For its first half hour or so, Irrational Man consists mainly of the masturbatory philosophizing that it rails against, just a different form. Luckily, it kicks into gear when its premise springs into action. It is not the first film to attempt to justify a major crime, nor the best, but it is gratifyingly self-assured.
This Is a (Quickie) Movie Review: Irrational Man
August 12, 2015
Cinema, Movie Reviews Irrational Man Leave a comment
This Is a Movie Review: Terminator Genisys
August 5, 2015
Cinema, Movie Reviews Alan Taylor, Arnold Schwarzenegger, Courtney B. Vance, Emilia Clarke, J.K. Simmons, Jai Courtney, Jason Clarke, Matt Smith, Terminator, Terminator Genisys 2 Comments
Terminator Genisys basically ignores the third and fourth movies in the series, but it should be noted that 3 and 4 do not really grapple with their predecessors, at least not very meaningfully. T3 backtracks on the message of T2, while Salvation merely fills in the blanks in a way that mostly stands on its own. Genisys, meanwhile, crisscrosses 1 and 2, while new machinations try to prevent or delay the victory or defeat of Skynet. It does not completely stand as its own thing, but there is so much thrown together (mostly gracefully), that it works as something. It manages to be fascinating, at least in an academic sense.
Sarah Connor and Kyle Reese’s interactions are colored by the knowledge of destiny, as they grapple with how to or how not to fulfill the roles that have already been set for them. It is a fairly effective treatise on the nature of stories in which the characters “know” what they are “supposed” to do. Emilia Clarke and Jai Courtney’s performances are not much more than serviceable, but maybe that is the point. Maybe in being locked into their roles, they cannot add too much extra color.
The most consistent draw of this series remains The Terminator himself. Arnold Schwarzenegger has been on a bit of a hot streak in finding relaxed, playful subtleties in his performances, and that continues here, as his awkward cyborg smiles are just exactly right. Also, J.K. Simmons shows up as a beat cop who gets caught up in everything, and he is completely superfluous but very much welcome.
This Is a (Quickie) Movie Review: Magic Mike XXL
July 28, 2015
Cinema, Movie Reviews Adam Rodriguez, Amber Heard, Andie MacDowell, Channing Tatum, Gabriel Iglesias, Gregory Jacobs, Jada Pinkett Smith, Joe Manganiello, Kevin Nash, Magic Mike, Magic Mike XXL, Matt Bomer 1 Comment
If the Amber Heard subplot had been scuttled, Magic Mike XXL would have been all set to go. To be fair, though, her last scene, in which she is gyrated upon by Mike at the stripper convention, loosens up that stiffness.
The top highlights belong to Joe Manganiello. Of course, we have all already heard about his gas station convenience store performance to “I Want It That Way,” and it is worth the hype. But watch out for the transition from Bruno Mars’ “Marry You” to Nine Inch Nails’ “Closer” in the finale and the discussion about how every inch of BD Richie fit in Andie MacDowell’s “glass slipper.”
This Is a (Quickie) Movie Review: Spy
June 23, 2015
Cinema, Movie Reviews Spy Leave a comment

In the beginning of Spy, it makes sense that everyone underestimates Susan Cooper. She’s never been out in the field, and she does not look like the typical secret agent. But at a certain point, when her quick thinking and physical training gets her out of trouble for the umpteenth time, it is a little hard to believe that everyone has not noticed. But it also seems like everyone has noticed, whether or not they’ve said so. After all every major male character seems to have fallen in love with her by the end.
Since the message of Spy is so tangled, its success rests on the strength of its comedy. That aspect is rather mean-spirited, but understandably so, because the insults tend to come from some clearly terrible people. It would have added welcome depth if Rose Byrne’s Rayna Boyanov were more than cartoonishly evil, but she did relish yelling that she was surrounded by idiots.
This Is a (Quickie) Movie Review: Ex Machina
April 25, 2015
Cinema, Movie Reviews Ex Machina, Oscar Isaac dancing Leave a comment
Ex Machina posits that A.I. is most convincing when you can see that it is a machine and yet it still registers as human consciousness. This is also the formula of a certain strain of great magic: the magician explains the trick to the audience, but the illusion still stands. Accordingly, Ex Machina is interested in magic, what with the main characters thoroughly expositing their ruses. But who will prove to be the master of misdirection: A.I. impresario Nathan, his employee/mark Caleb, or shiny new robot Ava? The twists are predictable, but the exploration upon getting to them is deeply fascinating.
Oscar Isaac has given the best performance of the year so far, and not just because of this:
This Is a (Quickie) Movie Review: Unfriended
April 17, 2015
Cinema, Movie Reviews Nasty Movies, Screenlife, Unfriended 3 Comments
Unfriended, at heart, is a typical one-by-one mystery killer story. Ergo, it is not particularly scary. So when a horror movie is not very scary, it needs to be interesting. And boy, is it interesting. Essentially the entire running time takes place on an Apple laptop. With all the Chrome tabs, Skype windows, Spotify’s, Messenger’s, Recycle Bins, and desktop icons, I at first thought it was going to be exhausting, but then I soon remembered that I am used to all that.
It succeeds at relentlessly exploiting its killer premise and withholding information until the most effective moments. While I very much enjoyed it, it is not something I would jump at watching again, as all the characters are just terrible friends to each other. The best word to describe this movie is “nasty.” It’s a cautionary tale, a nasty movie for nasty people.
