‘A Thousand and One’ Review: Who is This Mother?

March 28, 2023

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One, Two, A Thousand and One (CREDIT: Courtesy of Focus Features)

Starring: Teyana Taylor, Will Catlett, Josiah Cross, Aven Courtney, Aaron Kingsley Adetola

Director: A.V. Rockwell

Running Time: 116 Minutes

Rating: R for People Yelling at Each Other

Release Date: March 31, 2023 (Theaters)

What’s It About?: In 1994, a young woman named Inez (Teyana Taylor) is released from Rikers Island and determined to get her life back on track. She quickly locates her six-year-old son Terry (Aaron Kingsley Adetola, and then Aven Courtney at age 13 and Josiah Cross at age 17) and pulls him out of the foster care system. Over the course of the ensuing decade, Mother and Son, as well as Inez’s longtime partner Lucky (Will Catlett), weather the challenges of a crappy New York City apartment, the violence of the streets, and terminal health diagnoses. All the while, Inez is constantly looking over her shoulder in the chance that the authorities will expose whatever she’s up to. Terry can sense something fishy, but he has no idea about the full extent of the truth about who he really is.

What Made an Impression?: A Thousand and One puts a ton of dramatic weight on the shoulders of Taylor, whom I know primarily from Kanye West’s “Fade” music video and as the Firefly from Season 7 of The Masked Singer. She does have several other credits to her name, but this is by far the most demanding on-screen role of her career thus far. And she rises to the occasion! Some people just have star quality, plain and simple, and Taylor is one of those stellar folks.

But while my feelings towards Taylor are pretty clear-cut, I’m more ambivalent about this genre of film overall. While watching stories of people struggling to get by, I often find myself wondering, “Is this overly exploitative?” and “Is this even meant to be entertaining, or just challenging?” A Thousand and One certainly doesn’t answer these questions; instead, it merely brings them back to the fore. Writer-director A.V. Rockwell paints a vivid portrait, but not a particularly unique one.

What is unique, however, is a heartbreaking, clarifying final act. Terry eventually does find the answers he’s always deserved, and it’s quite the treat to see this movie pull off such a surprise in a genre that’s not especially known for its twisty reveals. But if done properly, it works no matter what type of story you’re trying to tell. It’s a matter of editing and rhythm, and A Thousand and One nails its final decrescendo.

A Thousand and One is Recommended If You Like: Recently bygone eras of NYC

Grade: 3.5 out of 5 Leaky Pipes

‘John Wick: Chapter 4’ Somehow Pulls Off the Trick of Going Both Epic and Scaled-Down

March 23, 2023

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I’m thinking he’s back. (CREDIT: Murray Close)

Starring: Keanu Reeves, Donnie Yen, Bill Skarsgård, Ian McShane, Laurence Fishburne, Hiroyuki Sanada, Shamier Anderson, Lance Reddick, Rina Sawayama, Scott Adkins

Director: Chad Stahelski

Running Time: 169 Minutes

Rating: R for The Usual Hail of Bullets and Blades

Release Date: March 24, 2023

What’s It About?: John Wick is finally getting out of the game, somehow someway. Keanu Reeves’ superhuman assassin has had everything he loves ripped away, and now he’s excommunicated from his deadly vocation and thereby marked for the grave. Although, if memory serves correctly, I’m pretty sure this latest excommunication is just adding to a pile of excommunications. I guess we’ve reached Double Secret Probation Excommunication at this point. Anyway, for this go-round, John is completely in go-for-broke mode. He’s going to escape the clutches of the High Table, the ruling council that controls everything, or die trying. Meanwhile, Bill Skarsgård is on hand as the Marquis Vincent de Gramont, the dandiest of dastardly villains who likes to keep all his pretty pawns in place. Will John’s friends help him out, or will they too be forced to kill him? Either way, the bullets (and all the other cleverly improvised killing devices) will be flying.

