
What comes after the [etc., etc.]? (CREDIT: Apple TV+)
Jeff "Jmunney" Malone's Self-Styled "Expert" Thoughts on Movies, TV, Music, and the Rest of Pop Culture
January 12, 2024
Best of 2023, Television Abbott Elementary, American Dad!, Beavis and Butt-Head, Bob's Burgers, Doctor Who, Futurama, Goosebumps, How to with John Wilson, It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, Loki, Poker Face, reservation dogs, Solar Opposites, Succession, The Afterparty, The Other Two Leave a comment

What comes after the [etc., etc.]? (CREDIT: Apple TV+)
January 11, 2024
Cinema, Movie Reviews Angourie Rice, Arturo Perez Jr., Auli'i Cravalho, Avantika, Bebe Wood, Busy Phillips, Christopher Briney, Jaquel Spivey, Jenna Fischer, Mean Girls, Mean Girls 2024, Reneé Rapp, Samantha Jayne, Tim Meadows, Tina Fey 2 Comments

Was this photo taken on a Wednesday? (CREDIT: Jojo Whilden/Paramount © 2023 Paramount Pictures)
Starring: Angourie Rice, Reneé Rapp, Auli’i Cravalho, Christopher Briney, Jaquel Spivey, Bebe Wood, Avantika, Tina Fey, Tim Meadows, Jenna Fischer, Busy Phillips
Directors: Samantha Jayne and Arturo Perez Jr.
Running Time: 112 Minutes
Rating: PG-13 for Zingers That Go for the Jugular
Release Date: January 12, 2024 (Theaters)
What’s It About?: If you’ve been plugged into American pop culture at all in the past 20 years, then surely you know Mean Girls‘ whole deal. This new cinematic edition keeps the same basic narrative structure, so if you already wear pink on Wednesdays, you know what’s coming. In case you need to be initiated, though, here are the essential details: Cady Heron (Angourie Rice) has spent most of her childhood in Kenya, but now that she’s a teenager, her mom (Jenna Fischer) thinks it’s time to move back to America so that Cady can actually have a typical in-person high school experience. She soon attracts the attention of the notorious clique the Plastics: queen bee Regina (Reneé Rapp), desperate-to-please Gretchen (Bebe Wood), and airheaded Karen (Avantika). Cady also develops a more ostensibly genuine friendship with resident outcasts Janis (Auli’i Cravalho) and Damian (Jaquel Spivey), who concoct a revenge scheme to kick Regina off her perch at the top of the social hierarchy. And this time around, there’s singing! That’s right, this Mean Girls is based on the Broadway musical that was based on the original 2004 movie (which was in turn inspired by the parental advice book Queen Bees and Wannabes).
What Made an Impression?: High School is Still a Jungle: A few times while watching nu-Mean Girls, I was plagued by the thought of whether or not we still need a story like this in 2024. After all, aren’t we as a society much more open-minded when it comes to gender and sexual orientation and most other forms of identity? While that may be generally true, it depends on your particular community. Even if you’re lucky enough to grow up in a fully enlightened area, that doesn’t make you emotionally bulletproof. What hasn’t changed in the past couple of decades is our fundamental desire to be accepted by the people who are important to us. So while calling someone gay, for example, might not carry the same sting that it used to (rightly so), we still all have our vulnerabilities, and the folks behind Mean Girls totally understand that the fight against ostracism is a never-ending struggle.
New & Updated (Loopy Edition): I’ve seen the original Mean Girls in its entirety probably only twice or thrice, but I’ve encountered its enduring memes and quotes thousands of times. Which is to say, when this new version diverges onto its own path, it feels like it’s making a point. And that point usually is: don’t you wish we could have phrased that a little bit differently? Tina Fey is the credited screenwriter for both films (as well as the scribe of the book for the stage musical), and that continuity works in the alterations’ favor. And thankfully, while these changes are driven by a moral backbone, they’re not moralizing. The characters are allowed to be messy in a way that teenagers typically are. During moments when it seems like someone is about to declare, “Here are simple instructions for how to be a good person,” they instead say something along the lines of, “I’m on a whole bunch of painkillers right now, so I don’t even know what the heck’s coming out of my mouth.”
Was It a Good Decision to Sing?: If all you know about this version of Mean Girls is what the commercials have shown you, you might not have any idea that this is actually a musical. Regardless of whether or not you’re surprised by this factoid, I’m sure you’d like to know if the songs deliver the goods or not. That of course depends a great deal on your own particular subjective aural tastes. But what’s more objective is how clearly each number and arrangement fits the character of the people performing them. For my money, technical proficiency is less important than personality in musicals, although Mean Girls has plenty of both. Everyone involved knows what they want to say, and they sing their heart’s messages out with abandon.
Mean Girls is Recommended If You Like: TikTok, Memes, Quips, Math, Self-Awareness
Grade: 4 out of 5 Kalteen Bars
January 10, 2024
Cinema, Movie Reviews Bobby Naderi, David Ayer, Emmy Raver-Lampman, Jason Statham, Jeremy Irons, Josh Hutcherson, Minnie Driver, Phylicia Rashad, The Beekeeper Leave a comment

