Does ‘The Phoenician Scheme’ Have What We’re Looking For?

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A couple of schemeers (Credit: Courtesy of TPS Productions/Focus Features © 2025 All Rights Reserved.)

Starring: Benicio del Toro, Mia Threapleton, Michael Cera, Riz Ahmed, Tom Hanks, Bryan Cranston, Mathieu Amalric, Richard Ayoade, Jeffrey Wright, Scarlett Johansson, Benedict Cumberbatch, Rupert Friend, Hope Davis, Bill Murray, Charlotte Gainsbourg, Willem Dafoe, F. Murray Abraham

Director: Wes Anderson

Running Time: 105 Minutes

Rating: PG-13 for Gunshots, Plane Crashes, and Mid-century Tobacco

Release Date: May 30, 2025 (Theaters)

What’s It About?: It’s 1950, and businessman Zsa-zsa Korda (Benicio del Toro) is at an impasse. He’s trying to complete a major infrastructure project, but he finds himself the victim of several assassination attempts and a consortium of rival tycoons trying to box him out from all of his moneymaking endeavors. Sensing that his demise may be imminent, he summons his nun-in-training daughter Liesl (Mia Threapleton) from the convent to inform her that he’s making her his sole heir. Then the two of them journey off along with his sons’ tutor Bjørn (Michael Cera) to close the funding gap for his project and maybe also discover who killed Liesl’s mother years ago.

What Made an Impression?: Is Redemption Possible?: Zsa-zsa is introduced as a ruthless capitalist who pretty much deserves to be assassinated. He might have even also killed Liesl’s mom! But does this rapscallion have the capacity for change? I must say, it’s hard not to notice some softening. Maybe it’s the visions of pearly gates, maybe it’s Liesl’s pious but nonjudgmental influence, but somehow someway he’s inching towards respectability. By the end, there are still plenty of grievous missteps on his ledger that he must accept responsibility for, but I mostly bought the redemption.
They Shoot, They Score!: My favorite scene in The Phoenician Scheme features Tom Hanks and Bryan Cranston as a pair of brothers playing basketball against Zsa-zsa and Riz Ahmed’s prince character. They call it 2-on-2, first-to-5, but it’s really a round of H-O-R-S-E. But who cares about technicalities when H&C relish tossing the rock this much? They might be AARP-eligible, but they’re looking more athletic than they ever have.
Silly Voices and Such: I’m not a super-fan of Wes Anderson, but I enjoy him well enough to consistently appreciate his fastidious eye for detail and ability to ground over-the-top fashion and quirky architecture. That works best in this feature in terms of the ridiculous accents that are occasionally revealed as put-ons for outlandishly simple disguises.* I chuckled heartily. (*Richard Ayoade, in contrast, deploys what I believe is his adorably natural voice as a communist revolutionary.)
A Star Takes Her Vows: Del Toro may be Number 1 on the call sheet, but I suspect that Threapleton will be enjoying the majority of the buzz. She’s the daughter of Kate Winslet and Jim Threapleton, so gird yourself if you have an aversion to nepo babies. But regardless of her heritage, she sets herself apart as a unique screen presence as she pulls off the neat trick of making us fall in love with a bride of Christ. Or maybe that’s actually the easiest task in the world, because of the taboo aspect of it all. Either way, she nails it.

The Phoenician Scheme is Recommended If You: Have an Endless Wes Andersonian Appetite, Forever and Ever, Amen

Grade: 3.5 out of 5 Hand Grenades

‘The Legend of Ochi’ Unfolds with Big-Eyed Wonder

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Which one’s the Ochi and which one’s the Human? (CREDIT: A24)

Starring: Helena Zengel, Willem Dafoe, Finn Wolfhard, Emily Watson

Director: Isaiah Saxon

Running Time: 96 Minutes11

Rating: PG for Weird Parental Energy and Some Cuts, Scrapes, and Bruises

Release Date: April 18, 2025 (Limited Theaters)/April 25, 2025 (Expands Wide)

