‘Bad Luck Banging or Loony Porn’ is Thoughtful and Playful with Its Explicit Subject Matter

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Bad Luck Banging or Loony Porn (CREDIT: Magnolia Pictures)

Starring: Katia Pascariu, Claudia Ieremia, Olimpia Malai, Nicodim Ungureanu

Director: Radu Jude

Running Time: 106 Minutes

Rating: Unrated (But Do Know That It Gets Pretty Explicit)

Release Date: November 19, 2021 (Theaters)

Every once in a while, a movie breaks itself up into chapters via on-screen intertitles, but rarely can I ever discern much of a difference between those chapters, thematic or otherwise. But finally a film has come along with some clear reasons for the delineation. It has emerged out of Romania, and it goes by the name of Bad Luck Banging or Loony Porn (or Babardeală cu bucluc sau porno balamuc, if you prefer its native tongue). It has a fairly familiar premise: schoolteacher Emi (Katia Pascariu) makes a sex tape and then it’s accidentally discovered by the people in her life. But I can guarantee you don’t know what’s coming next. The first section consists of Emi walking around town in the wake of the tape leaking; the middle is a montage of “definitions” of various words and concepts; and then it all wraps up in a heated and often hilarious parent-teacher conference.

It’s immediately clear that Bad Luck Banging is far from the typical American version of this story, in terms of its sexual explicitness and its patience. So much of the cinematography of the first third consists of lingering shots of buildings and streetscapes. In the most literal sense, this portion is just about how Emi gets from point A to point B. And point C. And points D and E and F. I eventually started to wonder if writer-director Radu Jude had been influenced by Birdemic. This section does also serve the purpose of presenting what Romanian society looks like in the midst of the COVID-19 pandemic, which in a word is: RUDE! I sure hope it’s not always like that, as Emi’s day-to-day life is simply exhausting, in a way that has nothing to do with the sex tape.

The middle section is a grab bag of jokes and social commentary, and it’s really exciting to stumble across a movie that sticks some formal experimentation within a more traditional narrative structure. Another reason that it’s so exciting is because I don’t know what is going to pop up on screen on a second-by-second basis. And if I ever watch this movie again, that will still probably be true, because I haven’t remembered every single part of this section. If I had, I would’ve recounted them in detail to you fine readers of this review!

And finally, I guess I better talk about the last section, seeing as I talked about both of the previous sections. It’s only fair. During the parent-teacher conference, Emi is presented as the One Sane Woman amidst a phalanx of prudes, conspiracy theorists, and other nutcases. The crowd is understandably upset about what their kids have been exposed to, but they don’t seem very interested in finding a reasonable solution. Ultimately, this sequence is a Big Fat Plea to allow consenting adults to live their sex lives however they want to. And it’s playful throughout, particularly in a series of alternate endings that let the imagination run wild. Open-mindedness is useful for a number of reasons.

Bad Luck Banging or Loony Porn is Recommended If You Like: Jean-Luc Godard, Watching private parts in public, Curb Your Enthusiasm

Grade: 4 out of 5 Sex Tapes

Jeff’s Wacky SNL Review: Jonathan Majors/Taylor Swift

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SNL: Bowen Yang, Taylor Swift, Jonathan Majors, Aidy Bryant (CREDIT: NBC/Screenshot)

In case this is the first of my SNL reviews you’re reading this season (or if you just need a refresher), I’ve been mixing up the order in which I list each sketch. This time, I’ve listed them in order of how long my notes were for each sketch, starting with the most notes. (You’ll have to trust me on this one.)

Anyway, Jonathan Majors was booked as the host, while Taylor Swift managed to be the musical guest. This is his first time entertaining us from Studio 8H, while she’s been here multiple times already. Maybe she gave him some advice.

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That’s Auntertainment! Karaoke Korner 23

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Sarah Jett Rayburn isn’t just a Jeopardy! champion, she’s also the latest contributor to Karaoke Korner, as she has Jeff make his selections from the works of country gal Miranda Lambert, Euro-disco crew Boney M., and Mother Monster Lady Gaga.

