Wes Anderson Invites Us to Look to the Skies in ‘Asteroid City’

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3 Men, 1 Asteroid (CREDIT: Courtesy of Pop. 87 Productions/Focus Features)

Starring: Jason Schwartzman, Jake Ryan, Scarlett Johansson, Grace Edwards, Tom Hanks, Ella Faris, Gracie Faris, Willan Faris, Jeffrey Wright, Tilda Swinton, Bryan Cranston, Edward Norton, Adrien Brody, Liev Schreiber, Hope Davis, Stephen Park, Rupert Friend, Maya Hawke, Steve Carell, Matt Dillon, Hong Chau, Willem Dafoe, Margot Robbie, Tony Revolori, Jeff Goldblum, Sophia Lillis, Fisher Stevens, Ethan Josh Lee, Aristou Meehan, Rita Wilson, Jarvis Cocker, Bob Balaban, Seu Jorge

Director: Wes Anderson

Running Time: 105 Minutes

Rating: PG-13 for Mild Adult Themes and A Shot of Nudity at a Distorted Angle

Release Date: June 16, 2023 (Limited Theaters)/June 23, 2023 (Expands Wide)

What’s It About?: A motley crew of various characters converge in the titular town of Asteroid City in Wes Anderson’s latest ode to symmetry and midcentury vibes. They’re there for the Junior Stargazer convention, and some surprise visitors might just stop by as well. Front and center in the cavalcade are Augie Steenbeck (Jason Schwartzman), a war photographer whose father-in-law (Tom Hanks) keeps reminding him that he needs to tell his son Woodrow (Jake Ryan) and triplet daughters (Ella, Gracie, and Willan Faris) that their mother has recently died. And he’ll have plenty of time to do that now that their car has comically broken down!

In the meantime, he also strikes up a medium-hot rapport with movie star Midge Campbell (Scarlett Johansson), while her brainiac teenage daughter Dinah (newcomer Grace Edwards) and Woodrow form a smarty-pants committee with the other young budding astronomers in town. And it’s also worth noting that Asteroid City doesn’t actually exist, as the movie is presented as a play-within-a-movie, with occasional peeks behind the walls and curtains.

Don’t make an Asteroid out of yourself (CREDIT: Courtesy of Pop. 87 Productions/Focus Features)

What Made an Impression?: To B a Movie: Essentially, Asteroid City seems to be the end result of Wes Anderson watching a whole bunch of 50s and 60s sci-fi B movies and then going, “Okay, what if we made another one of those, but did it a little like this?” This is something that would’ve been called “The Terror in the Skies” back in the day, although in Wes’ version, the real terror comes from all the heavy emotions in our hearts that we haven’t fully confronted yet. But thanks to his signature gentle approach, we feel safe that we’ll get there. It’s the inverse of Nope: instead of freaking out at a potential extraterrestrial, we lean in and start thinking, “Hey there, stranger.”
The Persistence of Memory: Perhaps the most striking scene in Asteroid City (at least from my vantage point) is a memory game played by Woodrow, Dinah, and a few other junior stargazers. They take turns naming a famous person, and these brainiacs all choose some of the most difficult-to-pronounce monikers in the world. Invariably, though, they have no trouble keeping any of them straight. That scene isn’t representative of the entire movie from a plot standpoint, but it does capture the vibe in full.
The Gang’s All There: Asteroid City‘s major movie star cast is as much a bounty of riches as any other Wes Anderson flick, perhaps more than ever. A few of the players just pop in for little more than cameos, and the whole adventure can feel a little overwhelming. There’s a lot packed into just an hour and 45 minutes! On top of that, the play-within-a-movie structure presents more to keep track of than I was expecting. For full digestion, you might want a second viewing, for both intellectual and emotional fulfillment.

Asteroid City is Recommended If You Like: B flicks, Dusty summer camps, Burial ceremonies

Grade: 3.5 out of 5 Stargazers

I Advanced to the Theater to Go See ‘Dungeons & Dragons: Honor Among Thieves’

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So much honorableness in one frame! (CREDIT: Paramount Pictures/Screenshot)

Starring: Chris Pine, Michelle Rodriguez, Justice Smith, Sophia Lillis, Hugh Grant, Chloe Coleman, Regé-Jean Page, Daisy Head, Jason Wong

Directors: Jonathan Goldstein and John Francis Daley

Running Time: 134 Minutes

Rating: PG-13

Release Date: March 31, 2023 (Theaters)

I’ve never played Dungeons & Dragons, so my previous cultural exposure to this franchise is mostly the Community episodes built around it. To the point that in the leadup to seeing Honor Among Thieves, I kept wanting to call it Advanced Dungeons & Dragons. So… was this movie better than the first Greendale edition of D&D? Of course not! But was it better than the sequel episode, “Advanced Advanced Dungeons & Dragons”? Eh, I guess so.

I ate mozzarella sticks and drank Mountain Dew while watching. It turns out that Doing the Dew is about as treacherous as the quest these characters went on.

Grade: A Sufficient Amount of Dragons and Emotional Beats

What’s Our Appetite for ‘Gretel & Hansel’?