What’s It About?: On a secluded island village in the Black Sea, a girl named Yuri (Helena Zengel) lives under the iron will of her father Maxim (Willem Dafoe). Along with Yuri’s older adoptive brother Petro (Finn Wolfhard) and the rest of Maxim’s army of young boys, their lives are almost entirely dedicated to hunting a supposedly monstrous species of orange-furred, blue-faced primates known as ochi. But Yuri is more than a little bit skeptical of this arrangement. Sure enough, she soon forges a deep connection with an adorable baby ochi, and they then commence on a journey back home that will undoubtedly reveal the truth about the ochi and Yuri’s family history.

What Made an Impression?: It’s Not Easy Being…: It’s not just the ochi’s faces that are blue. Their eyes are deep and icy as well, as are Yuri’s. (Helena Zengel is pretty much an ochi in human form.) There’s also an unforgettable blue caterpillar. I was certainly feeling blue by the end of it (in the Miles Davis Kind of sense). Hopefully you will as well.
Throwback Vibes: Chances are pretty high that The Legend of Ochi will have you asking, “Is it the 80s again?” Specifically the puppetry-based creature features that dominated the decade like E.T., The NeverEnding Story, and Labyrinth. Ochi is just as painstaking and otherworldly as all of those with its own mix of puppets, animatronics, and computer animation. The plot is fairly standard-issue, but the level of craft is off the charts.
Communication Studies: Yuri eventually reunites with her long-lost mother Dasha (Emily Watson), who is basically the polar opposite of her estranged husband, insofar as she’s dedicated her years to studying the singular wonders of the ochi. Her most powerful insight is that they talk not with words, but with sensation. Accordingly, I’m finding it a little lacking to verbalize my reaction to this movie. So maybe it’ll be better if I just conclude with a list of emotions that I felt while watching: awe, curiosity, compassion, hope, gratefulness, tingles, frustration, triumph, relief.

The Legend of Ochi is Recommended If You Like: Throwbacks that aren’t too beholden to their forerunners

Grade: 3.5 out of 5 Pigtails

Merry Christmas from Rock Stars, Vampires, and Boxers, Oh My!

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Merry Christmas from the Movies! (CREDIT [Clockwise from Top Left]: Aidan Monaghan/Focus Features; Sabrina Lantos/Amazon MGM; A24; Macall Polay/Searchlight Pictures)

A Complete Unknown

Starring: Timothée Chalamet, Edward Norton, Elle Fanning, Monica Barbaro, Boyd Holbrook, Scoot McNairy, Dan Fogler, Norbert Leo Butz, Eriko Hatsune, P.J. Byrne, Will Harrison, Charlie Tahan, Ryan Harris Brown, Eli Brown, Michael Chernus

Director: James Mangold

Running Time: 141 Minutes

Rating: R for Arrogant Artist Behavior

Release Date: December 25, 2024 (Theaters)

Nosferatu

Starring: Bill Skarsgård, Lily-Rose Depp, Nicholas Hoult, Aaron Taylor-Johnson, Emma Corrin, Willem Dafoe, Ralph Ineson, Simon McBurney

Director: Robert Eggers

Running Time: 132 Minutes

Rating: R for Ecstatic Sex and Bloodsucking

Release Date: December 25, 2024 (Theaters)

The Fire Inside

Starring: Ryan Destiny, Brian Tyree Henry, Oluniké Adeliyi, De’Adre Aziza, Sarah Allen

Director: Rachel Morrison

Running Time: 109 Minutes

Rating: PG-13 for Language, Jabs, and Hooks

Release Date: December 25, 2024 (Theaters)

The cinematic landscape at Christmas is typically dominated by franchise blockbusters and family-friendly flicks, with awards hopefuls also trying to make their way into the mix. But then there are also always some oddballs of various genres for anyone who prefers a more aggro or otherwise offbeat holiday. What’s interesting about December 25 this year is that all four of the wide releases arriving alongside Santa could be categorized in the alternative section. So which one of them should be your chaser after opening up all your presents? Or should you down some nog in preparation of a double feature? Here’s my take on the polar landscape.

