If You Can Imagine ‘IF,’ the IFs Will Come

May 16, 2024

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If, if, if, uh… (CREDIT: Paramount Pictures)

Starring: Cailey Fleming, Ryan Reynolds, John Krasinski, Fiona Shaw, Alan Kim, Steve Carell, Phoebe Waller-Bridge, Liza Colón-Zayas, Bobby Moynihan, Louis Gosset Jr., Emily Blunt, Matt Damon, Maya Rudolph, Jon Stewart, Sam Rockwell, Sebastian Maniscalco, Christopher Meloni, Awkwafina, Richard Jenkins, Blake Lively, George Clooney, Matthew Rhys, Bradley Cooper, Amy Schumer, Keegan-Michael Key

Director: John Krasinski

Running Time: 104 Minutes

Rating: PG for Mild Potty Humor and Imaginary Nudity

Release Date: May 17, 2024 (Theaters)

What’s It About?: Ever since her mom died, 12-year-old Bea (Cailey Fleming) has pretty much forgotten how to have fun. It certainly doesn’t help that her dad (John Krasinski) is about to undergo heart surgery, though he tries to maintain her childlike wonder with his constant magic tricks and corny gags. While staying at the NYC apartment of her grandmother (Fiona Shaw), she encounters a couple of cartoon characters, as well as their seemingly human partner named Cal (Ryan Reynolds). As it turns out, they’re imaginary friends (or IFs, as they like to be abbreviated), and it’s highly unusual for someone of Bea’s age to be able to see them. But she could really use the power of imagination right now. Or maybe, these supernatural hypothetical creatures could really use the power of Bea right now.

What Made an Impression?: Tina Turner-ing Back the Clock: Baa eventually meets a whole crew of IFs in their hideaway on the Coney Island boardwalk. The encounter is fueled by IF‘s big set piece: an imagination-fueled dance number set to Tina Turner’s 1984 hit “Better Be Good to Me.” Honestly, it’s quite possibly my favorite cinematic choreography since Napoleon Dynamite let loose to some Jamiroquai 20 years ago. If you told me that IF was really just writer-director Krasinski’s excuse to make an entire movie around his own unique tribute to Turner, I would buy it. Such a film did not have to be about imaginary friends, but as it is, it worked out quite swimmingly.
Imaginary Friends, Real Motivation: I wasn’t expecting to tear up at IF, as all indications pointed to it being a simple sugar rush. But its final act lays its thesis out for the taking. As Bea’s journey would have it, imaginary friends aren’t mere fake companions; instead, they’re representations of our innermost desires. We might not be able to “see” them anymore after we grow up, but remaining in touch with them is essential to accomplish our dreams. In that sense, they’re essentially embodiments of everyone’s unique motivations. So the next time you look at a childhood photo or drawing that makes you suddenly remember a big purple monster or a talking ice cube, roll with it. A satisfying life might just depend on it.

IF is Recommended If You Like: Inside Out, Humorless kid protagonists, Tina Turner

Grade: 3.5 out of 5 IFs

‘PAW Patrol: The Mighty Movie’ Aims to Be Super

September 28, 2023

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Here they come to save the day (CREDIT: Spin Master Entertainment, Nickelodeon Movies, and Paramount Pictures)

Starring: Mckenna Grace, Taraji P. Henson, Marsai Martin, Christian Convery, Kim Kardashian, North West, Saint West, Chris Rock, James Marsden, Kristen Bell, Finn Lee-Epp, Ron Pardo, Lil Rel Howery, Serena Williams, Alan Kim, Brice Gonzalez, Luxton Handspiker, Christian Corrao, Callum Shoniker, Nylan Parthipan, Kim Roberts

Director: Cal Brunker

Running Time: 92 Minutes

Rating: PG for Dogs in Danger

Release Date: September 29, 2023 (Theaters)

What’s It About?: Those dang pooches have superpowers now! The long-running canine kids show is back for a second big screen adventure. The PAW Patrol is still faithfully providing all the emergency services for Adventure City, but this time around, a meteor arrives and makes them even mightier than usual (hence the subtitle). But wouldn’t you know it, there’s a meteor expert in town who wants those space rock powers for herself. So she teams up with the ex-mayor/PAW Patrol nemesis to poke those pooches where it hurts. Will they continue to display the sort of teamwork that makes the dream work and stop this dastardly duo?

What Made an Impression?: In this particular review, I am serving as a representative to all you childless adults out there to let you know if there’s any way you could ever possibly be interested in PAW Patrol: The Mighty Movie. (If any kids or parents also happen to read this review, that’s fine, too.) I’ve certainly enjoyed my fair share of entertainment that has a more youthful audience in mind, and I do love dogs of all shapes and sizes. So if you, like me, can summon your inner mutt-loving child, chances are you’ll find The Mighty Movie to be… perfectly pleasant. This is a rather safe movie, in all senses of the word “safe” (with the notable exception of one scene in which one of the PAW Patrol crew gets stuck on a failing plane). It’s not going to drive you nuts, and the wild list of credits is certainly entertaining. It’s a slight net positive for the world, as far as I can tell.

Paw Patrol: The Mighty Movie is Recommended If You Like: Loyalty, duty, mentorism

Grade: 3 out of 5 Meteors

‘Minari’ Features One of the Greatest Cinematic Grandmother-Grandson Stories of All Time

February 8, 2021

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Minari (CREDIT: Josh Ethan Johnson/A24)

Starring: Steven Yeun, Han Ye-ri, Alan Kim, Noel Kate Cho, Youn Yuh-jung, Will Patton

Director: Lee Isaac Chung

Running Time: 115 Minutes

Rating: PG-13 for Some Hilariously Surprising Potty Humor

Release Date: February 12, 2021 (Theaters)/February 26, 2021 (On Demand)

Minari is the heartwarming tale of a boy and his kooky grandma, who at first don’t get along very well. She’s not your typical grandma, and he only wants her around if she’ll bake cookies and offer hugs freely. But alas, she has zero culinary skills and would much rather dish out zingers than physical affection. I suppose I should also mention the tension between the boys’ parents, but I’d really prefer to focus my review pretty much exclusively on the grandma stuff. The title “Minari” refers to a wort plant native to East Asia, but if I had been in charge of naming this movie, I would have christened it “Mountain Water,” which is what the soda-guzzling grandma calls her beloved Mountain Dew. And that’s very important information, because the most memorable scene involves a new way of, shall we say, “doing the Dew.”

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