Vince Vaughn and Kathryn Newton Get ‘Freaky,’ and a Bloody Silly Time Will Be Had By All

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Freaky (CREDIT: Brian Douglas/Universal Pictures)

Starring: Vince Vaughn, Kathryn Newton, Katie Finneran, Celeste O’Connor, Misha Osherovich, Uriah Shelton, Alan Ruck

Director: Christopher Landon

Running Time: 101 Minutes

Rating: R for Stunningly Over-the-Top Gore and Bluntly Disturbing Profanity

Release Date: November 13, 2020 (Theaters)/December 4, 2020 (On Demand)

When the elevator pitch for a movie is “A serial killer swaps bodies with a teenage girl,” how could its title be anything other than “Freaky Friday the 13th”? Maybe litigiousness was a concern, or perhaps brevity really is the soul of witty knifeplay, as co-writer/director Christopher Landon and company ultimately settled on the shorter moniker Freaky for this breezy and deadly concoction. Landon is best known for mashing up slashers and time loops in Happy Death Day and its sequel, and now he’s got another unlikely complement for his preferred horror subgenre. The hallmarks of the two formulas mix together mostly seamlessly, as mystical mumbo-jumbo and a race to a point-of-no-return countdown are punctuated by buckets of gore.

The teenage girl in question is Millie Kessler (Kathryn Newton), who’s been going through life in a bit of a daze ever since her dad died about a year ago, while the serial killer (Vince Vaughn) is known as the Blissfield Butcher, and that’s pretty much all you need to know about him. Freaky‘s slasher approach is most directly inspired by the Friday the 13th franchise, particularly the early sequels in which the be-masked Jason Voorhees’ motivation gradually drifts away from revenge and more towards a general unquenchable thirst for killing. For Newton, that means playing the Butcher in Millie’s body as mostly a silent stalker, while occasionally dropping piercingly vulgar threats of violence. If the Butcher is motivated by anything, it’s shiny objects, as he is positively entranced by a beautiful kitchen knife, while his fashion sense leads him to outfit Millie’s body in a striking blood-red jacket.

Vaughn has a much more effervescent role to play, which he tackles with a level of relish that is always ready to be tapped whenever he’s given the right material. With arms akimbo and his heart on his sleeve, he nails the looseness of someone who suddenly finds herself a foot taller and about one hundred pounds bigger. Millie’s fascination with all the nooks, crannies, and appendages of her new body is infectious and an inspiration for all of us to celebrate the vessels we’re currently living in, body swap or no. Good on Vaughn for being so fully up for anything!

As for the actual story, Freaky lacks the emotional oomph present in the best of the body swap genre (or the best of the slasher genre, certainly). The thematic heft of the body swap tends to be driven by the swappers ultimately coming to an understanding with each other, but that’s not exactly going to work when one of them is basically an embodiment of pure evil. So we must be sated by the goofball charm, of which there is plenty, and the absurd graphic violence, of which there is even more. Landon is clearly here to revel in the most baroque excesses of the slasher world, as the Butcher utilizes the likes of a toilet seat and a tennis racket in profoundly lethal ways. Also there’s apparently a cryogenic chamber in a high school locker room. All that AND there’s a “Que Sera Sera” needledrop. Quite frankly, I think Freaky knows exactly who its audience is.

Freaky is Recommended If You Like: Friday the 13th Parts 3 through 6, Grindhouse-style gore, The continued relevance of Vince Vaughn

Grade: 3 out of 5 Magic Daggers

‘Ammonite’ Review: Love on the Rocks

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Ammonite (CREDIT: NEON)

Starring: Kate Winslet, Saoirse Ronan, Fiona Shaw, Gemma Jones, James McArdle

Director: Francis Lee

Running Time: 120 Minutes

Rating: R for Some Quite Graphic Bedroom Scenes

Release Date: November 13, 2020 (Theaters)/December 4, 2020 (On Demand)

Man, if you’re into rocks AND forbidden love stories, you’re gonna love Ammonite. Me personally, I can certainly enjoy the latter, though they can be heart-wrenchingly bittersweet. As for the former, rocks definitely serve their purpose here on Earth, but I’m not particularly inclined to spend an entire day studying them. Nor am I particularly inclined to watch a movie that dedicates a good portion of itself to people doing just that. But I always aim to be open-minded, so I decided to give Ammonite a chance to see if it could win me over. Ultimately, it all went about exactly as I would have expected, with the paleontology scenes making me go, “Wow, Kate Winslet sure does enjoy studying fossils a lot more than I ever would” and the romance scenes making me go, “Wow, Kate Winslet and Saoirse Ronan sure do trust each other enough to get really, really explicit.”

It’s the 1840s on the Southern English coast. Winslet plays Mary Anning, who is now officially the most passionate paleontologist I’ve ever heard of. She supports herself and her mother by selling fossils to tourists, and one of those folks, geologist Roderick Murchison (James McArdle), offers her something rather unique. His wife Charlotte (Ronan) is suffering from one of those vague 19th century illnesses that result in general exhaustion, and he’s entrusted Mary to caring after her. Mary and Charlotte proceed to spend plenty of time alone, thus awakening passions that are generally not spoken about in polite British society.