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‘Saturday Night’ Seeks to Capture the Prelude to One of the Biggest Seventh Days of the Week of All Time

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I’m not Chevy Chase, and they’re not (CREDIT: Hopper Stone/Columbia Pictures)

Starring: Gabriel LaBelle, Rachel Sennott, Cory Michael Smith, Ella Hunt, Dylan O’Brien, Emily Fairn, Matt Wood, Lamorne Morris, Kim Matula, Finn Wolfhard, Nicholas Braun, Cooper Hoffman, Kaia Gerber, Andrew Barth Feldman, Tommy Dewey, Willem Dafoe, Matthew Rhys, J.K. Simmons, Jon Batiste, Naomi McPherson, Taylor Gray, Mcabe Gregg, Nicholas Podany, Billy Bryk, Ellen Boscov, Joe Chrest, Catherine Curtin, Leander Suleiman, Paul Rust, Robert Wuhl, Corinne Britti, Kirsty Woodward, Josh Brener, Brad Garrett

Director: Jason Reitman

Running Time: 109 Minutes

Rating: R for General Crudeness and Casual Backstage Drug Use, and One Unsolicited Private Release

Release Date: September 27, 2024 (Limited Theaters)/Expands October 4 and October 11

What’s It About?: As the prophet declared, “The show doesn’t go on because it’s ready, it goes on because it’s 11:30.” While that is a widely accepted maxim in 2024, a few decades ago it was met by the masses with an outpouring of skepticism. According to Saturday Night director Jason Reitman and his co-writer Gil Kenan’s telling, things were so touch-and-go that the first episode of Lorne Michaels’ brainchild barely made it to air in one piece. While the hour-and-a-half that began on the National Broadcasting Company at 11:30 PM Eastern on October 11, 1975 has since been immortalized, the hour-and-a-half that immediately preceded it was also apparently quite the transformative odyssey. And so, Saturday Night‘s log line is quite simple: the real-time chaos that led right up to the birth of one of the most famous TV shows of all time.

What Made an Impression?: Would You Accept a Wolverine in Place of the Truth?: Saturday Night is filled with an unending series of too-perfect coincidences that I don’t really have any interest in fact-checking (at least not in terms of whether or not they make for a worthwhile movie). Like, did John Belushi really refuse to sign his contract until approximately 15 minutes before the cameras started rolling? Surely that must have been sorted out days, if not weeks, earlier? I suppose it’s dramatically true enough, as Belushi was certainly known for being erratic. Some of these stunningly on-the-nose moments are kind of funny, like when Lorne has a sarcastic back-and-forth with a building employee who supposedly thinks that he’s producing Saturday night the night, as opposed to Saturday Night the TV show. But then there are similar incidents that I found myself groaning at, like Milton Berle lecturning everyone he encounters about the way that showbiz really works (although J.K. Simmons does play Uncle Miltie with the just right flavor of stunningly pompous).
Inescapable Iconography: It’s hard to imagine that Saturday Night will be anyone’s introduction to SNL. Even if you don’t watch every new episode like clockwork, you’ve surely encountered some of it through cultural osmosis. But save for a couple of semi-unavoidable bits, the movie mostly avoids the pitfall of simply recreating memes and catchphrases. Nevertheless, it isn’t like this is a completely untold story. The behind-the-scenes foibles have been recounted in numerous outlets on numerous occasions, and the characters are based on quite famous real people, many of whom are still alive. So it’s no surprise that some of these performances are mostly glorified impressions. To be fair, some of them are quite good impressions. Dylan O’Brien in particular captures the singularly rat-a-tat patter of Dan Aykroyd. Others have room to go a little deeper, especially Gabriel LaBelle in the lead, as he effectively captures the harried arrogance and earnestness of attempting to spark a revolution through television. But as good as LaBelle is, I can’t help but look at him and go, “That’s not Lorne Michaels.” It’s close, but not quite. That’s not necessarily a bad thing. But it is uncanny.
It’s Saturday Night, and You’re Not: I kind of wish that Saturday Night had gone the Weird biopic route, by maintaining some semblance of reality while obviously comedically exaggerating everything else. It certainly would have been in the spirit of a sketch show that has aired plenty of memorable parodies in its own right. Of course, it would be unfair to review it for not being something that it’s not trying to be. But it’s still fun to wonder, “What if?” As it is, we’ve got something that feels like cosplay populated by body snatchers. It’s energetic and loving cosplay, but the thrills are mostly theoretical rather than visceral.