What Made an Impression?: The John Wick series has a legion of fans thanks to its boundless swagger and pizazz. But it’s never quite won me over, due in no small part to its overwhelming acoustics. Furthermore, as the mythology expanded with each successive entry, I found myself caring less and less about the codes and rituals of this assassin culture. In the wake of Chapter 4, I wouldn’t say I’m a convert, but I can at least appreciate it as an achievement of singular craftsmanship and vision.

The running time is nearly three hours, which represents a gradual ballooning over the course of the franchise, as the first one clocked in at a mere 1 hour and 40 minutes. But it never feels bloated; quite the opposite, in fact. There’s a lot to accomplish and plenty of globe-hopping, but the mission is lean and focused. And the minutiae of the mythology is toned way down, so if you missed the first three, or forgot all the details, you can dive right in and still get the gist. And for those of you hardcore Wick-ians, there’s plenty new to love here, especially Donnie Yen as a blind assassin with unparalleled acrobatic lethality. It’s a colorful world of killers out there, and they’re all digging into the delectable feast.

John Wick: Chapter 4 is Recommended If You Like: This clip from a Japanese game show

Grade: 3.5 out of 5 Bounties

Willem Dafoe is Stuck ‘Inside’ – Should You Join Him?

March 15, 2023

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Knock Knock. Who’s ‘Inside’? Willem Dafoe. Willem Dafoe Who? Willem Dafriend. (CREDIT: Courtesy of Focus Features)

Starring: Willem Dafoe

Director: Vasilis Katsoupis

Running Time: 105 Minutes

Rating: R, Because Weird Things Happen When You’re Stuck All Alone in a Penthouse

Release Date: March 17, 2023 (Theaters)

What’s It About?: Have you ever wanted to be endlessly trapped in a penthouse apartment with Willem Dafoe? Then Inside is the movie for you! Although, that promise of companionship might not be all it’s cracked up to be. Dafoe plays Nemo, an art thief who finds himself in accidental solitary confinement when an attempted heist becomes completely pear-shaped. The penthouse’s security system goes haywire (or maybe this is exactly how it’s supposed to work when an intruder arrives), and Nemo’s associates on the outside immediately abandon him. There’s basically no hope of escape, and any flash of hope that Nemo can signal someone on the outside for help is merely that, just a flash. But at least there’s plenty of expensive art to keep him company!

What Made an Impression?: I know I’m not the only one who thinks of Willem Dafoe as “Willem Da Friend.” What I’m trying to say is, I’m always happy when he’s on my screen. But it turns out that it’s a big ask to watch just about anyone wasting away in such relentless isolation. I’d like to believe that there are interesting ways to keep someone trapped, but Inside struck me as mostly tedious. It has some ideas on its mind, but nothing really tickled my philosophical bone.

At the beginning of the film, Nemo recalls in voiceover a time he was asked as a child what three things he would save if his house were on fire. At the time, he settled upon an AC/DC CD, his cat, and his sketchbook. Looking back on that moment, he now seems less fond of the Australian rockers and the meowing critter, but he firmly believes that “art is for keeps.” Perhaps his current predicament is meant as a test of that theory? If it is, we never really see him grapple with any sort of existential conundrum. Sure, he gradually loses his sanity, but that would probably happen to anybody in his situation, no matter what their feelings about art.

The one element of Inside that I unreservedly enjoyed was the refrigerator that plays the “Macarena” (of 90s dance craze fame) whenever it’s opened. If we had gotten an hour and a half of Dafoe boogieing along with Los Del Rio, instead of just a few minutes, I think I would have bit just a bit harder. If my house were on fire, I would want to ensure that “Macarena” makes it out alive. Luckily, I wouldn’t have to worry, because there’s no way you can burn away the indelible spirit it’s left on all of humanity. Inside doesn’t fully emphasize the power of the Macarena, but it certainly doesn’t dispute it either, and that’s the message I’m choosing to focus on.