‘Julia’ is on Fire

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Julia (CREDIT: Sony Pictures Classics/Screenshot)

Starring: Julia Child and Friends

Directors: Julie Cohen and Betsy West

Running Time: 95 Minutes

Rating: PG-13

Release Date: November 12, 2021 (Theaters)

The beginning of the Julia Child documentary Julia features footage of Ms. Child in the kitchen to the tune of Jimi Hendrix’s psychedelic hard rock classic “Fire.” Which had me going, “Awww, yeah!” I love that sort of juxtaposition! The rest of the movie is a fairly typical biographical documentary, what with its mix of archival footage and interviews with family, friends, and fans. But that opening has me wondering about other potential mashup ideas: the Barefoot Contessa set to Metallica, perhaps? Emeril Lagasse chopping away while Phish jams on? The Swedish Chef bork bork-ing as Yoko Ono howls with abandon? Chime in if you’ve got any other ideas!

Grade: 3 Chopped Fingers in the Beef Bourguignon

Jeff’s Wacky SNL Review: Kieran Culkin/Ed Sheeran

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SNL: Heidi Gardner, Kieran Culkin, Chris Redd (CREDIT: NBC/Screenshot)

I ran the New York City Marathon on Sunday, November 7, 2021, which made it a little difficult to post my review of the 11/6/21 SNL on Sunday as I normally do. Sorry, Kieran Culkin and Ed Sheeran! (They were the guests of this episode.) So I decided instead to write this review over the course of the week, at a rate of a few sketches per day. Anyway, maybe it was the post-marathon glow, but I really enjoyed this episode!

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Entertainment To-Do List: Week of 11/12/21

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The Shrink Next Door (CREDIT: Apple TV+)

Every week, I list all the upcoming (or recently released) movies, TV shows, albums, podcasts, etc. that I believe are worth checking out.

Movies
–Belfast (Theaters) – This takes place in Belfast.
–Clifford the Big Red Dog (Theaters and Paramount+) – I love dogs.
–Julia (Theaters) – Documentary about Julia Child.

TV
–The Shrink Next Door Series Premiere (November 12 on Apple TV+) – Starring Will Ferrell and newly minted Sexiest Man Alive Paul Rudd.
–Snoopy in Space Season 2 (November 12 on Apple TV+)
–The World According to Jeff Goldblum Season 2 Premiere (November 12 on Disney+)
–Riverdale Season 6 Premiere (November 16 on The CW)

Music
-Damon Albarn, The Nearer the Fountain, More Pure the Stream Flows
-Courtney Barnett, Things Take Time, Take Time
-Gov’t Mule, Heavy Load Blues

‘Belfast’ Presents a Coming-of-Age Story in a Time of Troubles

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Belfast (CREDIT: Rob Youngson/Focus Features)

Starring: Jude Hill, Catríona Balfe, Jamie Dornan, Judi Dench, Ciarán Hinds, Colin Morgan, Lara McDonnell, Olive Tennant

Director: Kenneth Branagh

Running Time: 97 Minutes

Rating: PG-13 for Explosive Violence and Some Language

Release Date: November 12, 2021 (Theaters)

If you’re a nine-year-old boy who takes school seriously, can’t you just pine after the classmate you’re sweet on without having to worry about a war raging in your neighborhood? That’s the conundrum in which little Buddy (Jude Hill) finds himself in 1960s Belfast, Northern Ireland in the film named after the city written and directed by Belfast native Kenneth Branagh. He’s at that age when he’s really starting to notice the opposite sex, but you get the sense that he’s also the one of those kids who never thought that girls were icky. His teacher has a system wherein whoever does best on the math tests gets to sit at the front of the room. Buddy’s stuck in the middle when we meet him, while his crush Catherine (Olive Tennant, daughter of David) is firmly ensconced in the #1 position. Will Buddy work his way up to the front? It’s good motivation if you can get it.

