Is There Anything Real to Grasp Onto in ‘Now You See Me: Now You Don’t’?

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I see them! … Or do I? (CREDIT: Lionsgate)

Starring: Jesse Eisenberg, Dominic Sessa, Justice Smith, Ariana Greenblatt, Woody Harrelson, Dave Franco, Isla Fisher, Rosamund Pike, Lizzy Caplan, Morgan Freeman

Director: Ruben Fleischer

Running Time: 112 Minutes

Rating: PG-13

Release Date: November 14, 2025 (Theaters)

I would LOVE to live in the world of the Now You See Me movies! Here’s why: nothing makes a lick of sense, but somehow everything always works out perfectly in the end. Just so long as you’re not one of those selfish Master of the Universe types, that is. Is this what justice looks like? Well, it’s at least what Justice Smith looks like, considering that he’s one of the main new stars arriving for the third entry, Now You Don’t. And in case you’re wondering, here’s my response to that subtitle: yes, they do, and they probably always will!

Grade: Actually, Though, This One’s a Little Too Illusory

‘A Real Pain’ is a Real Delight

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No Real Pain, No Real Gain (CREDIT: Searchlight Pictures)

Starring: Jesse Eisenberg, Kieran Culkin, Will Sharpe, Jennifer Grey, Kurt Egyiawan, Liza Sadovy, Daniel Oreskes

Director: Jesse Eisenberg

Running Time: 90 Minutes

Rating: R

Release Date: November 1, 2024 (Theaters)

Before I saw A Real Pain, I read and listened to what other people who had seen it thought about it. (That’s the sort of thing that happens when you’re a big fan of movies and you like to be a part of the conversation.) Some people expressed how they tend to be bothered by extremely neurotic folks like David (Jesse Eisenberg), whereas others expressed how they tend to be bothered by unpredictable wild cards like David’s cousin Benji (Kieran Culkin). Meanwhile, I’m like, “They’re both driving me batty!” Or they would, if I were interacting with them in real life. But instead, I’m watching their movie and declaring, “This is beautiful.” That’s the Power of Cinema!

Grade: Not Painful at All, Instead It Felt Like an Emotional Massage

Sasquatch People: Sunset with the Joker

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Mr. J & Mr. S (CREDIT: Altered Innocence/Screenshot; Bleecker Street)

Sasquatch Sunset

Starring: Riley Keough, Jesse Eisenberg, Christophe Zajac-Denek, Nathan Zellner

Directors: Nathan and David Zellner

Running Time: 89 Minutes

Rating: R

Release Date: April 12, 2024 (Theaters)

The People’s Joker

Starring: Vera Drew, Lynn Downey, Kate Distler, Nathan Faustyn, David Liebe Hart, Phil Braun, Maria Bamford

Director: Vera Drew

Running Time: 92 Minutes

Rating: Unrated

Release Date: April 5, 2024 (Theaters)

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‘Zombieland: Double Tap’ is at Its Best When It Fully Embraces Its Possible Irrelevance

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CREDIT: Sony/Columbia Pictures

Starring: Jesse Eisenberg, Woody Harrelson, Emma Stone, Abigail Breslin, Zoey Deutch, Rosario Dawson, Luke Wilson, Thomas Middleditch, Avan Jogia

Director: Ruben Fleischer

Running Time: 93 Minutes

Rating: R for All the Fluids That Spew Out in the Zombie Apocalypse

Release Date: October 18, 2019

There’s a running gag throughout Zombieland: Double Tap in which Tallahassee (Woody Harrelson) attempts to secure the title of “Zombie Kill of the Year.” He can never seem to quite pull it off, as his companion Columbus (Jesse Eisenberg) is on hand to helpfully inform us of some other recent dispatch of the undead that was just a little more impressive. This begs the question, in a post-apocalyptic world in which all mass communication has been decimated, how is word about these kills spreading so quickly and seamlessly? By Columbus providing this info via voiceover narration, there is an implication, perhaps unintentional, that he is somehow omniscient. Or maybe the conceit is that he is telling us this story years later, although that does not appear to be the case, what with the sense of immediacy to his dictation.

This is not the most worrisome concern to have, but it does stand in contrast to the original Zombieland, in which everything clicked into place just so, both comedically and logically. Double Tap has several elements like this that feel important but ultimately aren’t terribly so. The jokes are given greater emphasis, but even more essential is an investigation into a nagging sense of malaise. How do you go on living in a world overrun by zombies when killing zombies has become second nature? In addressing this question, the ten years that have passed since the first Zombieland are actually an advantage.

While people do die and new zombies are turned in this world, we are never worried that the makeshift family of Columbus, Tallahassee, Wichita (Emma Stone), and Little Rock (Abigail Breslin) will fall victim to the carnage. And they seem to know it. They’re living it up in the White House, treating every day like it’s Christmas, but that sense of security is only engendering mid-life, or quarter-life, crises. Columbus and Wichita especially are struggling with the realization that they have already accomplished all they need to in life by their thirties. I wish that the script had dug into these neuroses a little more deeply, but this movie works as well as it does because this malaise is the foundational conflict.