Inside is Recommended If You Like: Insisting that everything is art

Grade: 2 out of 5 CCTVs

Ant-Man and the Wasp: Review-a-mania

March 12, 2023

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Oh my God, Ant-Man admit it! (CREDIT: Marvel Entertainment/Screenshot)

Starring: Paul Rudd, Evangeline Lilly, Kathryn Newton, Jonathan Majors, Michael Douglas, Michelle Pfeiffer, David Dastmalchian, Katy O’Brian, William Jackson Harper, Bill Murray, Corey Stoll

Director: Peyton Reed

Running Time: 124 Minutes

Rating: PG-13

Release Date: February 17, 2023 (Theaters)

I liked the beginning of Ant-Man and the Wasp: Quantumania, because it was bright and sunny, both literally and metaphorically. I also liked the end, because it was once again bright and sunny. But I didn’t like the parts in the Quantum Realm as much, because they were quite dark. I saw it two days after my birthday, and it definitely wasn’t the best birthday movie, so it’s good that I didn’t see it on the exact anniversary of my expulsion from a uterus.

While the credits were unspooling, a youngster of about six told his dad, “I hate this movie,” as he walked past me. I try not to hate, but I kept holding my head at a weird angle while watching, and that wasn’t good for my neck. Both literally and metaphorically.

Grade: Infinity Plus 3 out of Infinity Times 2 Kangs

’65’ Shines a Little Less Brightly Than Sixty-Five Stars

March 9, 2023

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Adam Driver stars in 65. (CREDIT: Patti Perret/Sony Pictures Entertainment)

Starring: Adam Driver, Ariana Greenblatt, Chloe Coleman, Nika King

Directors: Scott Beck and Bryan Woods

Running Time: 93 Minutes

Rating: PG-13 for Dino Chompers and Biting Bugs

Release Date: March 10, 2023 (Theaters)

What’s It About?: They called the movie 65, but it’s worth a lot more than that. Indeed, add several zeros after that title, as it takes place 65 million years ago. A couple of humans lead the cast, but it’s the time of the dinosaurs on Planet Earth. Time travel isn’t on the docket, but intergalactic transport instead, as a pilot named Mills (Adam Driver) is on a mission to find a cure for his sick daughter (Chloe Coleman). But it all goes kablooey when his ship crashes on unfamiliar terra, where he soon finds himself at war with a bunch of rexes and raptors, and more than a couple of hungry insects. And in his care is the only other surviving passenger, a young girl named Koa (Ariana Greenblatt) who doesn’t speak the same language as Mills but is with him all the way.

What Made an Impression?: By major studio sci-fi standards, 65 is fairly low-budget, which you can definitely feel. The lighting is often dim, and we rarely see full shots of the larger dinos. That’s not necessarily a death knell if the human drama is compelling, but alas, there aren’t really any fireworks there either. Driver and Greenblatt have an easy rhythm, but that’s just the thing – it’s too easy. It’s not like there needs to be any major conflict in this sort of guardian-child relationship, but every triumph feels preordained. Mills and Koa are very much in mortal danger the whole time, but you never feel that viscerally.

So what to do with a functionally well-made movie that doesn’t really thrill or inspire? Well, I sat in the theater peacefully for an hour and a half and was grateful that I had an occasion to get out of the house. I was less happy, however, about the skittering and screeching sound effects that disrupted my physiological equilibrium. But that was more of a minor nuisance than anything particularly terrible. To reiterate, 65 didn’t make me feel very strongly in either direction. Maybe if you’re a completist when it comes to sci-fi spacefaring or dino-heavy larks, you can find something worthwhile here, but otherwise, there’s not much to get excited about here.

