I Have Come to the Following Conclusion After Seeing ‘Elio’

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Two Movie Characters with Four-Letter First Names (CREDIT: Pixar)

Starring: Yonas Kibreab, Zoe Saldaña, Remy Edgerly, Brad Garrett, Jameela Jamil, Shirley Henderson, Brendan Hunt, Matthias Schweighöfer, Brandon Moon, Naomi Watanabe, Ana de la Reguera, Anissa Borrego, Archival Recordings of Carl Sagan

Directors: Madeline Sharafian, Domee Shi, and Adrian Molina

Running Time: 98 Minutes

Rating: PG

Release Date: June 20, 2025 (Theaters)

Now that I’ve seen Elio, I have a confession to make: I spent nearly the first half of the movie thinking that Elio’s Aunt Olga was voiced by America Ferrera. But then I remembered seeing Zoe Saldaña’s name in the promotional leadup, and I was like, “Oh yeah, that’s right.” But then I found out that Ferrera was originally supposed to play that part! So anyway, that’s my biggest takeaway from this movie. Also, Elio’s a cool dude, and I’m glad that he made friends, and I’m also glad that he realized how much Olga cares about him.

Grade: 37 Glortons out of 53 Blorgons

Entertainment To-Do List: Week of 6/20/25

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Every week, I list all the upcoming (or recently released) movies, TV shows, albums, podcasts, etc. that I believe are worth checking out.

Movies
Elio (Theaters)
28 Years Later (Theaters)

Music
-Benson Boone, American Heart
-Haim, I quit
-U.S. Girls, Scratch It

Sports
-NBA Draft (June 25-26 on ABC [First Round Only] and ESPN) – I’m most interested to see where a couple of Scarlet Knights end up.

’28 Years Later’ Reveals What It’s Like to Rebuild Society Around the Rage Virus

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What would you do if Ralph Fiennes handed you a skull? (CREDIT: Miya Mizuno/Columbia Pictures)

Starring: Alfie Williams, Jodie Comer, Aaron Taylor-Johnson, Ralph Fiennes, Edvin Ryding, Jack O’Connell

Director: Danny Boyle

Running Time: 115 Minutes

Rating: R for Zombie Violence and Graphic Zombie Nudity

Release Date: June 20, 2025 (Theaters)

What’s It About?: In 2002, a little movie called 28 Days Later was released, introducing us to the Rage virus, which turned those infected into high-speed zombie-like creatures. Now it’s 23 years later, but a little bit more time has passed in this fictional world. And so, 2025 delivers to moviegoers 28 Years Later, in which the virus has been beaten back on continental Europe, while the United Kingdom remains under quarantine and left to fend for itself. This is the only world that 12-year-old Spike (Alfie Williams) has ever known, as he lives on a Rage-free island village along with his dad Jamie (Aaron Taylor-Johnson) and chronically ill mom Isla (Jodie Comer). Intrepid souls occasionally travel to the mainland across a causeway for supplies while fending off the infected that freely roam about. With Spike now old enough to make the trip, he determines that he must track down a legendary doctor (Ralph Fiennes) to get his mom a diagnosis. Meanwhile, a few of the Rage zombies have leveled up with some of their own unique abilities.

What Made an Impression?: Out of Time: I only saw 28 Days Later for the first time a couple of years ago, but I already knew long before then that the cinematic landscape had been inimitably altered by its influence. Pretty much every zombie flick, post-apocalypse film, and general actioner owes it a massive debt. You could even argue that it’s influenced 21st century culture at large more than any other movie besides The Matrix. But while it’s timeless in that regard, it also feels very much of its moment. There’s no way that 28 Years could recreate that phenomenon, nor does it try to. But it does recreate its milieu on screen, and that’s a whose choice, considering how this is a world that has been essentially stuck in time for a full generation. I’m not saying that director Danny Boyle and screenwriter Alex Garland have been grappling with the Rage-iverse every day for the past couple of decades, but it is clear that some significant parts of their souls never left. If this franchise means anything to you, you’ll surely feel the same way
Life is Combat: Several of the early scenes are interspersed with clips of what appear to be old British wartime propaganda videos, as well as movie scenes depicting war throughout the centuries. Life in the village is basically like ancient Sparta with a hint of The Wicker Man, where the threat is ravenous flesh-eaters instead of rival city-states. The vintage footage feels satirical, but also like a Zen acceptance of reality.
Memento Mori et Amori: Perhaps the most striking image of 28 Years Later is the one on its poster: a tower of skulls, consisting of the remains of both the infected and the uninfected. In the midst of inescapable violence, Boyle and Garland advise us once again to look to the ancients, specifically the concept of “memento mori,” Latin for “remember to die.” But add just one letter to that and it becomes “memento amori”: remember to love. In the midst of whatever catastrophe we’re living through, we must also embrace each other.
Surprise!: As I conclude this review, I look back to my state of mind as I anticipated this sequel’s arrival. Would it expand the lore, or would we perhaps get closer to a cure for the Rage virus? But of all the possibilities I considered, none of them were anywhere close to what we ended up with. That’s not to say that the setting or the characters are vastly different from 28 Years‘ predecessors, just that its winding plot path is thrillingly unpredictable and that I was happy to embrace the uncertainty.