Now, to fully enjoy Double Tap, you’ll have to have a pretty big appetite for the same self-aware self-deprecating jokes being told over and over and a full embrace of certain stereotypes that have already been thoroughly deconstructed. But there’s a lot more melancholy than you might expect from a past-it-sell-by-date carnage-filled zom-com. If that’s not quite a Zombie Endorsement of the Year, it’s at least enough to assure us that our undead imaginations haven’t been fully depleted yet.

Zombieland: Double Tap is Recommended If You Like: Staring into the void, while repeating your favorite jokes over and over again

Grade: 3 out of 5 Rules

Movie Review: ‘The Hummingbird Project’ Wrings Some Meaning Out of a Story That Few, If Any, People Were Clamoring to Hear

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CREDIT: The Orchard

Starring: Jesse Eisenberg, Alexander Skarsgård, Michael Mando, Salma Hayek, Sarah Goldberg

Director: Kim Nguyen

Running Time: 111 Minutes

Rating: R for The Profanity of High-Stakes Finance

Release Date: March 15, 2019 (Limited)

The Hummingbird Project has one of the most stunningly esoteric premises of any theatrically released movie I have ever come across. So it’s a bit of a small miracle that it actually manages to be halfway compelling. It helps that the execution is straightforward, but that is also what holds it back from being truly memorable. Vincent Zaleski (Jesse Eisenberg) is a high-frequency trader whose dream is to build a fiber-optic cable line between Kansas and New Jersey that is efficient enough to decrease the time that information currently travels over that distance by one millisecond. But is that really his dream? Is that really anyone’s dream? His cousin and partner Anton (Alexander Skarsgård) is just as committed to the goal, but he essentially has a healthier perspective, treating it as a game or a code to crack. For Vincent, this is really about proving to the world that the little guy can come out on top, but his obsession has led him to turn the meaning of this highly specialized thing into the thing itself, when it actually represents normal human desires.

I imagine that many viewers will have the same reaction to Vincent and Anton that I did, which is to want to assure them that one millisecond cannot possibly be that important, no matter how many millions it will make them over the long run. Their pursuit is fundamentally maddening, though Eisenberg and Skarsgård make it palatable by tuning their performances to a sensitive enough key. It also helps that the script underlines how much they are doing this for a better family life. Vincent keeps reminding Anton that this job will ultimately lead to a charming, country mansion. Their desires are simple, really, as Vincent also promises that he will take Anton’s daughters out for ice cream once they return home.

Unsurprisingly, then, for a number of reasons, it turns out that Vincent is doing this all for his father, a Russian immigrant who was shaken down by government types on suspicion of being a communist spy. That led Vincent to learn that he needs to be so good at what he does that the people in charge cannot possibly deny it. This is a fairly unique version of the trope of attempting to please your parents after they’ve died, but it is not reason enough for Vincent to practically kill himself with his single-mindedness. It is a bit of a marvel how much relatable meaning can come out of this premise, but is still so esoteric as to have been seemingly made for one very specific theoretical viewer, and that viewer is not me.

The Hummingbird Project is Recommended If You Like: The specifics of laying down fiber-optic cable

Grade: 2.5 out of 5 Milliseconds

This Is a Movie Review: Now You See Me 2

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now-you-see-me-2

The first Now You See Me did not stick the landing so much as it hit the ground with a sledgehammer, by force of a twist ending that made one of its main characters much more psychotic than the film had any intention of grappling with. It was, in a word, breathtaking. Now You See Me 2 responds in kind with a similarly outrageous long con that is very much in keeping with the spirit of this series – that is to say: maddening, but weirdly satisfying if you have a high tolerance for insanity. The problem, however, is that this time there is not much to tide you over until that ending comes. Where the original had a silly but kinetic Robin Hood-style caper plot to run on, number 2 is a whole lotta lack of clarity.

I give Now You See Me 2 5 Acknowledgements of Its Sexism out of 10 Other Things It Should Have Also Been Doing.

SNL Recap January 29, 2011: Jesse Eisenberg/Nicki Minaj

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Cold Opening – Congresswoman Michele Bachman’s Response to the President’s State of the Union: The Second Attempt
The concept of technical difficulties galore was good for a few laughs and then it got a little old, but not as old as it could have gotten. Bachman offhandedly confirming that Xena was on the same tape as the Obama clip and the crash in the background at the end were the most amusing bits, because of how goofy and unexplained they were. B

Jesse Eisenberg’s Monologue
When Zuckerberg joined Eisenberg, it felt like they were going for pretend awkward, but instead it was just actually awkward. (Why didn’t all three Zuckerbergs appear together at the same time?) Jesse’s struggle to paint himself as cocky was well-intentioned, but that too was also awkward. C

Estro-maxx
This was one of the weakest premises SNL has ever had for a commercial parody, but thankfully it was part of a trend in which weak premises are saved by great performances. Bill, Fred, Paul, and Bobby especially were completely wholehearted in their roles, particularly while wining. And of course Kenan’s look of joyful surprise was the best moment. B

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