Honey, Honey (CREDIT: Daniel Smith/© 2024 Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer Pictures Inc. All Rights Reserved)
Starring: Jason Statham, Emmy Raver-Lampman, Josh Hutcherson, Bobby Naderi, Jeremy Irons, Minnie Driver, Phylicia Rashad
Director: David Ayer
Running Time: 105 Minutes
Rating: R for Excessively Excessive Violence
Release Date: January 12, 2024 (Theaters)
What’s It About?: After his neighbor Eloise Parker (Phylicia Rashad) is scammed out of millions of dollars in a phishing scheme, a mysterious man known as Adam Clay (Jason Statham) takes it upon himself to wipe out the entire organization preying upon these vulnerable seniors. Meanwhile, Eloise’s FBI agent daughter Verona (Emmy Raver-Lampman) starts investigating both Clay and the people who swindled her mother. It soon becomes clear that everyone is in for a lot more than they bargained for. The scamming operation is run by a tech bro master of the universe jerkoff (Josh Hutcherson) who is connected to some very powerful people, while Mr. Clay is the product of an organization known as “Beekeepers,” who were engineered to root out problems just like this one. But he’s gone rogue, and that does not bode well for anyone standing in his way.
What Made an Impression?: Hooking Our Sympathies: Who among us in 21st Century Planet Earth hasn’t been victimized by intrusive pop-up viruses or pushy call centers? Even if you’ve managed to escape without losing any cash or computer data, you know how much of a nuisance they are. So it’s not hard to understand Clay’s instinct to incinerate where it’s all happening. That has to be one of the most popular revenge fantasies nowadays. So it’s a bit of a shock that that destruction is merely the first blow in the War of Clay vs. The Scammers, instead of the final battle. Where does The Beekeeper go from there to keep the melee coming?
A Study in Extremes: As it turns out, the answer to that question is: turn Jason Statham into a one-man wrecking crew. That’s not exactly a new innovation, but director David Ayer takes the concept to grotesque extremes that I don’t think we’ve ever quite seen before. Where one punch to the head is enough to dispatch a foe, at least three more punches are added. And where the amputation of fingers is presumably enough to teach someone a lesson, he’s instead tied to a car and dragged into the bottom of a river. I suppose the idea being explored here is the consequence of creating super-soldiers, but the mysterious nature of the Beekeepers precludes the script from fully exploring that possibility. Either way, it’s not particularly pleasant to watch Mr. Clay execute his mayhem.
Ironing Out the Details: While I’m often put off by the sour worldview in David Ayer’s films, at least he’s able to attract top-notch talent in front of the camera. Statham can play this type of character in his sleep, and he’s not really being asked to elevate it higher than its B-movie trappings. But in the supporting roles, there is often room to deliver some gravitas, and who better to deliver than Jeremy Irons? With his pristinely pressed suits, he serves as a corporate executive tasked with making sure the operation runs smoothly. That description could also accurately describe the entirety of Irons’ acting career. If we must descend into a grotesque bloodbath, at least let the professionals chaperone us.
The Beekeeper is Recommended If You Like: January pulp, Classically trained actors in lowbrow flicks, Slamming appliances out of frustration
Grade: 2 out of 5 Hives
January 5, 2024
Cinema, Entertainment To-Do List, Podcasts, Television Batman, Boy Swallows Universe, Break Point, Echo, Golden Globes, Grimsburg, Newcomers, Night Swim, Podcasts, RuPaul's Drag Race, Ted, The Great North Leave a comment