We never doubt Buddy’s sweetness, or his studiousness, but we do worry that he might get waylaid by forces beyond his control, considering the time and place he’s living. This was the beginning of “The Troubles,” a decades-long ethnic conflict in the country. As presented in Belfast, it’s primarily a fight against Catholics instigated by Protestants. Buddy’s family are Protestants, but they’re decidedly against participating in the fight in any capacity. My reaction to the presence of The Troubles, both within the movie and in real life, is much the same as that of Buddy’s dad (Jamie Dornan), who basically tells the local ringleader, “Get out of here. We don’t want any part of this.” I really just want to see Buddy’s budding love life and the rest of what he does for fun. Perhaps the context of national strife provides some extra dramatic oomph, but I’m pretty sure I like coming-of-age stories even when they take place in times of peace.

So what else did I like about this movie? Buddy’s relationships with his family members were certainly a treat to peak in on. His mom (Catríona Balfe) steadily holds down the fort, while his grandparents (Judi Dench and Ciarán Hinds) are founts of wisdom. Also, there’s this really memorable scene at the end when his dad gives him some great advice about tolerance and open-heartedness. The moments when the family watch movies are also quite a bit fun (partly because they provide a bit of color to the otherwise black-and-white presentation). This certainly feels like the most personal directorial effort I’ve ever seen from Branagh. It is semi-autobiographical after all, and you can feel that.

Belfast is Recommended If You Like: British villages, Love fueled by academic success, Guileless discussions about religion

Grade: 3.5 out of 5 Maths

‘Clifford the Big Red Dog’ is Worth a Watch If You Feel Like Being Silly

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Clifford the Big Red Dog (CREDIT: Paramount Pictures)

Starring: Darby Camp, Jack Whitehall, Izaac Wang, John Cleese, Tony Hale, Sienna Guillory, David Alan Grier, Alex Moffat, Jessica Keenan Wynn, Russell Wong, Paul Rodriguez, Russell Peters, Mia Ronn, Kenan Thompson, Rosie Perez

Director: Walter Becker

Running Time: 97 Minutes

Rating: PG for The Nuttiness Caused by a Giant Puppy

Release Date: November 10, 2021 (Theaters and Paramount+)

What would YOU do if a 20-foot-plus red-furred dog started running around all over everywhere? I imagine most people would react with a mixture of shock and confusion, but in this particular pup’s cinematic adventure directed by Walt Becker (Wild Hogs, Old Dogs), there’s a wider range of reactions. Clifford is cause not only for sublime awe, but also for worries about being a good caretaker, or the impetus to justify eviction, or for a standard-issue evil mega-corporation to swoop in and claim that they own everything. And of course, he becomes a bit of a local neighborhood hero. People act very wacky in Clifford the Big Red Dog, in ways that are fairly typical of a family flick, but not always in ways that necessarily go hand-in-hand with the presence of a gigantic canine, and I appreciate that.

The plot essentials that you might want to know are that sixth-grader Emily Elizabeth (Darby Camp) finds herself with an incorrigible dog after an encounter in Central Park with the mysterious and magical Mr. Bridwell (John Cleese) and his animal emporium. Her Uncle Casey (Jack Whitehall) isn’t so keen on her keeping Clifford, mostly because he wants to prove to his sister, Emily’s mom Maggie (Sienna Guillory), that he can be responsible. Meanwhile, Mr. Packard the super (David Alan Grier) doesn’t like dogs, and Tony Hale swoops in as a plainly devious CEO to capture Clifford and discover the secrets of his genetic code.

Obviously, something as kid-friendly as this movie is going to end with every character (except the most villainous or toady-ish) rallying around to save the day. So the most important question is: just how goofy do things get? And the answer is … pretty dang goofy. For a generally tame PG movie, there were several moments that had me delighting in their brazenness. A choice example happens when a veterinarian played by Kenan Thompson tries to gently inform us that Clifford’s temperature is supposed to be taken in the normal animal-temperature-taking location (“rhymes with nuthole”). And Clifford himself is as expressive as any real dog, so that plays well whenever there needs to be a definitive reaction shot.

So now the final question: do I want a big red dog of my own? My current living situation isn’t exactly the most dog-friendly, but let’s suppose I have a theoretically more welcoming setup. So with that in mind, I’d have to say: while a mutt like Clifford is great in a pinch whenever you need to run across a bridge, this movie isn’t shy about reminding us of the anatomical and practical matters that need can’t be avoided. Believing in magic can only take us so far, but we can always lighten the mood by saying silly things along the way.