Saturday Night is Recommended If You Like: Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip, Really sticking it to the censors, Bricks

Grade: 3 out of 5 Affiliates

It Used to Be That I’d Never Seen ‘Beetlejuice Beetlejuice’ Before in My Life. Or Afterlife. But Now That’s Changed!

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Beetlejuice being Beetlejuicy (CREDIT: Warner Bros. Pictures/Screenshot)

Starring: Michael Keaton, Winona Ryder, Catherine O’Hara, Jenna Ortega, Justin Theroux, Monica Bellucci, Willem Dafoe, Arthur Conti, Burn Gorman

Director: Tim Burton

Running Time: 104 Minutes

Rating: PG-13

Release Date: September 6, 2024 (Theaters)

After seeing Beetlejuice Beetlejuice, it made me want to:

  1. Figure out who Tess Parks is.
  2. Go Full Falsetto and perform “Tragedy” at karaoke.
  3. Wonder anew how and why so much of a song can be focused on a soggy cake.

Now, just because you’ve got an inspiring soundtrack, that doesn’t necessarily mean you’ve got a satisfyingly well-rounded movie. But I enjoyed most of the non-musical elements of Beetlejuice Beetlejuice as well! Thank you, 2024.

Grade: I Like-a the ‘juice

‘Kinds of Kindness’ is Kind of Out There

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What a racket! (CREDIT: Searchlight Pictures)

Starring: Jesse Plemons, Emma Stone, Willem Dafoe, Margaret Qualley, Hong Chau, Joe Alwyn, Mamoudou Athie, Hunter Schafer, Yorgos Stefanakos, Merah Benoit

Director: Yorgos Lanthimos

Running Time: 165 Minutes

Rating: R for Sexual Nudity, Ritual Nudity, Limb Removal, Petty Animal Cruelty, Etc.

Release Date: June 21, 2024 (Theaters)

What’s It About?: A man tries to break free from the grasp of the controlling boss who micromanages his entire life. Another man who looks just like that man suspects that the woman claiming to be his wife returning from a disappearance isn’t who she claims to be. Members of a cultish group are on a quest to find someone with the power of resurrection. It’s an anthology! And it’s called Kinds of Kindness, but I sure didn’t detect a whole lot of kindness in these vignettes. Maybe writer/director Yorgos Lanthimos and his co-writer Efthimis Filippou have a different conception of what that word means. Anyway, this movie is a real head-scratcher, in the sense that it produces the same sensation as sticking your finger up your nose and poking around in your brain tissue.

