‘PAW Patrol: The Dino Movie’ Indubitably Delivers on Its Promise of Puppies and Dinos

August 11, 2026

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Here they come to PAW the day! (CREDIT: Paramount PIctures and Spinmaster)

Starring: Carter Young, Hayden Chamberlain, McKenna Grace, Henry Bolan, Terry Crews, Ron Pardo, Jennifer Hudson, Fortune Feimster, Bill Nye, Meredith MacNeill, Jameela Jamil, Paris Hilton, Snoop Dogg, Rain Janjua, Lucien Duncan-Reid, William Desrosiers, Nylan Parthipan

Director: Cal Brunker

Running Time: 88 Minutes

Rating: PG for Animals (and Some Humans) in Grave Danger

Release Date: August 14, 2026 (Theaters)

What’s It About?: Those gawdang canine rescuers are back on the big screen! And this time around, they’re teaming up with T-Rexes and Stegosauruses and the like. That’s right, the PAW Patrol have wound up in their very own land that time forgot. It’s quite the idyllic island, with dinos and puppies living in perfect harmony. But like so many peaceful paradises, it’s filled with valuable natural resources that are just begging to be exploited. So once word gets out about Dino Island’s rich supply of diamonds, the Patrol’s old nemesis Mayor Humdinger (Ron Pardo) and his kitty conspirators make their way over to do the exploiting. But these puppies and their new scaly friends aren’t exactly ones to roll over in the face of a direct threat.

What Made an Impression?: Bow Wow Wow Yippie Yo Yippie Yay: I am pleased to report that PAW Patrol: The Dino Movie commences with Snoop Dogg as the patriarch of a yachting family fishing in the middle of the ocean, while his Paris Hilton-voiced wife attempts to grill up dinner on the deck. It’s certainly not unheard of for unlikely celebs to show up in kiddie flicks (just take a look at the rest of this movie’s cast, after all), but this moment is much more surreal than I bargained for. And the only reasonable conclusion is that Snoop must now play a variation of himself in every film aimed at the preschool set.
Sound the Alarm!: Speaking of PAW Patrol‘s target audience, not many major movies are rated G these days, but you might think that this would be one that’s perfectly acceptable for general audiences. Alas, this is in fact a PG feature, and that’s no mistake on the MPA’s part, as the puppies and the dinos and their human companions find themselves in legitimate danger on multiple occasions. I’m talking fire, collapsing structures, and errant cliff diving. It’s not like bodies are being charred to a crisp or like limbs are being torn from torsos. But it is enough to make you realize that playtime is over.
The Spirit of Aesop: Obviously I’m not the target audience for this movie, so I’ll let the toddlers out there decide if this is something they want to drag their parents along to. And ultimately like a lot of movies with this demographic in mind, its entertainment is fundamentally bound with its edification. The main message is the importance of not giving up and believing in yourself even when (or especially when) you’re not perfect. It’s not revolutionary by any means, but it’s certainly sensible enough.

PAW Patrol: The Dino Movie is Recommended If: You’re totally obsessed with the titular creatures

Grade: 3 out of 5 Diamonds

The Hysterical ‘Bliss’ is Here to Warn Us That Reality Isn’t Real, and I Cannot Look Away

February 2, 2021

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Bliss (CREDIT: Hilary Bronwyn Gayle/Amazon Studios)

Starring: Owen Wilson, Salma Hayek, Nesta Cooper, Bill Nye

Director: Mike Cahill

Running Time: 103 Minutes

Rating: R for Some Very Kooky Violence, Profanity, and Sexuality

Release Date: February 5, 2021 (Amazon Prime Video)

Man, how are we so lucky as to get a movie like Bliss? It stars a totally wigged-out Salma Hayek trying to convince Owen Wilson that they’re living in a simulation. And quite frankly, the evidence is immediately pretty convincing, as they seem to be the only people in the world with telekinetic powers, which manifests by them popping their hands out with authority, Bruce Almighty-style. Seriously, there’s an entire scene in which they go to a roller rink and make everyone fall on their asses just for the hell of it. And on top of all that, Bill Nye has a pretty significant part, not as himself, but as a very Bill Nye-type who keeps strong-arming Wilson with some important information. And for all you hardcore perverted philosophy geeks, Slavoj Žižek shows up just long enough for anyone who recognizes him to go, “Oh snap! Slavoj’s in this, too?!”

The only other film directed by Mike Cahill that I’ve seen besides Bliss was 2011’s similarly mindbendy-wendy Another Earth, which I found infuriatingly pretentious. Honestly, Bliss isn’t necessarily any less pretentious in its eagerness to dive into a trendy sci-fi premise in its own vaguely intellectual way. So what’s the difference? Has my cinematic tolerance level just increased significantly in the past ten years? Perhaps, but there’s also the fact that Hayek and Wilson are such inspired left-field casting choices. She is always indefatigably dynamic; give her something to rant about, and you’re not going to be able to keep your eyes off her. As for Wilson, I don’t think he ever utters his signature “Wow,” but that low-key sense of being perpetually stunned is indeed the vibe he gives off the whole time. This is a “two-very-different-tastes-that-go-great-together” situation that we never could have expected would work out as beautifully as it did.

Overall, though, I’m not sure if the ideas of Bliss really come together into anything substantial, and that’s partly because I’m not entirely sure what Cahill is trying to say.  But – and this is important – I don’t particularly care. This is an incorrigible movie, and I’m such a sucker for that sort of energy. While watching, I said to myself, “What is going on?!” a healthy number of times, and I must admit that is a feeling I enjoy experiencing. It’s too often in short supply, but it most certainly is not when Salma Hayek and Owen Wilson are questioning reality, creating their own realities, buying into fake realities, and just generally enjoying free rein to do whatever the hell they want to do.

Bliss is Recommended If You Like: The Matrix but wish it had less kung fu and more makeshift homes on the side of a highway, The “Downtime” episode of the recent Twilight Zone revival, The parts of the X-Men movies where they wave their hands around

Grade: 3.5 out of 5 Blue Crystals