This Is a Movie Review: As Above, So Below
September 7, 2014
Cinema, Movie Reviews Leave a comment
As Above, So Below has one of the most unique horror premises in a while: a team of explorers go spelunking in the catacombs below Paris and as they enter rarely-explored sections, they discover that they might be in a portal to Hell, or something like it. Too bad it takes forever for the story to actually get around to exploring that premise. The lead spelunker is multilingual, multi-degreed Scarlett (Perdita Weeks), who is carrying on the work of her late father of finding the Philosopher’s Stone, a legendary substance said to have alchemical and life elixir powers. A prologue of Scarlet searching for clues in an Iranian cave suggests that the hellish nature of underground locations may not be limited to one place, as she sees a vision of a man hanging himself that serves as a bit of foreshadowing. Following this prologue is approximately 45 minutes of Scarlet and her crew in Paris figuring out how they are going to enter the catacombs, and it is just as boring as it sounds.
Much has been made of the fact that As Above, So Below is yet another in horror’s found-footage sub-genre, and the talk I have seen is generally bemoaning that there is yet another fake documentary in the arena. As Above would have worked perfectly fine without this gimmick, even though it actually does attempt some interesting techniques with it, such as placing mounted cameras on everyone’s cave headgear, which solves the problem of limited realistic camera angles. But, ultimately, this movie does not make sense as found-footage because there is no reason for this footage to be found, because (SPOILER ALERT) multiple characters survive and presumably hold onto the footage.
The failing of As Above, So Below is that all of its worthwhile elements are crammed into the last act. This is either a failure of pacing, or a failure of not having enough ideas to fill out a feature length. I actually think it is mostly the former, as the last 15 minutes or so show the weird, exciting adventure that this film could have been all along. Ultimately the catacombs are less Hell but something closer to purgatory. It is a gauntlet that can be survived, if those who pass through it prove worthy. Scarlet and her crew are haunted by terrible memories of their past, specifically, moments when a loved one died that they fear they could have done something to prevent. The ghosts of these loved ones can serve as agents of either retribution or forgiveness, which could have led to some fascinating psychological territory. But this pattern is a little inconsistent, and it takes too long for it to become clear for it to have its fullest effect. As Above, So Below does, however, feature a first-person perspective of Scarlet punching not one, but two, monsters in the head, after more than an hour of everyone having no idea how to fend off the evil creatures. C+
This Is A Movie Review: Boyhood
August 31, 2014
Cinema, Movie Reviews Leave a comment
I don’t know if the filming-over-11-years gimmick made this happen, or if it was just Richard Linklater’s sensibility, but Boyhood avoided just about every coming-of-age cliché it possibly could. And let’s be clear: the 11 years of filming was a gimmick. That’s not a knock – I love gimmicks. You just gotta commit to them. And the very nature of this gimmick required commitment.
There are so many moments in Mason Evans, Jr.’s boyhood that seem like they are heading towards the typical melodramatic formula of getting into trouble, followed by confrontations, and then tearful apologies. Take, for example, Mason drinking beer in his friend’s family cabin, or watching porn with his stepbrother. These are things that could get him into trouble, but instead, they are just things that happen. These moments are typical of most boys’ lives. What is important in portraying them is how each particular boy experiences them. This extended filmmaking technique proves to be a successful experiment in exploring these moments as they pertain to the meaning of growing up. A decade on one project has led to wonderfully internalized character work, resulting in one-of-a-kind performances from Ellar Coltrane (Mason), Patricia Arquette (Mason’s mom), Ethan Hawke (Mason, Sr.), and Lorelei Linklater (Mason’s sister). A-
This Is A Movie Review: Guardians of the Galaxy
August 17, 2014
Cinema, Movie Reviews 1 Comment
When reviewing the latest Captain America, I diagnosed myself with Superhero Fatigue. Marvel’s cinematic output has lately been consistent, but safe. So kudos to them for going unpredictable with Guardians of the Galaxy. This one is different insofar as it is not really a superhero movie at all, but insted a goofy romp through the universe starring roguish Earthling Peter Quill (Chris Pratt), roguish green woman Gamora (Zoe Saldana), roguish vengeful warrior Drax the Destroyer (Dave Bautista), roguish tree-like humanoid Groot (Vin Diesel), and roguish talking raccoon Rocket (Bradley Cooper, in one of the great voice acting performances of all time). The “space opera” is a longstanding genre, but it has been a long time since it has been presented as imaginatively and thoughtfully as it is here.
The plot revolves around a MacGuffin: an orb stolen by Quill that is sought by the genocidal Ronan the Accuser (Lee Pace) of the Kree race. Like other MacGuffins, this orb may not be what the movie is really about, but it is a bigger deal than most MacGuffins. Ronan means to use the orb to destroy an entire rival race, and the fight for possession of the orb lasts until the very end. Thus it is strange – though not necessarily problematically – that the tone remains so lighthearted throughout. Actually, the mix of light and dark that Guardians pulls off is often a highlight of great adventure films. It is just too bad that every discussion explaining the orb – and there are a lot of them – is a bunch of gobbledygook. It also would have been more engaging if Ronan and the other villains (save for Michael Rooker as the bandit Yondu, who was more antagonist than villain) had felt more like characters instead of just pure forces of evil. Ultimately, Guardians is inconsistent about conveying a high-stakes tone, rendering its thrills not quite as viscerally satisfying as they could have been. Still, it does pull off the fun side of the adventure genre with no problem, and I imagine it might grow on me, because I could watch a baby tree dance to the Jackson 5’s “I Want You Back” all day long. B