What Made an Impression?: O R.M.F., Where Art Thou?: Most of the main Kinds of Kindness cast members have a role in each of the three segments. Their respective roles have vaguely similar personalities, though it’s not clear if that’s how they were directed or if it just happens to be that way because they’re played by the same actors. If you squint, you can probably pick up on some Cloud Atlas vibes in the sense of the same souls existing within different beings. But since each Kinds of Kindness segment appears to take place in the present day, it comes across more as just alternative realities or hypothetical do-overs. The one constant is a guy known only by the initials “R.M.F.,” who serves as the namesake for each chapter despite not doing much of anything. Although, in the last part, entitled “R.M.F. Eats a Sandwich,” he does indeed eat a sandwich, so at least one promise is kept.
In the Mood for Vexation: Good movies often teach you how to watch them, but Kinds of Kindness seems intent on doing just the opposite. That doesn’t make it a bad movie per se, but if you don’t want to get frustrated, then you’ll have to adjust your calibrations and accept that you will almost certainly get frustrated. After releasing the most accessible film of his career last year in the form of Poor Things, Lanthimos has returned to the more impenetrable territory of The Lobster and The Killing of a Sacred Deer. (I haven’t seen his earlier Greek-language flicks, but they have a similar reputation.) I wasn’t expecting a satisfying ending, and I did not get a satisfying ending. I wasn’t expecting a legible message, and I did not get a legible message. There were moments here and there that brought a smile to my face (particularly a world run by dogs set to the tune of Dio’s heavy metal banger “Rainbow in the Dark”), but otherwise, this was a, shall we say, vacation into a land that claims to be speak the languages of English and cinema, and yet it’s not any form of communication that I recognize.

Kinds of Kindness is Recommended If You Like: Constantly opening one of those fake cans of nuts that’s actually a prank snake even though you know it’s going to be the snake every time

Grade: 3.5 out of 5 Changelings

‘Poor Things’ Seeks to Break Free

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How POOR are they?! (CREDIT: Atsushi Nishijima/Searchlight Pictures)

Starring: Emma Stone, Mark Ruffalo, Willem Dafoe, Ramy Youssef, Christopher Abbott, Jerrod Carmichael, Margaret Qualley, Kathryn Hunter, Suzy Bemba, Hanna Schygulla

Director: Yorgos Lanthimos

Running Time: 141 Minutes

Rating: R for Weird Science and Lots and Lots of Sex

Release Date: December 8, 2023 (Theaters)

What’s It About?: The case of Bella Baxter (Emma Stone) is a strange one. Dr. Godwin Baxter (Willem Dafoe) discovers her body after she attempts suicide and proceeds to bring her back to life via reanimation and a brain transplant. But because the brain he uses is that of a baby, Bella reverts to a rather infant-like mental state upon her resurrection. Her development back to a fully conscious adult happens remarkably quickly, all things considered, perhaps because that brain recognizes that it’s been encased inside an adult body. Nevertheless, Bella also gets to have the profound experience of being able to rediscover all the sensory pleasures of life on Earth.

Dr. Baxter understandably tries to keep her locked away from the outside world, though he does invite into the fold medical student Max McCandles (Ramy Youssef), who soon finds himself proposing marriage to Bella. But before that wedding can happen, she’s decided to see the outside world alongside hedonistic lawyer Duncan Wedderburn (Mark Ruffalo). As in many a hero’s journey, she will eventually return back to her starting point, having changed. But unlike a lot of other hero’s journeys, Poor Things features an unbound number of ecstatic sex scenes.

