly where it was going, but it still managed to make me laugh, thanks to its adept execution.  When Katy surmised that Kalle would go home to a depressing cat-filled apartment, I said out loud, “We have a clip,” and then when Kalle said it, it was still brilliant. B+

Digital Short: Best Friends
I did not recognize Matt Damon.  I knew that the drug addict was someone that I knew, but Matt did not quite look like himself.  Anyway, jolly good. B

Doggie Duty
SNL has been trying to recapture that “Bunny Business” magic, with diminishing returns each time.  This one was a little half-assed.  Amazingly, Katy (as Florence Welch!) provided the best impression. B-

Robyn performs “Call Your Girlfriend”
As far as SNL musical guests go, Robyn is the best dancer since at least Chris Brown, and her dancing is much quirkier than Chris’s.  She also has the perfect voice for dance-pop. A-

Weekend Update
-The Jokes: At least decent efforts from Seth two weeks in a row.  That’s gotta be some sort of record.  Rick Perry appearing on next season’s Apprentice was the best joke, and the Contagion coming true punchline also made me laugh. B
-The Segments: -Rebecca Larue: Another Weekend Update, another new Kristen Wiig character.  I’ve got to admire her for always trying out new material, which seemed to be the main point of this bit. B-
-Captain Steve Rogers/Alec Baldwin: I’m not really sure how to grade this segment.  Baldwin wasn’t exactly being playful in poking fun at American Airlines, and judging by the facts of the incident, I’m not so sure that he shouldn’t have been apologetic.  He did get some clever jibes in there, and it seemed to mean to be all in good fun, but it reeked of self-indulgence.  As far as comedy goes, B-
-Stefon: And Stefon remains as classic as ever by sticking in a few surprising details within the standard framework.  The reference of the Republican candidates was unexpected, and I believe the mention of “Spicy” was the first callback to a club that Stefon had introduced in an earlier episode.  And who would have thought Spud Webb (pulling double duty, that is) would be the stimulus for Bill to corpse? A

Royal Pregnancy
There we go again with the Queen and Prince Philip as gangsters – painfully nonsensical, but occasionally amusing.  Katy as Pippa was actually the best part of this sketch.  Her English accent actually sounded pretty good, probably because she was basically doing an impression of her husband. B-

Politics Nation
I have trouble believing that Al Sharpton is completely inept at talking and recognizing which camera is being used on his TV show.  I can, though, believe that he is often enough inept in these areas, and Kenan was just having a hell of a time being allowed to say his lines however he wanted to.  Taran as Jim VandeHei seemed slightly amused, as opposed to annoyed, that Sharpton kept screwing up his name, which was a nice touch. B+

Robyn performs “Dancing on My Own”
If you want a female empowerment anthem that is fun and danceable – but still actually empowering – then Robyn is your gal. B+

One Magical Night
This is the type of role that Katy should have been playing all night: someone who seems basically normal, but turns out to have very specific oddities.  The timing was perfect.  Hurray for rehearsal!  The ending was a bit too disturbing, but at least there was an ending. B+

Overall
This episode featured this, that, and the other thing.  There was no one defining characteristic, which was surprising, because usually when the host  is not primarily an actor or comedian, the episode is mostly built around the persona of the host, for better or worse.  But Katy seemed to be fine with playing whatever roles were available for her.  Therefore, this episode lived and died by its material, and some of the material was quite strong, and some of it was quite bad.

And a big Vanda-hi back at you!