65 is Recommended If You Like: Genre Fare and you’re not too demanding

Grade: 2 out of 5 Laser Blasts

‘Scream VI’ Takes as Many Bites Out of The Big Apple as Possible

March 8, 2023

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Scream If You Know What You’re Doing March 10 (CREDIT: Paramount Pictures and Spyglass Media Group)

Starring: Melissa Barrera, Jenna Ortega, Courteney Cox, Jasmin Savoy Brown, Mason Gooding, Hayden Panettiere, Dermot Mulroney, Devyn Nekoda, Liana Liberato, Jack Champion, Josh Segarra, Samara Weaving, Tony Revolori, Henry Czerny, Roger L. Jackson

Directors: Matt Bettinelli-Olpin and Tyler Gillett

Running Time: 123 Minutes

Rating: R for Sharp Weapons and Blunt Profanity

Release Date: March 10, 2023 (Theaters)

What’s It About?: The Ghostface Killer is a virus that simply refuses to die. After 2022’s Scream rebooted the mayhem in Woodsboro with as much wit and fury as ever, the survivors are finally heading out of California and all the way across the country to New York City. Tara (Jenna Ortega), Mindy (Jasmin Savoy Brown), and Chad (Mason Gooding) are in college, while Tara’s big sis Sam (Melissa Barrera) has also settled down in the city to keep an eye on everyone. Yes, horror faithful, it’s true, the new kids have finally inherited the franchise. After taking a scaled-back role in the last outing, Sidney Prescott is finally nowhere to be seen (which is perhaps creatively justifiable, but has more to do with Neve Campbell’s financial dissatisfaction with what she was offered). But there are a couple of legacy characters on hand, with Gail Weathers (Courteney Cox) as indefatigable as ever, and Scream 4 breakout Kirby Reed (Hayden Panettiere) re-emerging as a battle-hardened FBI agent. And those youngsters are going to need all the help they can get, because this might just be the most brutal Ghostface yet.

What Made an Impression?: Scream has always been the most successful self-aware horror franchise, and with the fifth edition, it expanded its scope to reboots and toxic film culture at large. So where does that leave Scream VI to possibly go from here? The short answer: it’s the “sequel to the requel,” which could very well mean a remake of sorts of the first sequel. And like Scream 2, VI has the college setting and the potential for a revenge scheme. Other than that, the plot isn’t exactly repeated, but there’s only so much room to navigate if this series wants to proclaim anything that it hasn’t yet declared.

So with those restrictions in place, VI lives or dies by the strength of its kills and mystery. Regarding the former, it’s stunningly braven. The Ghostface murderers have never been shy about wantonly stabbing their way through the entire run time, but it hits a little differently in a setting as crowded as NYC. When a killer chases Tara and Sam into a bodega and proceeds to mutilate everyone in there, I’m mostly wondering how there aren’t immediately thousands of witnesses. Also, there’s a shotgun behind the counter, which I hope isn’t true of the bodegas I frequent, but now I’m a little concerned. On the other hand, a Ghostface attack on the subway hasn’t changed my mind about that mode of transport – it remains a hellhole that I’ll continue to proudly frequent as often as possible.

And in terms of the mystery, the same cardinal rule still applies: literally anyone could be one of the killers! Sure, the heroes from the previous films are probably exempt from suspicion, although Sam’s backstory as the daughter of O.G. Ghostface Billy Loomis at least teases the possibility that that may not be the case. But other than that, suspicion really is cast on everyone, and I continue to be amazed at this series’ knack for keeping us on our toes. As suspects are eliminated or present seemingly airtight alibis, we’re all left wondering who is possibly left to be the culprit. Without giving anything away, the ultimate reveal is thrilling, stylish, and delightfully choreographed.

But while we’re on the subject of spoilers, I’m happy to give away the fact that Josh Segarra, here introduced as a potential love interest for Sam, is just as much of a sweetie pie as he is on the Comedy Central sitcom The Other Two. (And in the interest of avoiding spoilers, I’ll reiterate that that may or may not have nothing or anything to do with whether or not he could be Ghostface.)