What Made an Impression?: A Fresh Set of Eyes: If there’s one lesson to be learned from Bella Baxter above all others, it’s the power of childlike wonder. Most of us have been living within our systems and routines too long to ever be able to fully question if there’s a better way. But Bella is a blank slate blessed with a mature body that can take advantage of her pleasures as much as possible. It’s a big reason why she charms everyone she encounters so much, despite her profoundly off-kilter, often juvenile disposition. It’s also, of course, why she enjoys sex (which she dubs “furious jumping”) as much as she does. However, her lack of inhibitions sometimes lead her astray, such as when she threatens to punch a crying baby, or when she tries to upend the carefully tended business practices at a Parisian brothel. But as her mental capacities lock into focus, she eventually devises compromises that she is uniquely qualified to conceptualize.
A World of Experimental Wonders: Bella is not Dr. Baxter’s only test subject, as we also get to meet some hybrid animal creatures wandering around his property that have been formed by head and body swapping among a goose, pig, and bulldog. The obvious antecedent here is Victor Frankenstein, but I also detected some playfulness in Dafoe’s performance, a la Futurama‘s Professor Farnsworth. Dr. Baxter has plenty in common with his hubristic brethren, particularly his tendency to seem like a deity to his creations. (It’s not for nothing that his first name is abbreviated to “God.”) Despite his tendency to control, he’s not as much of a monster as you might suspect. Instead, he’s one of the titular poor things, considering his history of abuse and experimentation at the hands of his own father. His abode is terrifying, but comfortingly so.
Soaking It All Up: If you somehow can’t engage with any of the characters of Poor Things, you can hopefully at least appreciate all the pretty business that director Yorgos Lanthimos and his crew have assembled. He’s certainly developed a unique visual style over the course of his career, and a movie set in an alternate version of the late Victorian era has allowed him plenty of room to be indelible. Fisheye lenses, purple-pink skies, spiral staircases that hover in the sky, and plenty more design choices make an inimitable visual impression. It’s all lived-in, anachronistic, and surreal, which is to say, an ideal environment for the Bella Baxters of the world to thrive in.

Poor Things is Recommended If You Like: American Pie, Socialist feminism, Steampunk

Grade: 4 out of 5 Transplants

Hayao Miyazaki Swoops In Out of Retirement to Deliver ‘The Boy and the Heron’

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Boy? Or Heron? (CREDIT: GKIDS)

Starring: Japanese Cast: Soma Santoki, Masaki Suda, Aimyon, Yoshina Kimura, Takuya Kimura, Shōhei Hino, Ko Shibasaki, Kaoru Kobayashi, Jun Kunimura
English Dubbed Cast: Luca Padovan, Robert Pattinson, Karen Fukuhara, Gemma Chan, Christian Bale, Mark Hamill, Florence Pugh, Willem Dafoe, Dave Bautista

Director: Hayao Miyazaki

Running Time: 124 Minutes

Rating: PG-13 for Lethal Flames and Freaky-Looking Talking Animals

Release Date: December 8, 2023 (Theaters)

What’s It About?: During the middle of World War II, 12-year-old Mahito’s mother Hisako dies in a hospital fire. One year later, his widowed father Shoichi remarries Hisako’s younger sister, Natsuko, and they all move from Tokyo to the countryside. Everyone at the estate is eager to lavish attention on Mahito, including the gaggle of maids, as well as a strange, persistent grey heron. Soon enough, that bird leads Mahiko into an alternate world where parakeets are the size of humans and Mahito’s missing granduncle is a wizard keeping existence in perfect balance. As the boy and the heron make their way through this parallel plane, the entire fate of his family might just rest upon the success of their journey.

What Made an Impression?: A Thin Line Between Reality and Fantasy: If you had no idea before reading this review that The Boy and the Heron was written and directed by Hayao Miyazaki, chances are you would’ve figured it out immediately upon reading that synopsis. In his decades-long career of helming animated classics like Princess Mononoke, Spirited Away, and Ponyo, Miyazsaki has tapped into eternal childlike wonder by having fantastical realms spring up within the confines of real world settings. Mahito’s trip into the alternate reality is so gradual that it almost feels like this sort of thing could happen to anybody who’s watching. It certainly helps that his situation always remains tethered to his starting point. That’s the sort of magic that Miyazaki is famous for, and it’s just as potent as it’s always been.
Seeking Harmony: Mahito’s world is in flux in pretty much every imaginable way on both grand and intimate scales. He’s been displaced by war, he’s lost a parent, and now animals are talking to him! No wonder the ultimate message of The Boy and the Heron is about putting everything back in balance. Mahito’s granduncle faces a mighty foe in this struggle in the form of the king of the parakeets, which feels a bit like avian slander, but in the context of the story, it works appropriately enough. Anyway, by the end of the movie, it’s kind of questionable whether or not full balance has actually been maintained. But perhaps that’s because the story is not really over. Mahito will be an adult soon enough, and this is exactly the sort of formative experience he could use to make sure that he grows up to be a valuable citizen of the world.
Subs vs. Dubs: And finally, I’ll offer a note about whether you should seek out the subtitled or dubbed version of The Boy and the Heron. I saw the former, which I generally prefer when it comes to foreign-language films, because I like to hear the native tongue, and I usually have the captions on anyway even when I’m watching something in English. But in this case I was a little disappointed that I didn’t get to see the dubbed version, because the English voice cast looks so promising. I’ll probably have to check it out eventually just so that I can hear Dave Bautista as the Parakeet King. If you have a choice between one or the other, I think you’ll be fine either way. And if you have the time and the inclination, then go ahead and give both versions a whirl!