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CREDIT: Patrick Redmond/Orion Pictures

Starring: Sophia Lillis, Sam Leakey, Alice Krige, Charles Babalola

Director: Oz Perkins

Running Time: 87 Minutes

Rating: PG-13 for Stylized Pools of Blood

Release Date: January 31, 2020

Once upon a time there was a critic who was skeptical about the prospect of a randomly arriving adaptation of a classic piece of folklore, but he was open to the possibility of being surprised. So he headed into the woods, or rather, a multiplex in the middle of Times Square where he was greeted by The Hunter – the Orion Pictures logo. There was much rejoicing, for this symbolized a legacy of memorable genre cinema.

“I am an independent woman, but I also love my little brother,” said this version of Gretel over and over, or at least she might as well have.

“I loved The VVitch, and I think it’s a good idea to emulate it,” said cinematographer Galo Olivares.

Then The Witch (not The VVitch) appeared, and she lured the children in, as we all knew she would. As she won over her charges with promises of great feasts, she gradually revealed her true nature. She offered Gretel allyship, but at what cost? Was this to be a woke retelling of an evergreen tale?

Not really, but neither is it anti-woke. Sometimes, purely evil forces lurk about to prey on the desperate, and sometimes, satisfying cinematic visions come from the unlikeliest and humblest of places. With decadent set dressing and lavish production design, those hungry for fulfilling fantasy returned home mostly pleased.

Gretel & Hansel is Recommended If You Like: A fantastical feast for the eyes

Grade: 3 out of 5 Ovens

Movie Review: For Better and Worse, ‘IT: Chapter Two’ Goes Full Stephen King

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CREDIT: Brooke Palmer/Warner Bros.

Starring: James McAvoy, Jessica Chastain, Jay Ryan, Bill Hader, Isaiah Mustafa, James Ransone, Andy Bean, Bill Skarsgård, Jaeden Martell, Sophia Lillis, Jeremy Ray Taylor, Finn Wolfhard, Chosen Jacobs, Jack Dylan Grazer, Wyatt Oleff

Director: Andy Muschietti

Running Time: 169 Minutes

Rating: R for Bloody Clown Chomps, A Few Stabbings, Nervous Vomiting, and Creepy Nudity

Release Date: September 6, 2019

IT: Chapter Two is solidly built upon a foundation of a melancholy truth about human existence. When we’re young, we may vow to keep what’s important to us as children just as important when we became adults. But somehow, some way, we all forget some of the things we once held dear, while also remaining stuck in some of the patterns we thought we would eventually grow out of. The Losers Club of Derry, Maine represent the epitome of this mercurial attachment to the past. And so it is that 27 years after their first series of misadventures, they must return to once again defeat the supernatural evil entity that terrorizes their hometown.

This melancholy setup is an apt formula for psychological agony mixing with real in-your-face terror, but the trouble with Chapter Two is that so many of the scares are so scattered from the overarching purpose. Winged insect-bird hybrids popping out of fortune cookies and an old naked lady who turns into a floppy-breasted gargoyle are plenty creepy in and of themselves, but these moments just keep piling onto one another as a series of random horror set pieces, and the effect is eventually exhausting. Even some of the moments that actually feature Pennywise (like a gay couple being beaten up by a mob only to then fall victim to the clown or a cute little girl bonding with Pennywise over facial deformity) are effective mini-movies unto themselves, but they could have easily been cut without losing the main thread involving the Losers. Their story of coming to grips with what won’t leave them alone is effective when the full-to-bursting script actually focuses on them. Ultimately, IT: Chapter Two is decidedly overambitious and overdramatic, but it is a fascinating mess, embracing Stephen King at his weirdest and most extra.

IT: Chapter Two is Recommended If You Like: The most unfiltered Stephen King adaptations

Grade: 2.5 out of 5 Hidden Memories

This Is a Movie Review: IT (2017)

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CREDIT: Warner Bros.

I am surprised that I haven’t come across more (or any) takes of IT that talk about how big a deal abuse is. Because as far as I can tell, that is what the whole thing is all about. Like, I’m pretty sure Pennywise is a metaphor for an entire town poisoned by a legacy of abuse. And that is what makes this movie scary. Every member of the Losers Club has a home life that ranges from sad to actively dangerous, and then when they go out into town, they are beset by shockingly violent bullies, who themselves are the victims of brutish parenting. It makes sense that Bill steps up as the leader, as the worst his dad does is refuse to confront his family’s loss head-on. The relative stability in that unit is allowed to be rocked by the death of younger brother Georgie because abuse has a long tail.

IT often presents its abuses and the responses to it with some combination of baroque and grotesque. Bev’s sexual advances from her father are met with their bathroom being filled with buckets of blood. Eddie’s mother, who fuels his hypochondria, is not just obese, she is so abnormally shaped that it looks like she has a bunch of balloons under her dress. The evil in IT is both morally and aesthetically ugly. In the town of Derry, it only makes sense that a force of pure evil would take the form of a smiling, dancing clown.

I give IT (2017) 400 Floats of 500 Too’s.