Clifford the Big Red Dog is Recommended If You Like: Goofy uncles, Kid-friendly scatological humor, Standard kids movie tropes

Grade: 3 out of 5 Whimpers

Entertainment To-Do List: Week of 11/5/21

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(CREDIT: Apple TV+)

Every week, I list all the upcoming (or recently released) movies, TV shows, albums, podcasts, etc. that I believe are worth checking out.

Movies
–The Beta Test (Theaters)
–Eternals (Theaters)

TV
–Animaniacs Season 2 (November 5 on Hulu)
–Big Mouth Season 5 (November 5 on Netflix) – Looks like November is Animat-vember.
–Dickinson Season 3 Premiere (November 5 on Apple TV+) – Final Season Alert!
–Joe Pera Talks With You Season 3 Premiere (November 7 on Adult Swim)

Music
-Aimee Mann, Queens of the Summer Hotel
-Diana Ross, Thank You
-Nathaniel Rateliff & the Night Sweats, The Future

‘The Beta Test’ Earns an Alpha Grade

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The Beta Test (CREDIT: IFC Films)

Starring: Jim Cummings, Virginia Newcomb, PJ McCabe, Jessie Barr, Jacqueline Doke, Wilky Lau

Director: Jim Cummings

Running Time: 93 Minutes

Rating: Unrated (But It Would be R for Spiraling Profanity and Blindfolded Sex)

Release Date: November 5, 2021 (Theaters)

When I sat down to watch The Beta Test, I initially thought that I had walked into the wrong room. What the heck was this Swedish domestic drama doing on the screen? Wasn’t I supposed to be watching an American satire about Hollywood wheeling-and-dealing? But then, sure enough, the words “The Beta Test” showed up on screen and the opening credits started unspooling in the English language. But then I had another worry, as this whole affair quickly began to feel a little too inside baseball.

Jim Cummings stars (and also co-wrote and co-directed alongside co-star PJ McCabe) as high-strung Hollywood agent Jordan, who’s dealing with a looming wedding right when a mysterious purple envelope pops into his mailbox inviting him to an anonymous sexual adventure. Could something so squarely set within the showbiz industry play anywhere outside Southern California? I’m here to say that it can, as long as you’re in the mood for a darkly comedic horror tale about data collection and personal facades slipping away.

Now is the time when I pose the question: would I myself like to take The Beta Test? I’m certainly tempted by the lustiest moments, and those purple envelopes are rather alluring. But the consequences are also unavoidably clear, as each instance of the test involves infidelity that pretty much inevitably leads to a deadly lovers’ quarrel. I’m single, though, so I theoretically wouldn’t have to worry about that. But the parameters of The Beta Test are set up so that only people in relationships are targeted. So, if I were in a relationship, I would promise The Beta Test that I would be completely honest with my partner, no matter what decision I make.

There’s a strong suggestion within the movie that honesty is the best policy, as Jordan gets himself into heaps of trouble but ultimately finds his way back, or discovers a new way forward, by essentially vomiting up the contents of his soul during the climax. Couple that with some subtle hints that seem to suggest that his fiance Caroline (Virginia Newcomb of The Death of Dick Long fame) might also be somehow involved in The Beta Test, thus giving off this surreal sense that maybe everyone on screen is ensnared in one way or another.

So perhaps we’re all a part of this game anyway. This movie hinges on the seemingly limitless possibilities presented by data collection. In the social media era, so much information about ourselves is publicly available, and The Beta Test posits that with just a few clicks, a whole parade of suckers can be lured into a dangerous Eyes Wide Shut-style game. When this premise is explained within the movie, it’s certainly based on a foundation of reality, though you might confidently respond, “But at least it’s not really that bad.” The thing is, though … what if it is? What if The Beta Test really is playing out right under our noses? In the wake of watching this movie, I’m finding myself in a push-pull between “no, that’s not possible” and “actually, it might be very possible.” That’s the sort of pendulum where unforgettable movies like this one get stuck in your cerebrum for a good long while.

The Beta Test is Recommended If You Like: Deleting your Facebook account, Jokes about absurd cinematic reboots, Enigmatic flashbacks

Grade: 3.5 out of 5 Purple Envelopes

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