The Boy and the Heron is Recommended If You Like: Miyazaki in general, The Chronicles of Narnia, The Aflac Duck

Grade: 4 out of 5 Parakeets

Wes Anderson Invites Us to Look to the Skies in ‘Asteroid City’

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3 Men, 1 Asteroid (CREDIT: Courtesy of Pop. 87 Productions/Focus Features)

Starring: Jason Schwartzman, Jake Ryan, Scarlett Johansson, Grace Edwards, Tom Hanks, Ella Faris, Gracie Faris, Willan Faris, Jeffrey Wright, Tilda Swinton, Bryan Cranston, Edward Norton, Adrien Brody, Liev Schreiber, Hope Davis, Stephen Park, Rupert Friend, Maya Hawke, Steve Carell, Matt Dillon, Hong Chau, Willem Dafoe, Margot Robbie, Tony Revolori, Jeff Goldblum, Sophia Lillis, Fisher Stevens, Ethan Josh Lee, Aristou Meehan, Rita Wilson, Jarvis Cocker, Bob Balaban, Seu Jorge

Director: Wes Anderson

Running Time: 105 Minutes

Rating: PG-13 for Mild Adult Themes and A Shot of Nudity at a Distorted Angle

Release Date: June 16, 2023 (Limited Theaters)/June 23, 2023 (Expands Wide)

What’s It About?: A motley crew of various characters converge in the titular town of Asteroid City in Wes Anderson’s latest ode to symmetry and midcentury vibes. They’re there for the Junior Stargazer convention, and some surprise visitors might just stop by as well. Front and center in the cavalcade are Augie Steenbeck (Jason Schwartzman), a war photographer whose father-in-law (Tom Hanks) keeps reminding him that he needs to tell his son Woodrow (Jake Ryan) and triplet daughters (Ella, Gracie, and Willan Faris) that their mother has recently died. And he’ll have plenty of time to do that now that their car has comically broken down!

In the meantime, he also strikes up a medium-hot rapport with movie star Midge Campbell (Scarlett Johansson), while her brainiac teenage daughter Dinah (newcomer Grace Edwards) and Woodrow form a smarty-pants committee with the other young budding astronomers in town. And it’s also worth noting that Asteroid City doesn’t actually exist, as the movie is presented as a play-within-a-movie, with occasional peeks behind the walls and curtains.

Don’t make an Asteroid out of yourself (CREDIT: Courtesy of Pop. 87 Productions/Focus Features)