So where does Scream go from here? The floor has thus far proved to be incredibly durable, but can it endure indefinitely? The absence of Sidney is sorely felt, and the dialogue isn’t always as sharp as it’s been in the past, but there’s still plenty to love here. I’m reminded a bit of the Fast and Furious franchise, as Scream is showing off a knack for expansiveness and rebooting beloved characters as needed, although without any room (thus far) for resurrections or redemptions. So maybe Campbell could return some day. Maybe Ghostface will eventually go to space. Maybe there’ll be an avenging protector Ghostface who protects everyone from all the evil Ghostfaces. Whatever direction it goes, I’m pretty sure something interesting will happen.

Scream VI is Recommended If You Like: Taking a chance on a new direction while still maintaining a connection to the past

Grade: 3.5 out of 5 Unmaskings

Mad March Movie Review: Woody Harrelson Teams Up with a Bunch of Unlikely Basketball ‘Champions’

March 7, 2023

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They are the Champions (CREDIT: Shauna Townley/Focus Features)

Starring: Woody Harrelson, Kaitlin Olson, Ernie Hudson, Cheech Marin, Matt Cook, Madison Tevlin, Joshua Felder, Kevin Iannucci, Ashton Gunning, Matthew Von Der Ahe, Tom Sinclair, James Day Keith, Alex Hintz, Casey Metcalfe, Bradley Edens, Champ Pederson

Director: Bobby Farrelly

Running Time: 123 Minutes

Rating: PG-13 for Mild Farrelly-Style Crude Humor

Release Date: March 10, 2023 (Theaters)

What’s It About?: You know, coaching basketball is a very stressful job. Emotions run high in any sport, and this one has the added disadvantage of all that body heat being trapped inside a stadium. So it’s no wonder that there have been multiple movies and TV shows (as well as real-life examples) of basketball coaches spectacularly falling from grace. The latest example of this trope is Champions, a remake of a 2018 Spanish film of the same name (or Campeones in its native tongue), in which Woody Harrelson plays Marcus, a minor league coach who has dreams of breaking into the NBA. Instead, a night of drunk driving leads him to spending most of his time fulfilling his community service duties in the hinterlands of Iowa by leading a local amateur team made up of players with intellectual disabilities.

What Made an Impression?: Sports movies that focus on team efforts rise (or sink) by the strength (or weakness) of their personalities. And the guys on the roster of Champions might have Down syndrome or traumatic brain injuries or other related conditions, but that hardly means they won’t leave an impression on the people around them. Marcus is a little ignorant about them initially, but he’s won over quickly. This is obviously a movie about the triumph of the human spirit, but it doesn’t underline that point egregiously. Instead of wasting time on Marcus constantly saying the wrong thing, he mostly just bonds with his players over a shared love of the game. Still, it’s certainly an adjustment for a guy with NBA aspirations, but witnessing him figuring it out and embracing it is the whole attraction.

Anyway, if you’re an aficionado of the genre, or even if you have just a passing awareness of sports movies, you can probably see where this is all headed. The team improbably makes their way to the championship, the coach is tempted by greener pastures in another town far far away, and there might just be someone who’s captured his heart for good measure (in this case, she’s played by It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia‘s Kaitlin Olson). Champions has no intention of reinventing the formula; instead, its purpose is all about giving some new players the opportunity to have their own Rudy/Rocky/Jimmy Chitwood moment. If you’re looking for that sort of wholesome entertainment, with a generous helping of potty humor thrown in for good measure, then Champions has you covered. And if your curiosity is also piqued by SportsCenter spending an inordinate amount of time covering the saga of Special Olympians, with actual ESPN personalities playing themselves, then you’re in luck once again!