28 Years Later is Recommended If You Like: A new chapter that raises more questions than it answers

Grade: 4 out of 5 Teletubbies

Will ‘Dangerous Animals’ Have You Saying, ‘I Also Like to Live Dangerously’?

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PICTURED: A Dangerous Animal (CREDIT: Mark Taylor/Independent Film Company and Shudder)

Starring: Hassie Harrison, Jai Courtney, Josh Heuston, Ella Newton, Liam Greinke, Rob Carlton

Director: Sean Byrne

Running Time: 98 Minutes

Rating: R

Release Date: June 6, 2025 (Theaters)

What are the chances that you’ll watch Dangerous Animals and come away thinking, “Now I want to go swim with the sharks!” Hopefully 100%. But probably not, though. The plot is, after all, about a guy played by Jai Courtney who lures people onto his boat so that he can record them getting ripped apart by bloodthirsty chompers. So yeah, it’s not exactly a glowing advertisement for cage diving. But you can certainly view it as a cautionary tale if you’re looking for tips on how to do things differently if you want to avoid becoming chum.

Anyway, there’s also a romantic subplot that I thought was kind of sweet but that my fellow moviegoers kept snickering at.

Grade: 40 VHS Tapes out of 48 Fins

How to Understand the Situation by Watching ‘I Don’t Understand You’

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Do you understand the movie that is coming out of the projector?! (CREDIT: Vertical)

Starring: Nick Kroll, Andrew Rannells, Nunzia Schiano, Morgan Spector, Amanda Seyfried, Eleonora Romandini, Paolo Romano

Directors: David Joseph Craig and Brian Crano

Running Time: 96 Minutes

Rating: R

Release Date: June 6, 2025 (Theaters)

If you’re an American who’s about to vacation in Italy, should you be required to watch I Don’t Understand You before you leave? Better safe than sorry, I say! Chances are, things probably won’t spin as bloodily out of control for you as they do for Dom (Nick Kroll) and Cole (Andrew Rannells). But… if you don’t speak the language fluently, and if there are things back home that you have to worry about, well, then you could get stressed out. And stress could lead to situations you’ve never been in before. And that could result in you doing something that you’ll have to live with for the rest of your life. (Plus, the plot was loosely inspired by writing/directing duo David Joseph Craig and Brian Crano’s own journey of becoming fathers.) So yeah, it can’t hurt to prepare for that possibility ahead of time.

Grade: 1.2 Deads out of 2 Dads

Entertainment To-Do List: Week of 6/13/25

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I hope Francis had the Time of his Life (CREDIT: American Film Institute/Screenshot)

Every week, I list all the upcoming (or recently released) movies, TV shows, albums, podcasts, etc. that I believe are worth checking out.

Movies
How to Train Your Dragon 2025 (Theaters)
Materialists (Theaters)

TV
-AFI Life Achievement Award (June 18 on TNT) – Honoring Francis Ford Coppola.

Music
-The Cure, Mixes of a Lost World
-King Gizzard & the Lizard Wizard, Phantom Island
-Van Morrison, Remembering Now
-Slick Rick, Victory
-Neil Young and the Chrome Hearts, Talkin to the Trees

Sports
-Women’s PGA Championship (June 19-22 on Golf Channel, Peacock, and NBC) – They’re playing at Fields Ranch East in Texas this year.

2-For-1 Review: ‘How to Train Your Dragon’ and ‘Materialists’ Both Make My Heart Go Thump-a-Thump

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CREDIT: Atsushi Nishijima/A24; Universal Pictures

How to Train Your Dragon

Starring: Mason Thames, Nico Parker, Gerard Butler, Nick Frost, Julian Dennison, Gabriel Howell, Bronwyn James, Harry Trevaldwyn, Ruth Codd, Peter Serafinowicz

Director: Dean DeBlois

Running Time: 125 Minutes

Rating: PG for Dragons Taking Humans Higher Than They Should Go

Release Date: June 13, 2025 (Theaters)

Materialists

Starring: Dakota Johnson, Chris Evans, Pedro Pascal, Marin Ireland, Zoë Winters, Dasha Nekrosova, Louisa Jacobson

Director: Celine Song

Running Time: 117 Minutes

Rating: R, mostly for Discussions of a Date Gone Very Wrong

Release Date: June 13, 2025 (Theaters)

Picture this: it’s the weekend of June 13-15, 2025, and you want to see a new release at your local multiplex. How are you supposed to ever decide?! Especially if they’re total opposites? That isn’t quite the situation we have here, although the live-action remake of How to Train Your Dragon and the Celine Song-penned-and-helmed rom-com Materialists are certainly aiming for separate lanes. So if you’re a thorough cinephile like me who tries to see absolutely everything, where should you focus first? Or should you try to pull a Barbenheimer and make a double feature out of it? Let’s suss out the situation.