Not Pictured: The Boy, or The Swallow (CREDIT: Netflix © 2023)
Every week, I list all the upcoming (or recently released) movies, TV shows, albums, podcasts, etc. that I believe are worth checking out.
Movies
–Night Swim (Theaters)
TV
–RuPaul’s Drag Race Season 16 Premiere (January 5 on MTV)
-Golden Globes (January 7 on CBS)
–Grimsburg Series Premiere (January 7 on FOX) – Detective Jon Hamm.
–The Great North Season 4 Premiere (January 7 on FOX)
–Echo Series Premiere (January 9 on Disney+) – New Marvel show. Maybe I’ll watch.
–Boy Swallows Universe Series Premiere (January 11 on Netflix) – I’m a fan of Phoebe Tonkin.
–Break Point Season 2 (January 11 on Netflix)
–Ted Season 1 (January 11 on Peacock)
Podcasts
–Newcomers Season Premiere – Lauren and Nicole are talking Batman!
January 4, 2024
Cinema, Movie Reviews Amélie Hoeferle, Bryce McGuire, Eddie Martinez, Elijah J. Roberts, Gavin Warren, Jodi Long, Kerry Condon, Nancy Lenehan, Night Swim, Rahnuma Panthaky, Wyatt Russell 1 Comment

Take a dip? (CREDIT: Universal Pictures)
Starring: Wyatt Russell, Kerry Condon, Amélie Hoeferle, Gavin Warren, Nancy Lenehan, Jodi Long, Rahnuma Panthaky, Eddie Martinez, Elijah J. Roberts
Director: Bryce McGuire
Running Time: 98 Minutes
Rating: PG-13 for Creepy Black Goo and A Few Near-Drownings
Release Date: January 5, 2024 (Theaters)
What’s It About?: Professional baseball player Ray Waller (Wyatt Russell) and his wife Eve (Kerry Condon) are shopping for a new home that will hopefully afford him some space to adjust after a recent multiple sclerosis diagnosis forced him to take time away from the game. They settle on a cozy suburban spot with a backyard swimming pool that has a very unusual feature: it’s connected to the groundwater! Also, it’s haunted. However, when Ray takes a dip, it’s more like a fountain of youth, as his symptoms begin to miraculously fade away. Unfortunately the pool has a bit of a tit-for-tat arrangement with all of its owners: for every person it cures, it must consume someone else. That certainly doesn’t bode well for Ray and Eve’s kids Izzy (Amélie Hoeferle) and Elliot (Gavin Warren).
What Made an Impression?: A New Mythology?: For much of Night Swim, I couldn’t help but ask, “When are we going to discover that this pool was built on an ancient burial ground?” While the premise is certainly Poltergeist-y, the aesthetics are more beholden to turn-of-the-20th century J-horror, especially when the strands of dark black hair of previous victims peek through the pool’s filter. But writer-director Bryce McGuire has ultimately crafted his own unique dark parable. It’s an expansion of the short film he made in 2014 (along with Rod Blackhurst, who has a story credit on the feature), but it also feels like it could be drawing from the mythology of some nation or ethnic group that I’m not terribly familiar with. If that’s the case, I’d love to dig deeper into the real-life inspiration. Although as far as I can tell, this was mostly McGuire’s creation. It’s a creepy enough scenario, although I do wish I had been more viscerally freaked out instead of focusing on all this pondering.
Shifting Moods, Shifting Tones: Each member of the Waller clan besides Ray has their own ghostly experience that convinces them that the pool is not to be trusted. But young Elliot is the only one who responds to that realization with much urgency. His older sister and mom do have flashes of taking the threat seriously, but they’re distracted by more earthbound concerns. (Maybe there’s a point being made about losing touch with the supernatural as you get older?) When it eventually gets to a point that they can’t deny what’s right in front of their eyes, they often remain rather stone-faced. Perhaps this family just isn’t very expressive.
It all builds and falls to a rather matter-of-fact resolution despite a notably tragic climax. I don’t know if McGuire ever fully figured out what tone he was aiming for. Or if he did, I’m not sure he clearly conveyed that to his cast. Still, there’s enough creepy imagery and a solidly unnerving premise to make Night Swim worth a lukewarm recommendation despite all the awkwardness.
Night Swim is Recommended If You: Saw all the gunk trapped in a pool filter and then thought, “Hey, what if that’s haunted?”
Grade: 3 out of 5 Marco Polos
January 4, 2024
Best of 2023, Best of TV 2023, Television Beavis and Butt-Head, Best of 2023, Celebrity Jeopardy, Chucky, Clone High, Family Guy, Fargo, Frasier, Generation Gap, Goosebumps, How I Met Your Father, Jeopardy!, Pokémon Concierge, Scott Pilgrim Takes Off, Solar Opposites, The Afterparty, The Muppets Mayhem, The Wonder Years, Whose Line is it Anyway? Leave a comment