Like most other recent period queer love stories I’ve encountered, the affair between Mary and Charlotte is able to thrive in a little pocket of the larger world. There’s even a hint that it could last indefinitely. So I’m fascinated that the ultimate roadblock for these two is less about society frowning upon them and more about the struggle to bridge the gap between their very different lives. Mary is so married to her work that she cannot imagine uprooting herself in any way (there’s also the matter of supporting her mother). With Ammonite so firmly foregrounded in the literal ground, it comes off as rather quotidian and even dispassionate (though certainly not shy). So in conclusion, I haven’t suddenly been inspired to start studying fossils myself, but I am still heartbroken when two star-crossed souls can’t quite make it work.

Ammonite is Recommended If You Like: Fossils, Portrait of a Lady on Fire, Rocks on the beach, Walks on the beach

Grade: 3 out of 5 Rocks

Jeff’s Wacky SNL Review: Dave Chappelle/Foo Fighters

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SNL: Dave Chappelle, Foo Fighters (CREDIT: YouTube Screenshot)

The last time Saturday Night Live aired a new episode on NBC the Saturday immediately after an American presidential election, the host was Dave Chappelle. And the exact same thing happened this year! Was that booking intentional? I would guess “yes.”

Back in 2016, the musical guest paired with Dave was A Tribe Called Quest in their first ever SNL appearance. But this time, the musical guest is Foo Fighters, in their 8th ever SNL appearance. Like the host, the lead singer of the Foos is also named Dave. How often have the host and musical guest on the same episode had the same first name?! I can’t think of any other time, so let’s take a beat to honor this moment.

~~~

If you’re wondering where I was at while watching this episode (and I bet you are, because I usually let you know), I got up and had a fine Sunday breakfast of scrambled eggs and buttered English muffin. It was about 45 degrees Fahrenheit outside when I got out of bed, but it was forecasted to go up by 30 degrees by the middle of the day. In November!

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That’s Auntertainment! Mini-Episode: Aunt Beth Tells Jeff to Listen to ‘We Shall Overcome: The Seeger Sessions’

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Aunt Beth decided that it was a good time for Jeff to listen to the 2006 Bruce Springsteen album We Shall Overcome: The Seeger Sessions. Does he overcome? Will we all overcome? Listen to find out!

Entertainment To-Do List: Week of 11/6/20

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Moonbase 8 (CREDIT: Showtime/YouTube Screenshot)

Every week, I list all the upcoming (or recently released) movies, TV shows, albums, podcasts, etc. that I believe are worth checking out.

TV
Moonbase 8 Series Premiere (November 8 on Showtime) – Fred Armisen, Tim Heidecker, and John C. Reilly go to the moon!
The Unicorn Season 2 Premiere (November 12 on CBS)

Music
-Kylie Minogue, Disco

Music on TV
-2020 Rock and Roll Hall of Fame Induction Ceremony (November 7 on HBO)

Books
Answers in the Form of Questions: A Definitive History and Insider’s Guide to Jeopardy! (November 10) – Written by The Ringer‘s Claire McNear!

Jeff’s Wacky SNL Review: John Mulaney/The Strokes

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SNL: John Mulaney, The Strokes, Ego Nwodim (CREDIT: YouTube Screenshot)

With this, the most Halloween-iest episodes of Saturday Night Live, former SNL writer John Mulaney enters rarefied hosting territory by hosting more than once in a single calendar year. His last time on the Studio 8H stage was on February 29, 2020, which was a notable date not only because it was a Leap Day but also because it was one of the last live in-studio shows before the pandemic necessitated the shutdown of most in-person gatherings. This booking might demonstrate that the folks on SNL are not a superstitious lot, for otherwise they would fear that Mulaney’s presence would portend another shutdown. Or perhaps they are superstitious, just in the opposite direction, with the hope that his return might augur a return to safer times.

Musical guest The Strokes, like Mulaney, are also making their fourth official appearance.

They were last on in 2011, a time when Charlie Sheen was inescapable. What’s Carlos up to these days? Still throwing heaters?

While watching this episode, I downed some scrambled eggs, toast, and coffee cake, and the night before, I watched some football and put on a hybrid Halloween costume, so I was ready and rarin’ to go!

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That’s Auntertainment! Episode 21: The Baby-Sitters Club

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The Baby-Sitters Club (CREDIT: Netflix)

Aunt Beth and Jeff had a great idea: they’re going to record a podcast episode about The Baby-Sitters Club, and they’re going to invite all their favorite family members to join! That’s right, Jeff’s cousin/Aunt Beth’s niece Megan and her daughters Elsa and Mia are here to break it all down as we figure out if we’re a Kristy, a Claudia, a Mary Anne, a Stacey, or a Dawn.

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