What Made an Impression?: To B a Movie: Essentially, Asteroid City seems to be the end result of Wes Anderson watching a whole bunch of 50s and 60s sci-fi B movies and then going, “Okay, what if we made another one of those, but did it a little like this?” This is something that would’ve been called “The Terror in the Skies” back in the day, although in Wes’ version, the real terror comes from all the heavy emotions in our hearts that we haven’t fully confronted yet. But thanks to his signature gentle approach, we feel safe that we’ll get there. It’s the inverse of Nope: instead of freaking out at a potential extraterrestrial, we lean in and start thinking, “Hey there, stranger.”
The Persistence of Memory: Perhaps the most striking scene in Asteroid City (at least from my vantage point) is a memory game played by Woodrow, Dinah, and a few other junior stargazers. They take turns naming a famous person, and these brainiacs all choose some of the most difficult-to-pronounce monikers in the world. Invariably, though, they have no trouble keeping any of them straight. That scene isn’t representative of the entire movie from a plot standpoint, but it does capture the vibe in full.
The Gang’s All There: Asteroid City‘s major movie star cast is as much a bounty of riches as any other Wes Anderson flick, perhaps more than ever. A few of the players just pop in for little more than cameos, and the whole adventure can feel a little overwhelming. There’s a lot packed into just an hour and 45 minutes! On top of that, the play-within-a-movie structure presents more to keep track of than I was expecting. For full digestion, you might want a second viewing, for both intellectual and emotional fulfillment.

Asteroid City is Recommended If You Like: B flicks, Dusty summer camps, Burial ceremonies

Grade: 3.5 out of 5 Stargazers

Willem Dafoe is Stuck ‘Inside’ – Should You Join Him?

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Knock Knock. Who’s ‘Inside’? Willem Dafoe. Willem Dafoe Who? Willem Dafriend. (CREDIT: Courtesy of Focus Features)

Starring: Willem Dafoe

Director: Vasilis Katsoupis

Running Time: 105 Minutes

Rating: R, Because Weird Things Happen When You’re Stuck All Alone in a Penthouse

Release Date: March 17, 2023 (Theaters)

What’s It About?: Have you ever wanted to be endlessly trapped in a penthouse apartment with Willem Dafoe? Then Inside is the movie for you! Although, that promise of companionship might not be all it’s cracked up to be. Dafoe plays Nemo, an art thief who finds himself in accidental solitary confinement when an attempted heist becomes completely pear-shaped. The penthouse’s security system goes haywire (or maybe this is exactly how it’s supposed to work when an intruder arrives), and Nemo’s associates on the outside immediately abandon him. There’s basically no hope of escape, and any flash of hope that Nemo can signal someone on the outside for help is merely that, just a flash. But at least there’s plenty of expensive art to keep him company!

What Made an Impression?: I know I’m not the only one who thinks of Willem Dafoe as “Willem Da Friend.” What I’m trying to say is, I’m always happy when he’s on my screen. But it turns out that it’s a big ask to watch just about anyone wasting away in such relentless isolation. I’d like to believe that there are interesting ways to keep someone trapped, but Inside struck me as mostly tedious. It has some ideas on its mind, but nothing really tickled my philosophical bone.

At the beginning of the film, Nemo recalls in voiceover a time he was asked as a child what three things he would save if his house were on fire. At the time, he settled upon an AC/DC CD, his cat, and his sketchbook. Looking back on that moment, he now seems less fond of the Australian rockers and the meowing critter, but he firmly believes that “art is for keeps.” Perhaps his current predicament is meant as a test of that theory? If it is, we never really see him grapple with any sort of existential conundrum. Sure, he gradually loses his sanity, but that would probably happen to anybody in his situation, no matter what their feelings about art.

The one element of Inside that I unreservedly enjoyed was the refrigerator that plays the “Macarena” (of 90s dance craze fame) whenever it’s opened. If we had gotten an hour and a half of Dafoe boogieing along with Los Del Rio, instead of just a few minutes, I think I would have bit just a bit harder. If my house were on fire, I would want to ensure that “Macarena” makes it out alive. Luckily, I wouldn’t have to worry, because there’s no way you can burn away the indelible spirit it’s left on all of humanity. Inside doesn’t fully emphasize the power of the Macarena, but it certainly doesn’t dispute it either, and that’s the message I’m choosing to focus on.

Inside is Recommended If You Like: Insisting that everything is art

Grade: 2 out of 5 CCTVs

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