CREDIT (Clockwise from Top Left): Paramount Plus/Screenshot; Mitch Haaseth/Disney; Paramount Plus/Screenshot; Apple TV+
For my 2023 TV wrap-up coverage, I’ve decided to compile a list of the shows I was most excited to watch week in and week out. Or day in and day out, in the case of more regular programming. Or in the case of series that released their entire seasons at once, they’re the shows that I was most excited to press play on the next episode button. These aren’t necessarily my favorite shows of the year, though there’s definitely some overlap.
January 2, 2024
Cinema, Monthly Top Cinematic Choices Mean Girls, Mean Girls 2024, Movie preview, Night Swim, The Book of Clarence Leave a comment

Starting a new chapter in 2024 (CREDIT: Moris Puccio/Legendary Entertainment)
They keep making new movies, and some of them are even worth watching. Here’s what’s at the top of the slate for January 2024:
Night Swim: A family moves into a new house, but the swimming pool is haunted. LOL. Better Call Saul‘s Kerry Condon plays the mom!
You can take a Night Swim in theaters beginning on January 5.
January 1, 2024
A Year at the Movies, Cinema 2023, A Year at the Movies, Jeffrey Malone, movies Leave a comment

Hey look, it’s a movie! (PHOTO CREDIT: Bob Malone)
I am become jmunney, Watcher of Movies
(Included with the list of titles are grades, dates, showtimes, theatre locations, and folks I saw the movies with.)
1. M3GAN – A- (1/3, 6:30 PM, AMC Lincoln Square, New York, NY; myself)
2. Broker – B (1/6, 6:50 PM, Regal Essex Crossing, New York, NY; myself)
3. RRR – B+ (1/7, 7:00 PM, Cinema Village, New York, NY; myself)
4. House Party (2023) – C- (1/9, 4:00 PM, Warner Media Screening Room, New York, NY; myself)
5. Missing – B+ (1/12, 6:00 PM, Regal Union Square, New York, NY; myself)
December 29, 2023
Entertainment To-Do List, Television I Can See Your Voice, The Floor, The Twilight Zone Leave a comment

I’m floored. (CREDIT: FOX/Screenshot)
Every week, I list all the upcoming (or recently released) movies, TV shows, albums, podcasts, etc. that I believe are worth checking out.
TV
–The Twilight Zone Marathon (December 30-January 2 on SYFY) – There’s also a T. Zone marathon on the H&I channel.
–The Floor Series Premiere (January 2 on FOX) – A new game show hosted by Rob Lowe. Maybe it’ll be worth checking out?
–I Can See Your Voice Season Premiere (January 3 on FOX)