Champions is Recommended If You Like: The usual suspects when it comes to inspirational triumphs of the human spirit

Grade: 3 out of 5 Double Dribbles

It’s a Battle with the Past in ‘Creed III’

March 2, 2023

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Majors v. Jordan: who do ya got? (CREDIT: : Eli Ade/© 2023 Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer Pictures)

Starring: Michael B. Jordan, Jonathan Majors, Tessa Thompson, Alex Henderson, Spence Moore II, Wood Harris, Florian Munteanu, Phylicia Rashad, Mila Davis-Kent

Director: Michael B. Jordan

Running Time: 116 Minutes

Rating: PG-13 for The Violence of the Game

Release Date: March 3, 2022 (Theaters)

What’s It About?: Adonis Creed (Michael B. Jordan, Alex Henderson in flashbacks) has hung up his gloves and turned his focus towards training other fighters. But we’re all savvy enough to know what’s coming next. Something’s always lurking around the corner to pull the hero back in. In this case, it’s a surprise from the past in the form of childhood friend Damian Anderson (Jonathan Majors, Spence Moore II in flashbacks), who was once a promising boxer himself before a lengthy prison stay on weapons charges. Despite his advanced age by boxing standards, Dame his sights set on the heavyweight title, and that unhinged ambition threatens to wreck the stability of Adonis’ personal and professional lives.

What Made an Impression?: Creed III marks Jordan’s directorial debut, and he certainly puts his visual stamp on the action within the ring. Slo-mos and zooms zip around the open space to emphasize every inch of pummeling these shirtless bodies endure. This movie absolutely does not shy away from the blood and bruises inherent to the subject matter. This isn’t a revolutionary take, but it is an effective one, and I found myself wincing more than I’d hoped to. And with that in mind, I couldn’t help but wonder if we as a species should just retire boxing once and for all. Now, I’m no expert on the sport’s modern rules and regulations, so maybe there are sufficient precautions to prevent any tragedies. But it’s still a fundamentally violent pursuit, and Creed III very much underscored that truth.

As for the relationship drama, it’s positively Shakespearean, and deployed with maximum operatic tumult. Dame is like a Falstaff cast out of the kingdom, but much more dangerous than that jolly royal companion. I was a little surprised by just how animalistic Majors allowed himself to be. At this point, Creed has established its own identity separate from its Rocky origin, and that was true even before Sylvester Stallone decided to sit this chapter out. Even so, Creed III has no interest in forgoing the standard training montage and climactic title bout. But when the storytelling instincts are so strong, and the actors are so unflinchingly committed, the power of the straightforward storytelling comes through.

Creed III is Recommended If You Like: Letters from prison, ASL conversations, Yet another training montage

Grade: 3.5 out of 5 Title Matches

‘Operation Fortune: Ruse de Guerre’ is Impressively Confusing

March 1, 2023

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Which one’s Ruse? (CREDIT: Dan Smith/Lionsgate)

Starring: Jason Statham, Aubrey Plaza, Cary Elwes, Josh Hartnett, Hugh Grant, Eddie Marsan, Bugzy Malone, Peter Ferdinando

Director: Guy Ritchie

Running Time: 114 Minutes

Rating: R for Spies Being Spies

Release Date: March 3, 2023 (Theaters)

What’s It About?: Would you watch a movie in which the motley crew of Jason Statham, Aubrey Plaza, and Cary Elwes team up together for some espionage? What if we also threw Josh Hartnett into the mix as one of the biggest movie stars in the world? And what if Hugh Grant played the billionaire arms dealer they have in their crosshairs? Well, that might all sound ridiculous, but it’s exactly what Operation Fortune: Ruse de Guerre has to offer. Will the plot make any sense, or will everyone be too stylish and quippy to even care about something like logic?

What Made an Impression?: I often find espionage movies difficult to parse, and I know I’m not the only one. In a way, that’s the nature of the genre.With all the subterfuge and double-crossings, these stories tend to be opaque by design. And Operation Fortune really takes the cake in that regard, because pretty much immediately I had no idea what was happening. Who are these spies? What country, if any, do they work for? What disaster are they trying to prevent? Does anything even matter?

That confusion isn’t necessarily a problem, especially if you have style and wit to spare, but it’s also nice to have a sense of something resembling a base reality. Instead, the Operation Fortune engine plows forward without letting us know its origin or destination. It’s so ill-defined that I was positively shocked when Guy Ritchie was revealed as the director during the credits. It certainly features some of his trademarks and regular players, but it also feels so out to sea that I could hardly believe that it was actually made by someone so familiar.