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Did ‘The Ritual’ Possess Me?

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And also with you (CREDIT: XYZ Films/Screenshot)

Starring: Dan Stevens, Al Pacino, Ashley Greene, Abigail Cowen, Patricia Heaton, Patrick Fabian

Director: David Midell

Running Time: 98 Minutes

Rating: Unrated

Release Date: June 6, 2025 (Theaters)

Hey everyone, I just wanted to let you all know real quick that I saw The Ritual in the theater. It’s an exorcism movie starring Al Pacino and Dan Stevens as a couple of priests. And Patricia Heaton plays a nun! I guess they’ll do anything these days. Apparently it’s based on a true story. I’m glad it’s not my true story. Alas, I fell asleep during the last half hour or so. Or maybe it was just the last 15 minutes? It was hard to tell, but next thing I knew when I opened my eyes back up, the end credits were starting. I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to fall asleep! I like to stay awake even for the movies I don’t find very interesting so that I can know why I don’t find them very interesting. Oh well. Maybe everyone (including the demon) would have been better off if they’d just slept through the whole exorcism? Something to think about…

Grade: The Devil Didn’t Make Me Do It

Entertainment To-Do List: Week of 6/6/25

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giving away more money this summer (CREDIT: FOX/Screenshot)

Every week, I list all the upcoming (or recently released) movies, TV shows, albums, podcasts, etc. that I believe are worth checking out.

Movies
Dangerous Animals (Theaters)
I Don’t Understand You (Theaters)
The Ritual (Theaters)

TV
Resident Alien Season 4 Premiere (June 6 on Syfy and USA)
-Tony Awards (June 8 on CBS) – Hosted by Cynthia Erivo.
The 1% Club Season Premiere (June 10 on FOX) – Hosted by Joel McHale this season.

Music
-Cypress Hill & London Symphony Orchestra, Black Sunday Live At The Royal Albert Hall
-The Doobie Brothers, Walk This Road
-Brian Eno and Beatie Wolfe, Luminal and Lateral
-Pulp, More

Sports
-Belmont Stakes (June 7 on FOX) – End of the Triple Crown.
-U.S. Open (June 12-15 on USA, NBC, and Peacock) – The golf version, returning to Oakmont Country Club.

 

‘Ballerina’ Review: Ana de Armas Dances Her Way to Vengeance – Will You Be Cheering Her On?

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I must have seen her (CREDIT: Murray Close//Lionsgate)

Starring: Ana de Armas, Anjelica Huston, Gabriel Byrne, Lance Reddick, Catalina Sandino Moreno, Norman Reedus, Ava Mccarthy, Ian McShane, Keanu Reeves

Director: Len Wiseman

Running Time: 125 Minutes

Rating: R for ALL of the Violence

Release Date: June 6, 2025 (Theaters)

What’s It About?: When Eve Macarro was just a little girl, she witnessed her father being brutally murdered right in front of her. So as you might suspect, she’s spent the rest of her life planning her revenge. In the meantime, she’s been training in the art of ballet (you might even call her the titular Ballerina) as part of the traditions of the assassin group known as the Ruska Roma. Since this all takes place in the world of John Wick, she stops by the Continental Hotel to track down those who were responsible for her father’s demise, which leads her to a centuries-old cult seemingly motivated purely by bloodshed. But if she’s not careful (or even if she is careful), her quest for vengeance could blow up an uneasy peace within the assassin underworld. And maybe if we’re lucky, John Wick himself might just show up to help her out, or stop her in her tracks.

What Made an Impression?: A New-Ish Kind of Revenge: The first John Wick movie did revenge a little differently, mainly by having the protagonist be motivated by a dead dog instead of a dead family member. Ballerina at first appears to be going the much more straightforward route. But ultimately, the climax paints a somewhat more complicated and intriguing picture. It’s far from the most groundbreaking portrait of vengeance ever, but it’s sufficient enough to hold your attention.
Backstory Schmackstory: Ballerina spins off primarily from John Wick: Chapter 3, which is my least favorite of the Wick series, mainly because it dived so deeply into lore that I just didn’t care one hoot about. Ballerina isn’t quite as lore-heavy, mostly operating in broad strokes about the rituals and truces of these assassin groups. It’s enough to set the tone without becoming impenetrable.
You Got to Be Versatile: Eve Macarro is no John Wick. Few action heroes are, though! To be fair to Ana de Armas, she’s at least a confident enough action hero to get the job done. She may not be getting inducted into the Fictional Assassin Hall of Fame anytime, but she does at least wield a flamethrower unforgettably. Also, she dispatches someone in a moment very reminiscent of the swordsman scene from Raiders of the Lost Ark, and I definitely enjoyed that moment.

Ballerina is Recommended If You: Wanted a John Wick movie without John Wick (but not entirely)

Grade: 3 out of 5 Broken Plates

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