Anyway, even though I abandoned all hope of ever understanding what was happening, I at least held out hope that I might be entertained. That happened sporadically, with Plaza providing her trademark bitterly playful edge, which is a new flavor for Ritchie World. And at one point Cary Elwes says something that I’m pretty sure was meant as a subtle reference to The Princess Bride‘s poison cup scene. Other than that, everyone in the cast seemed to be enjoying themselves, while I was left out in the cold crying, “I wish I knew what was going on!”

Operation Fortune: Ruse de Guerre is Recommended If You Like: Hugh Grant being a total dirtbag

Grade: 2 out of 5 Hard Drives

They Finally Made a Movie Out of the ‘Cocaine Bear’

February 23, 2023

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Cocaine Bear Gonna Cocaine Bear (CREDIT: Universal Studios)

Starring: Keri Russell, O’Shea Jackson Jr., Alden Ehrenreich, Ray Liotta, Christian Convery, Brooklynn Prince, Isiah Whitlock Jr., Margo Martindale, Jesse Tyler Ferguson, Aaron Holliday, Kristofer Hivju

Director: Elizabeth Banks

Running Time: 95 Minutes

Rating: R for A Trail of Terrifyingly Bloody Drug-Fueled Destruction

Release Date: February 24, 2022 (Theaters)

What’s It About?: A bear did cocaine. A BEAR did cocaine! A bear did COCAINE! A bear DID cocaine!

A BEAR DID COCAINE!

This is a movie that certainly delivers on the premise of its title. After a botched bit of drug trafficking leaves a duffel bag full of cocaine unsupervised in a Georgia park, a black bear ingests mass quantities of the powder and proceeds to become supernaturally aggressive. A park ranger, some teenage miscreants, a single mom and her young daughter and her daughter’s friend, and a couple of hikers all get caught in the path of the rampage, while the guys who are on the hook for the stash go to extreme lengths to retrieve it. What could possibly go right?!

What Made an Impression?: After watching a film like Cocaine Bear, I find it helpful to paraphrase the classic movie-mocking show Mystery Science Theater 3000 by utilizing the mantra “Just repeat to myself: It’s just a movie, I should really just relax.” Except, in this case, this nightmare is actually based on a true story. Very loosely based on a true story, though, so we can still remain at ease. In the real version, the bear died before it had the chance to do any sort of damage. Still, despite the fantastical exaggeration, the movie has a rather grounded feel to it that serves as a reminder about how we’re all living – for now – at the mercy of nature.

Let me be absolutely clear (if I haven’t been already): this is one of the most graphically violent mainstream American movies I’ve seen in quite some time. Body parts are torn off and tossed aside with ease, while guts are exposed as a feast for cubs. And it’s made all the more distressing by the fact that we get to know pretty much all of the victims before they meet their demises. Sometimes extreme cinema is positively invigorating; other times, it makes me ask: should I be watching this?

While Cocaine Bear made me reckon with mortality more than I was expecting it to, I could at least appreciate the craft and the commitment. The use of CGI in the bear is obvious and occasionally dodgy in close-ups, but in a way that counterintuitively works. It feels like a cartoon has invaded the physical realm in the worst way possible. And then there are the performances, which dial up the Southern-fried quirks in about half the cast, and then you have the more grounded work, particularly by Ray Liotta in one of his final on-screen appearances. Even in a film as outlandish as this one, in which he’s playing a drug trafficker sporting a gloriously coiffed mane that’s wilder than any woodland creature’s, he finds the genuine motivating oomph. Simply put, we’re in good hands with him, as he forges a true connection in a situation where everything could easily go off the rails in every direction. So come for the brute-force premise, and stay for the subtle surprises.

Cocaine Bear is Recommended If You Like: Piranha, Anaconda, Lake Placid, 80s Rock ‘n’ Roll

Grade: 3 out of 5 Duffel Bags

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